Day 1 - another attempt at quitting...
 

I've been drinking again pretty much constantly since my last visit here. I decided it would be O.K to have a drink and that I could moderate - we all know the outcome of that, so here I am again, at day 1 again, feeling tired, ashamed, ill, etc. etc. the usual list of misery that accompanies booze.

Put it behind you and move on! I'm on Day 4. It will get better.

PS I just got through that so I do understand. Keep reminding yourself that feeling bad is not a reason to drink. It's a moment of relief but then you have to start again:)

Thank you for posting. That is an great point: I can't moderate or I would have done it a long time ago. Good luck in your recovery, maybe try something different this time.

Ah, james, once you accept the fact that you cannot moderate, the freedom you might feel is amazing :)

When I knew that drinking was out of the equation, I could also say goodbye to obsessing over the alcohol content of wine and the number of glasses I could have; wondering how I could possibly pace myself once I'd got the taste; agonising about whether or not to get the next bottle; worrying about getting home; panicking about what I might do or say, etc etc :(

This is a much easier way to live :c007:

Just seen that you used to be James18! Welcome back, my friend ♥♥♥

That is and has always been my problem. I have been unwilling to accept that I cannot moderate. I always assumed there was some kind of trick to it; something I hadn't tried...a 1000 'day 1's and I have finnaly arrived at the truth - I can't moderate my drinking.

It's a hard thing to accept that darn it...why can't we just be like other people that can have a drink today and not think about it for 6 months? We're different. We didn't ask for this. But at the end of the day we have to accept it. So accept it. There is so much out there in life to enjoy. Alcohol is a prison. Next time you want to drink post here before you do. Please.

That's what it took for me. Do you have any ideas about what you might try this time around to keep from picking up that first one?

Well at least you now know the answer which will no doubt help you in the future,
Get back on and ride it out you can do this.

Hi James... I just made my way back here too, after attempting to moderate. Of course it didn't work out the way I'd hoped. Good luck this time!

Welcome back, James!

Thanks. It's been a while :)

I don't know. I'm possibly willing to try AA at this point. Anything that might help...

Hi, it never does work, moderation...the quicker you come to terms with that the better - it's took me years and it has finally sunk in (I hope). Good luck to you too.

Thanks Anna. This time I'll stick around...

Glad to see you James. :) Sometimes we need further proof that we can't touch the stuff. I sure did. I'm glad you came back to give it another go. We know you can do this.

Thanks Hevyn. It's nice to be back...I guess I needed a little more convincing that I can't drink 'normally'.

I am one day 1 myself! Today was also my "ah - ha" moment. Or actually this morning. Every time I think I'll have just a few I'll end up a mess. Moderation has not worked for me. It's a freeing and very scary feeling to stop drinking. This is my first time asking for help from outsiders.

Hi, the decision to stop drinking and the realization that you can't drink any more is a big step to take. For me, and probably for you, it's a neccessary one though. It will be helpful being on this forum, there are some great people on here. I found asking for help really difficult (and still do), but there's no reason you need to do this on your own.

Welcome back James! "possibly trying something that might help" 'aint gonna cut it. Not trying to be rude, but you've been here and done this before many, many times. If you truly do mean that you've finally admitted that you cannot moderate, you have to be not only willing, but active and putting in the work/time that is required each and every day. Intending to get sober and getting sober are 2 completely different things. Why not make this the time that you actually do it - we are all here to help you along the way.

You're right. I've been thinking about stopping drinking more than actively doing it. Quitting is much harder than I thought - I've underestimated it right from the start. I need to start putting in the work.