Laura567

So I am struggling with my addiction, only a few days sober and I get a call this morning from work - one of my employees was clearly drunk at work yesterday. So now it is my responsibility to arrange for him to get help. So today was spent calling our addiction-partner-company (sorry my English is not the best..) and arranging meetings and blood work next week. And of course I need to meet the employee on Monday and talk to him about this. He works at a site far from here and that is why the meeting can´t be held today.

This could have been me, and I don´t know if it is a good or bad thing that I do understand the disease. For me it is yet another wake up call.
I was also sursprised at how other people reacted. I was even advised to try to fire her so I don´t have to pay for rehabilitation. One referred to it as a "disease" thinking that it isn´t. But most felt just bad, trying to explain that maybe it was something else, not alcohol. And really not understanding addiction at all -"Why would you come to work drunk???"

Next week will be a tough one for my employee and for me. I hope that I can get him some help, and I hope the whole situaton willhelp me stay focused and sober.

serious

everything happens for a reason.

clearly you have a choice to help this person. do the right thing. perhaps it's the person's "wake up" call...

have you considered being honest about your struggle?

Verte

I think it has the potential to be a great thing for both of you.

You can reach inside yourself and offer this stranger the very best you have to offer, understanding and compassion, so this is a good thing for you.

The employee will no doubt benefit from this understanding and compassion, independent of her immediate reaction. No matter how she receives your guidance as a superior and peer she will no doubt be grateful one day - even if she cannot verbalize this gratitude at the time.

Nice job with maintaining your own sobriety

WanderingBear

Around 20 years ago I used to work with a guy who was a really bad alcoholic. I'd say he was mid 40's at the time, but he looked close to 60. The minute he got off work, he would go next door to the bar and drink until he was urinating himself at the stool, and when he would get kicked out he would sometimes stagger by the workplace again and embarrass himself. He smelled very badly of booze every day, and the customers started complaining about him, one accusing him of being drunk (which he probably was). The company offered to pay for rehab in exchange for not firing him. He said "I'm NEVER quitting drinking!" He was fired and I don't think he lived another year before he was dead. It was a pretty sad decline.

resolute50

"and I don´t know if it is a good or bad thing that I do understand the disease."

It's a good thing. Because you can have compassion because you understand.

sugarbear1

we never think we are as drunk as we get

LBrain

Good luck Laura, I'm sure you'll do the right thing.

Zebra1275

Good luck Laura!

I had to do a similar thing with one of my employee's a few years ago. She had been drunk at work, etc. and I was the boss of the division she was in. It occurred to me to share my story with her, maybe because I thought it would look like I knew what I was talking about. Since no one at work knew I had a drinking problem I decided not to do that.

I'm so glad I didn't disclose my alcoholism to her. What a huge mistake that would have been, as she didn't seek treatment and instead lawyered up. If she knew I was a drunk I'm sure that would have been used against me to make her own situation seem better.

My advice, keep your drinking history to yourself. There is no "upside" for you to disclose this, only a downside.

least

I agree with Zebra. Keep your own drinking out of it. Just be compassionate and firm in dealing with this person.

rainmanjw

So much to consider on his one. From a professional position you will have to follow your companies HR policies. From a personal aspect if this person indeed is a problem drinker I think we as alcoholics have that obligation to carry the message of sober living. We can only speak to how it was for us and hope they have the desire to quit drinking. I wish you well on whatever path you take.

Berrybean

I think that Zebra is right. Offer your compassion, understanding, and good will in the form of practical help. Do NOT offer them your head on a plate.

I think your intentions sound great, and you are obviously geared up to do the right thing. That doesn't mean that they are going to trust / understand / appreciate what you are doing. Good luck.

Dee74

To a point I think, sure....but it would be either be saintly or foolish to carry the message if it was to our detriment, yeah?.

I tend to agree with Zebra on this one.

You're not that long sober yourself Laura - get your employee some help, but look after yourself and your recovery too.

D

Nuudawn

I am of the camp that sides with keeping your personal issue personal and simply doing the job you are employed to do. Obviously your empathy will be helpful in the situation but you have your own sobriety to protect first and foremost. If this soul is being steered in the right direction by your company, there will be plenty of other sober hands to catch him in rehab. In time, it may be something you want to share...but I don't think your hand should be forced only a few days sober yourself if its something you are not comfortable with. I do think though..everything happens for a reason.