i feel a little guilty
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Nova Scotia
Posts: 100
i feel a little guilty
Hi, I have been sober for 17 months. Im happy about where i am in my sobriety. Whats troubling me ia my brother. He just went into rehab on monday and he was able to call me today. I was so excited to hear from him that i couldnt stop talking. Im feeling bad because he only got to tell me one thing and i didnt even give him a chance to tell me much more. I love him soooo much. I dont want him to think that i wont be there to listen to him during this new change in his life. Im so proud of him and it makes me so happy emotional to know that hes trying to sober up. Im crying tears of joy as i write this because im so proud of him. He sounded so sad and heavy hearted on the phone. I know theres a lot on his mind and his body is aching to go home. Maybe im over racting to eveeything but i remember feeling like no one knew what i was feeling. I never want him to feel like that. I wish i could call him rightnw. I cant wait til he comes home for the weekend. I just wish i could tell him all of this and its almost 5 am here and i felt too emotional to keep this to myself. Please keep my bro in your prayers to give him strength to keep going. Ill be praying for each and every one of you. <3
Prayers for you both xx
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
When I was in treatment I really didn't want to talk to family for the first week to 10 days. It's just such a rough time. Part of how treatment can help is to have a break from the guilt and fear and stuff that came to us through our addiction. just a few weeks without having to think about all complicated family stuff.
You clearly are supportive. He may just be better served by being able to take a bit of time without family to just deal with his own stuff. I'm sure your talk means a lot to him, but it may also pull him back to the fears and stress that freak him out.
All I needed my family and friends to say is "we love you. you aren't a bad person. focus on what you need". The rest can be said later
As a family member that is hard to do (I have a number of alkie friends and relatives I've been through with this). I really believe that the first week to 10 days is just about letting people do what they need to do to get ok with the big jump to being sober.
Sounds like you are doing the best you can in a difficult situation. Just let him know you are there. The details aren't important. Take a moment and breath deep. Allow him the same and you will be ok . He might actually be happy to not have to deal with the emotional stuff till he has a month or two under his belt.
(hug) will be thinking of you.
You clearly are supportive. He may just be better served by being able to take a bit of time without family to just deal with his own stuff. I'm sure your talk means a lot to him, but it may also pull him back to the fears and stress that freak him out.
All I needed my family and friends to say is "we love you. you aren't a bad person. focus on what you need". The rest can be said later
As a family member that is hard to do (I have a number of alkie friends and relatives I've been through with this). I really believe that the first week to 10 days is just about letting people do what they need to do to get ok with the big jump to being sober.
Sounds like you are doing the best you can in a difficult situation. Just let him know you are there. The details aren't important. Take a moment and breath deep. Allow him the same and you will be ok
. He might actually be happy to not have to deal with the emotional stuff till he has a month or two under his belt.(hug) will be thinking of you.
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