DavidS27

Hi guy's thanks for reading this post. I'm 6 months sober but I'm still scared as I still get urges , cravings and the desire to drink alcohol. I used to use alcohol to relax me due to it instantly relaxing me but now I don't have any other way to relax I've tried everything , all tested and failed. I guess I liked alcohol because it would numb me as I suffer with depression and anxiety which I'm on medication for I take 150mg sertraline , it works really well. However , I feel so lost and alone because I don't have any friends but when I used to they just drank , we were drinking buddies , now I have nothing just my fiancé. I find it hard because I'm more emotional as a person than I used to be and I find it really hard controlling any emotion , there's never a balance. I do feel like a veil has been lifted off my face and it's possible to see what drinking does to people it stops them being mentally fit as well as physically , which is a shame really. However , I feel alone for having those qualities because it's no fun being the only one who doesn't drink. Now I have a new addiction. . . The internet ! Why do I get addicted to things so easily ?

Dee74

Hi David - welcome

I got urges for a long time - I'd drunk for 20 years.

Personally I don't think urges are the mark of our recovery - but what we do in response to them is.

You must be doing something right in your response to reach 6 months - congratulations

I lost a lot of friends too - or drinking buddies really cos our common bond was drinking.

I made a lot of new friends tho and reconnected with old ones I'd drifted away from when drinking took over.

Do you have any hobbies or interests? things like that can be a great way to meet new people, and establish yourself as a non drinker right from the off.

Did you ever try AA or any other meeting based recovery group. That would be another way to meet new people, and sober ones to boot

D

DavidS27

I would like to go to AA but I am a really shy person so would probably faint lol

PurpleKnight

Hey David!! Welcome to the Forum!!

You'll find loads of support here on SR, there's plenty of people who have felt the same things!!

afloatsober

Morning David
6 month is still early days as is 14 months for me. These withdrawals take a while mate. I have learned that once the initial stuff has run it's course (shakes, sweats, foggy brain etc) many of us experience post acute withdrawal. Great info on this on this site. It has resulted in all sorts of mood swings and emotional upheaval for me over the past few months.
Good news is that it is getting markedly better as time goes on, and i feel the end is in sight.
I also find that in addition to S/R, some face to face contact and identification helps me. I choose AA as a means of doing that and know that meetings in London are frequent (like hundreds.)
If AA is not for you then perhaps have a look at other options. Lifering, AVRT and others spring to mind.
Above all, i realised that this is about doing things differently and in time our thinking will change!!! And my thinking has always been my problem, even before the booze......
I send my best wishes and hope that you find this website as informative and healthy as i have.
Be safe.
G

MIRecovery

Recovery is about change. Isolation and loneliness are alcoholism strongest allies. Try an A A meeting you will not faint and it will likely be the best thing you have ever done

IOAA2

Hi and congratulations on 6 months.
AA is not full of creepy people, they understand us and the processes we go through to sustain sobriety. Each person there had a first meeting jitters to overcome. There are different types of meetings and you might be asked to introduce yourself and you can say “I’m Joe and visiting.”
It’s suggested 90 meetings in 90 days which will give a you a chance to understand and become teachable as I was not for too long.
I suggest a meeting list and ask someone what the different abbreviations mean.
All this is dependent on how soon we want to get better.
BE WELL

Spinach

Give AA a try I'm sure you won't faint, but you will know if your comfortable or not and it will build something else into your life, if you can have drinking buddies you can have AA buddies it's just a different drink and building.
You made the decision to stop and you have, your life is so much better, drinking doesn't get better but sobriety does! Good luck.
Depression is no good and can be far worse self medicating.
John.

EndGameNYC

I had intense, daily cravings for the better part of a year, this while being involved in outpatient treatment and AA, the latter of which I attended pretty much every day. Talking about my cravings with people who were both helpful and understanding got me through. Without either of these things, I surely would have picked up the drink and then made my life much worse again.

As others have suggested, the way out of your situation is to get additional help. Other than that, I don't see this improving on its own. Many of us (perhaps most?) needed outside help. Speaking for myself, again, making that move was extremely valuable.

Taking action on our own behalf, reaching out for help, is not a solitary or unitary phenomenon. It isn't just about putting ourselves out there; it's about changing our lives for the better in ways that we cannot even imagine until we actually take that first step.

Do yourself a favor. Stop settling for less. Come back to the world of the living.

neferkamichael

DavidS27, 6 months sober is FANTASTIC, congratulations. I consider the expectations to be instantly satisfied to be as big of a problem as any I have, however, the urges, cravings and desire to drink have all but vanished and that started happening at about a year sober. Rootin for ya.

LBrain

I agree with the cat in the hat. And also to what Dee implies. Even if you can force yourself to AA, there is much more than that.
Dependance on the internet can become debilitating itself.

Find some hobbies - I know everyone says that. Go for a walk or just get out of the house. Go for ice-cream.

150 mg sertraline is a pretty decent dose. Are you also getting therapy?

I would recommend discussing with your partner options for things to do besides just sitting around. Get out and get the blood moving. Exercise.

Welcome to the forum.

Aellyce

Hi David,

I've just seen your thread after posting on a similar other thread, check it out:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post4690010

I definitely suggest to expand your social connections to more than only your partner. There are many ways to do this.

The internet can probably become a "problem" for most people in the relatively well developed areas of the world these days. I definitely can't exist without it long. The thing to do is what Brain said, and maybe try to have 1-2 days of break every now and then and do others things in the 3D world. I find that variety is important in life, otherwise we do start obsessing the same thing over and over.