coming back
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: East Coast, USA
Posts: 81
coming back
Hi all,
I was on here a few months back, when I had my first real experience with admitting to myself that I might have a problem with alcohol. I found so much support and was able to stop drinking for about 3 weeks, but then fell victim to the "I can just drink once a month" or whatever rationalizing way of thinking. I think part of me always knew that was BS, because even though I told myself it was a good plan, I was ashamed to come here and post.
Long story short, I ended up on a bit of a bender, and the withdrawal symptoms kept getting worse. At the end of last week I was experiencing some shaking and cravings and severe anxiety attacks until I would drink again. That was scary and another wake up call. I'd been severely depressed while I'd been drinking too, almost suicidal.
I've been sober 2.5 days now, and saw a therapist today for the first time in years. She encouraged me to go to a meeting and gave me a list of some to try. I hope I can work up the guts to do that this week, but I'm not sure, to be honest. I guess at least I know now that staying sober will be more difficult than I thought it would be in the rush of excitement about changing my life that characterized my first attempt. I'm not excited about this battle but I know it's one I need to fight.
I hope anyone reading this is doing well, or hanging in there. I'm so glad you're all here and that this place exists.
I was on here a few months back, when I had my first real experience with admitting to myself that I might have a problem with alcohol. I found so much support and was able to stop drinking for about 3 weeks, but then fell victim to the "I can just drink once a month" or whatever rationalizing way of thinking. I think part of me always knew that was BS, because even though I told myself it was a good plan, I was ashamed to come here and post.
Long story short, I ended up on a bit of a bender, and the withdrawal symptoms kept getting worse. At the end of last week I was experiencing some shaking and cravings and severe anxiety attacks until I would drink again. That was scary and another wake up call. I'd been severely depressed while I'd been drinking too, almost suicidal.
I've been sober 2.5 days now, and saw a therapist today for the first time in years. She encouraged me to go to a meeting and gave me a list of some to try. I hope I can work up the guts to do that this week, but I'm not sure, to be honest. I guess at least I know now that staying sober will be more difficult than I thought it would be in the rush of excitement about changing my life that characterized my first attempt. I'm not excited about this battle but I know it's one I need to fight.
I hope anyone reading this is doing well, or hanging in there. I'm so glad you're all here and that this place exists.
Welcome back to SR!!
For me the decision had to be all or nothing, abstaining from alcohol doesn't cure or fix me, the problem still exists, so the door needed to be kept firmly closed.
Keep pushing through and you'll get there!!
For me the decision had to be all or nothing, abstaining from alcohol doesn't cure or fix me, the problem still exists, so the door needed to be kept firmly closed.
Keep pushing through and you'll get there!!
Hi all,
I was on here a few months back, when I had my first real experience with admitting to myself that I might have a problem with alcohol. I found so much support and was able to stop drinking for about 3 weeks, but then fell victim to the "I can just drink once a month" or whatever rationalizing way of thinking. I think part of me always knew that was BS, because even though I told myself it was a good plan, I was ashamed to come here and post.
Long story short, I ended up on a bit of a bender, and the withdrawal symptoms kept getting worse. At the end of last week I was experiencing some shaking and cravings and severe anxiety attacks until I would drink again. That was scary and another wake up call. I'd been severely depressed while I'd been drinking too, almost suicidal.
I've been sober 2.5 days now, and saw a therapist today for the first time in years. She encouraged me to go to a meeting and gave me a list of some to try. I hope I can work up the guts to do that this week, but I'm not sure, to be honest. I guess at least I know now that staying sober will be more difficult than I thought it would be in the rush of excitement about changing my life that characterized my first attempt. I'm not excited about this battle but I know it's one I need to fight.
I hope anyone reading this is doing well, or hanging in there. I'm so glad you're all here and that this place exists.
I was on here a few months back, when I had my first real experience with admitting to myself that I might have a problem with alcohol. I found so much support and was able to stop drinking for about 3 weeks, but then fell victim to the "I can just drink once a month" or whatever rationalizing way of thinking. I think part of me always knew that was BS, because even though I told myself it was a good plan, I was ashamed to come here and post.
Long story short, I ended up on a bit of a bender, and the withdrawal symptoms kept getting worse. At the end of last week I was experiencing some shaking and cravings and severe anxiety attacks until I would drink again. That was scary and another wake up call. I'd been severely depressed while I'd been drinking too, almost suicidal.
I've been sober 2.5 days now, and saw a therapist today for the first time in years. She encouraged me to go to a meeting and gave me a list of some to try. I hope I can work up the guts to do that this week, but I'm not sure, to be honest. I guess at least I know now that staying sober will be more difficult than I thought it would be in the rush of excitement about changing my life that characterized my first attempt. I'm not excited about this battle but I know it's one I need to fight.
I hope anyone reading this is doing well, or hanging in there. I'm so glad you're all here and that this place exists.
Gracette,
Just go by the seat of your pants. I know it can be scary but you need to remember that they all are there for the same reason as you. If you can muster it say hello. Sit and listen. If you feel the need speak. Otherwise just take in. You can get a 24 hour chip if they do a chip system. And Good Luck!
You're making it happen!
Just go by the seat of your pants. I know it can be scary but you need to remember that they all are there for the same reason as you. If you can muster it say hello. Sit and listen. If you feel the need speak. Otherwise just take in. You can get a 24 hour chip if they do a chip system. And Good Luck!
You're making it happen!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: East Coast, USA
Posts: 81
Thanks Kris, that is really helpful. I sort of have this problem with everything, where I start imagining every possible thing that could happen and thus psyching myself out of taking action... I was really nervous about going to a therapist today and I ended up telling myself "all you have to do is not run away" - I guess the same holds with going to meetings.
Welcome back Gracette
I had the habit of 'mentally running ahead' too - it made even simple things seem overwhelming.
Try as best you can to 'stay in the day' - all any of us can do is live one day at a time, all any of us have to work with is 24 hours.
It's important to remember too that 99.99% of the things I used to imagine happening didn't actually happen at all
There's a lot of support here - you're not alone
D
I had the habit of 'mentally running ahead' too - it made even simple things seem overwhelming.
Try as best you can to 'stay in the day' - all any of us can do is live one day at a time, all any of us have to work with is 24 hours.
It's important to remember too that 99.99% of the things I used to imagine happening didn't actually happen at all
There's a lot of support here - you're not alone
D
Then he took me to a meeting that night. He looked after me, introduced me to a few people and let the chairman know I did not want to speak.
I will always be grateful to that man. Not only did he give me hope, but he made it possible for me to get into AA and develop this wonderful new way of life. He looked after me for the next few days until I could find my own way around.
Sometimes going to a meeting cold can be a bit of a lottery. You never know what kind of meeting you might strike, and some are a bit off the wall. I always recommend talking to someone first and at least getting some advice on which meeting would be best to start with.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: East Coast, USA
Posts: 81
Sometimes going to a meeting cold can be a bit of a lottery. You never know what kind of meeting you might strike, and some are a bit off the wall. I always recommend talking to someone first and at least getting some advice on which meeting would be best to start with.
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