First Night
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5
First Night
Hi All - I would love to get into more detail about who I am and what I'm about but I have limited time at work and will post last tonight when I get home. Tonight is my first sober night tonight and I don't know what to expect. I took my last drink at 3 am this morning, and have not really had much withdrawl other then shakes. Can anyone tell me what to expect? My doctor gave me a benzo perscription. Should I just take it and pass out during my ritual of coming home from work with a pint of 100 Proof Smirnoff after work every day? I'm scared. My "witching hour" is approaching.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome Cameron. I'd say take the benzo's exactly as described by your doctor.
Regarding what to expect, it's not going to be comfortable - but if you've seen a doc you will most likely be safe. Make sure someone else knows in case you need help and can't call for it yourself.
It's impossible to predict exactly how you will feel, but you might have some anxiety and general unrest, and the physical symptoms are all over the map. The main thing is to try and stay hydrated ( water ) eat some healthy food if you can stomach it, try to sleep as much as you can and have something to keep you occupied if possible. And if you feel things getting too bad, certainly don't be afraid to call the doc and ask.
Regarding what to expect, it's not going to be comfortable - but if you've seen a doc you will most likely be safe. Make sure someone else knows in case you need help and can't call for it yourself.
It's impossible to predict exactly how you will feel, but you might have some anxiety and general unrest, and the physical symptoms are all over the map. The main thing is to try and stay hydrated ( water ) eat some healthy food if you can stomach it, try to sleep as much as you can and have something to keep you occupied if possible. And if you feel things getting too bad, certainly don't be afraid to call the doc and ask.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5
Thank you for your reply Scott. I have done google searchs all day (which is how I found this website), and it sounds like it just various from person to person. All I know is after the binge this weekend, I woke up this morning and 3 am and told myself that it HAD to be today that I stopped drinking. I called my doctor and he called me an rx in if it got too unbearable but cautioned to go to the ER immediately if things escalate. It took everything I had to not call into work sick, however my drinking has never interferred with me being a productive worker, and I wasn't going to let it now that I made up my mind. The funny part is I'm actually excited that I don't have the pressure of drinking tonight, but my only fear are the withdrawls. I can't wait to remember eating dinner again because 7 times outta 10 I was either passed out for it or ate it and don't remember. I will probably watch the boards tonight for some support if I need it. Thanks again for your help.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 42
I'm also on my first night (back) so I'll be rooting for you. I stumbled earlier upon this collection of posts about first days and weeks sober. I was in a pretty bad physical (but sober!) state and reading about detox programs; I found it fascinating and helpful.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
It was just a good reminder for me that I'm not alone, which was definitely a comfort when I was feeling alone. You might also find it helpful to read more about how large the spectrum of withdrawal symptoms can be?
Though warning! You might just bookmark it for later if you're the kind of person who gets extremely anxious after looking at Web MD. You don't need to add any more worries. But it did help me today, so thought you might add it to your arsenal if you wanted.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
It was just a good reminder for me that I'm not alone, which was definitely a comfort when I was feeling alone. You might also find it helpful to read more about how large the spectrum of withdrawal symptoms can be?
Though warning! You might just bookmark it for later if you're the kind of person who gets extremely anxious after looking at Web MD. You don't need to add any more worries. But it did help me today, so thought you might add it to your arsenal if you wanted.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Originally Posted by Cameron958 
My doctor gave me a benzo perscription. Should I just take it and pass out during my ritual of coming home from work with a pint of 100 Proof Smirnoff after work every day? I'm scared. My "witching hour" is approaching.
So aren't you trying to quit?
Or maybe you mean you should take it INSTEAD of the ritual of coming home from work with a pint of 100 Proof Smirnoff?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5
Thanks all for the support. I am not taking benzos AND alcohol....the benzos were prescribed to help relieve the withdrawal symptons from not drinking. Was fine at home until about 9 pm....then husband asked me what was for dinner tomorrow and I flipped! Very unusual for me. It is very difficult to detox on your own. If I had resources I would do this in a detox center. So glad I found you guys.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5
LBrain what I meant by that comment was that my daily ritual for the past year has been to stop at one of 4 stores I rotated to get my 100 proof after work. Weekends were worse. Don't even get hung over anymore. I do inside sales and can drink until 3 am sleep for 2 hours and get up and work and negotiate like I wasn't just drunk of my butt 4 hours ago. I'm a very good functioning alcoholic. Finally hubby said it had to stop. I knew I had to stop. So I made that decision today!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Out west
Posts: 6
Originally Posted by Cameron958
LBrain what I meant by that comment was that my daily ritual for the past year has been to stop at one of 4 stores I rotated to get my 100 proof after work. Weekends were worse. Don't even get hung over anymore. I do inside sales and can drink until 3 am sleep for 2 hours and get up and work and negotiate like I wasn't just drunk of my butt 4 hours ago. I'm a very good functioning alcoholic. Finally hubby said it had to stop. I knew I had to stop. So I made that decision today!!
What benzo did you get? I think the mental part will be harder than the physical if you were just drinking a pint a day. There are people who drank a 1.75L every day and detoxed on their own. Of course everyone is different and the amount isn't the most solid indicator of how WD will be.
