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Brookie 07-04-2004 12:56 PM

Starting over
 
I fell off the wagon Friday after a week of sobriety. For those many people on the board who have been so supportive during the week, I am very sorry.

I know the reason that I screwed up - I wasn't ready yet, and didn't have a plan. Instead, I stopped basically on a whim and a dare, and made only a week. I am not crying today, or tearing my clothes with shame, because I think the positives from the past week far outweigh the negatives even though I drank this weekend. I am especially grateful to Splend, who challenged me to stay dry for a week. I have finally come to grips with the fact that I am an alcoholic. Ironically, it was the difficulty in not drinking that convinced me, rather than my experiences drinking. Also, I attended my first AA meeting Wednesday and plan to go back (actually, I tried to go to Friday but it was cancelled b/c of the holiday weekend - which seems kind of backward to me). All in all, I learned some pretty big life lessons this week, and I am very appreciative for the help I received on this board.

I am going to start over and this time make a real commitment to getting sober. Before I jump back in, though, I need a little time to plan and figure out a few difficult questions. The most difficult is what I say to my wife. I kept the reason for my sobriety this week to myself. The ugly truth is, I didn't want to burn my bridges in case I decided to quit quitting, so I set myself up to fail.

Anyway, I wanted to be as honest with you all as I could. I am not going away, and I will have a new "Day One" as soon as I get my head straight. Thanks again for all of your love and support.

God bless,
Joe

ted 07-04-2004 01:05 PM

HEY JOE.WHERE YOU GOIN' WITH THAT.....SORRY I GET CARRIED AWAY SOMETIMES.
YOU CAN DO IT.YOU SOUND LIKE YOU'VE COME TO THE CONCLUSION YOUR ALCOHOLIC,I HAVE TO.
WE CAN'T DO IT ALONE,REACH OUT,ASK FOR HELP.
GOING TO MEETINGS SURE WOULN'T EITHER....GODSPEED
...........ted :usa2:

degadar 07-04-2004 01:38 PM

Joe - that's the spirit. It's good you're determined to have a new 'Day One". If you fail the second or third or fourth time, you're still better off and have consumed less than if you'd not tried - that's what I kept telling myself, sort of took the pressure off a bit.

Getting over the ... FOREVER???? concept is hard. Was for me any road.

The first week or so is the hard part - and now you know you can do it.

Good luck matey

DEg.

Dan 07-04-2004 04:26 PM


Originally Posted by Brookie
All in all, I learned some pretty big life lessons this week

Awesome. As long as we're teachable, there is hope.

Chy 07-04-2004 05:32 PM

Hey Joe! ( That's a cool song btw)

You never have to apologize here k? Just keep coming back!

1Marty 07-04-2004 09:01 PM


Originally Posted by Brookie
I am going to start over and this time make a real commitment to getting sober.

Great! Keep coming back Joe!

MootPoint 07-04-2004 10:11 PM

Glad to see you back, Joe. Sounds like you learned your lessons and are ready to move on....... that's all we can ask!

Brookie 07-05-2004 10:16 AM

Thanks all for the support. Not a proud moment for me, but I feel like I'm on the right path (or will be soon). It helps so much to have fellow travelors like yourselves.

Incidentally, I'm going to shoot my old lady. You know, I caught her messin' round with another man. I used to get that question with amazing frequency in High School. :)

Dan 07-05-2004 10:17 AM

Joe, that's humor right?

Chy 07-05-2004 10:20 AM


Originally Posted by Brookie
Incidentally, I'm going to shoot my old lady. You know, I caught her messin' round with another man. I used to get that question with amazing frequency in High School. :)

Uhhh Joe, bad idea! :thinking:

Brookie 07-05-2004 10:29 AM

Humor. Definitely humor. Not feeling any murderous urges whatsoever, but thanks for checking in.

It's the second line to the Hendrix song "Hey Joe," delivered in response to the question, "Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand." Meant to be funny (hence the smiley face), but I can see how one might get the wrong impression, particularly if you didn't catch Ted's reference to the song.

KelKel 07-05-2004 10:33 AM

Hi Joe
Welcome back...

I heard the song in my head when I read the words...

Dan 07-05-2004 10:37 AM


Originally Posted by Brookie
Humor. Definitely humor. Not feeling any murderous urges whatsoever, but thanks for checking in.

It's the second line to the Hendrix song "Hey Joe," delivered in response to the question, "Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand." Meant to be funny (hence the smiley face), but I can see how one might get the wrong impression, particularly if you didn't catch Ted's reference to the song.

:lmaoChalk it up to addict brain not getting the whole picture Joe!
Sorry man.

junem 07-05-2004 03:58 PM

Brookie,
We get sober by learning from our mistakes. Stick with the AA meetings. I always get what I need from a meeting as long as I am willing to listen. Together we can do it!!!!


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