I refer back to the Quitting - what to expect thread all the time. Another one I've checked back to when I thought I was dying is..
soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/309928-all-these-physical-maladies-because-alcohell.html
and
soberrecovery.com/forums/alcoholism/203073-my-medical-conditions-cured-quitting-drinking-add-yours.html
I couldn't post clickable links because I don't have 15 posts yet, but if you copy and paste those you'll get there.
Good luck.
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,639
Hi Cameron and welcome to SR.
I found I had to change my ritual or I would want to pick up. I didn't even watch some tv programmes as they were triggers when I got home and started cooking our meal.
For me, there were many triggers which I avoided completely even to certain foods with me, a glass/bottle of wine went well with, well anything but some foods almost gave me permission to crack open a bottle, well that's what they did on many cookey programmes.
All the best and remember the withdrawals are so worth it in the long run, this isn't a sprint, it's a marathon.x
I found I had to change my ritual or I would want to pick up. I didn't even watch some tv programmes as they were triggers when I got home and started cooking our meal.
For me, there were many triggers which I avoided completely even to certain foods with me, a glass/bottle of wine went well with, well anything but some foods almost gave me permission to crack open a bottle, well that's what they did on many cookey programmes.
All the best and remember the withdrawals are so worth it in the long run, this isn't a sprint, it's a marathon.x
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 5
Hi All - OK so first night was terrible, last night was OK - however when it gets around 9 pm when I am usually toasted, the littiest things bother me. Usually I can tolerate the stress of my household with a few drinks - but last night was bad. After the meds kicked in, I was fine and slept a good nights rest. Today is so far so good. Sometimes I get scared or depressed thinking what am I going to do with time now that I am not drinking and passing out? What did everyone else to fill in the gap of time where you were normally plastered?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Out west
Posts: 6
Originally Posted by Cameron958
Hi All - OK so first night was terrible, last night was OK - however when it gets around 9 pm when I am usually toasted, the littiest things bother me. Usually I can tolerate the stress of my household with a few drinks - but last night was bad. After the meds kicked in, I was fine and slept a good nights rest. Today is so far so good. Sometimes I get scared or depressed thinking what am I going to do with time now that I am not drinking and passing out? What did everyone else to fill in the gap of time where you were normally plastered?
I read everything I could or watched interesting videos/documentaries on youtube while riding my exercise bike. Everyone always says it but if you don't exercise, you need to start because it really helps. I also go to AA now and it really helps. It's nothing like I thought it would be. I wish I would've gone sooner.. and here is something I read that helps me fight the urge to drink...
Hello, I am your disease
I Hate meetings...I Hate higher powers...I Hate anyone who has a program. To all who come in contact with me, I wish you death and I wish you suffering. Allow me to introduce myself, I am the disease of addiction. I Am cunning, baffling, and powerful. That's Me. I have killed millions and I am pleased.
I love to catch you with the element of suprise. I love pretending I am your friend and lover. I have given you comfort, haven't I? Wasn't I there when you were lonely? When you wanted to die, didn't you call on me? I was there, I love to make you hurt. I love to make you cry. Better yet, I Love to make you so numb you can neither hurt nor cry. When you can't feel anything at all. This is true gratification. And all that I ask from you is long term suffering. I've been there for you always.
When things were going right in your life, you invited me. You said you didn't deserve these good things, and I was the only one who would agree with you. Together we were able to destroy all the good things in your life. People don't take me seriously. They take strokes seriously, heart attacks, even diabetes, they take seriously. Fools. Without my help these things would not be possible. I am such a hated disease, and yet I do not come uninvited. You choose to have me. So many have chosen me over reality and peace.
More than you hate me, I hate all of you who have a 12 step program. Your program, Your meeting, Your higher power. All of these things weaken me, and I can't function in the manner I am accustomed to. Now I must lie here quietly. You don't see me but I am growing bigger than ever. When you only exist, I may live. When you live I may only exist. But I am here...
And until we meet again, If we meet again, I wish you death and suffering.
I am your friend
I am your friend, the only true companion you have.
I am with you when you are lonely;
I am with you when you are sad.
I am with you when you feel withdrawn and when the world is cruel.
I hide the heckler's words and block the missiles thrown in ignorance and anger.
I shelter you from the storms and I shield you from your fears.
I am your friend. I walk with you daily and live in your thoughts.
I feed off your failures, I revel in your guilt.
I thrive on your shame and dance with your deceit.
I keep you in darkness and take pleasure in your pain.
I delight in your loneliness and wallow in your sins.
I laugh when you flounder and strike when you stumble.
I am your friend.
I relish in your anger and worship in your pride.
I feed off your compulsion and dwell in your isolation.
I am familiar with your weaknesses and abuse your denial.
I treasure your resentment and take comfort in your depression.
I am your friend
My name is "Your Disease."
I am your friend. I hold out my hand and bring you faith.
I award you serenity and self-esteem.
I bestow upon you peace and acceptance.
I wrap you in love and tender the shield of knowledge.
I volunteer humility and shower you with confidence.
I bequeath spiritual growth, emotional advancement and physical revival.
I am your friend; I will lead you out of the darkness into the light.
I will carry you when you are weak and escort you through honesty.
I will provide tools for the battles and binding for your wounds.
I am your friend. I will teach you abstinence and release you from burden.
I will initiate forgiveness and I will foster willingness.
I will nurture ambition and claim back your life.
I am your friend.
My name is "Recovery."
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