Day 4. Craving.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 809
Day 4. Craving.
Wellll back to day 4. Feeling physically better and a little less crazy.
Can anyone relate to this feeling… I don’t know how to describe it but it’s like a burning feeling in my stomach. Starts off small. The more I think about drinking the bigger it gets the more it burns. The bigger it gets the more I think about alcohol the more I obsess. Maybe it’s like a ball or knot of emotions tied up in there. I dunno what it is or how to stop it but it’s there now. Burning and growing…………. It’s an urge I guess. I know I could quiet that urge or soothe the burning with a cold glass, bottle of wine. It would feel amazing to put that glass to my lips and feel the warmth running from the tip of my lips throughout my veins and my entire body. It would feel like...... ugh. I can't stop picturing what it would feel like.
God I want it so badly right now.
But I know it will only bring me trouble.
I don’t want to be hungover tomorrow. I don't want to feel crazy tomorrow. And I know there are plenty of other reasons not to drink but I can’t think of them right now. Every time I think of one my brain immediately comes up with an excuse to match it.
Grrrrr.
Hanging on hanging on.
Can anyone relate to this feeling… I don’t know how to describe it but it’s like a burning feeling in my stomach. Starts off small. The more I think about drinking the bigger it gets the more it burns. The bigger it gets the more I think about alcohol the more I obsess. Maybe it’s like a ball or knot of emotions tied up in there. I dunno what it is or how to stop it but it’s there now. Burning and growing…………. It’s an urge I guess. I know I could quiet that urge or soothe the burning with a cold glass, bottle of wine. It would feel amazing to put that glass to my lips and feel the warmth running from the tip of my lips throughout my veins and my entire body. It would feel like...... ugh. I can't stop picturing what it would feel like.
God I want it so badly right now.
But I know it will only bring me trouble.
I don’t want to be hungover tomorrow. I don't want to feel crazy tomorrow. And I know there are plenty of other reasons not to drink but I can’t think of them right now. Every time I think of one my brain immediately comes up with an excuse to match it.
Grrrrr.
Hanging on hanging on.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 809
Work until 4. Personal training from 4 until 5. Dinner from 5 until 6. Walk the dog from 6 until 7. Go look at a new car from 7 until 8. Watch TV at home from 8 until 10. Bed. Sounds safe right?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: casablanca
Posts: 282
thinking about drinking will always come and go, entertaining the idea is what's dangerous. in my case once I entertain the the thought, I'm gone, it's over. what I do now is what I call thought stoppage. I stop that voice before it gets bigger in my brain. and I call it the addictive voice, it will only remind you of the good times, never the bad times. I use both AA and AVRT( addictive voice recogtnition technique) you can check out their site.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: TN
Posts: 114
I'm headed for day 4 tomorrow. I know exactly the stomach issue your speaking of. For me it's finally tapering off. It's your stomach lining and it's most likely trying to heal right now. Hang in there because your body is adjusting. You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,859
I remember so well, Mrrryah. Chardonnay was my poison and by 3:00 pm every day during my drinking career I was planning my evening with my glass of Chard in my hand. Yes, I could smell it, taste it, feel the warmth and anticipate the glow long before I opened the bottle. But it never ended well; by the time I went to bed each night, I was regretting my weakness and my excessive rate of consumption; by 3:00 am and awake with a racing heart, I was promising myself that I would not drink again; by 7:00 am, I was heading to work hungover and full of self- loathing and resolve that I was never to drink again; by 11:00 am, I could feel that resolve beginning to mentally dissolve only to find myself at 3:00 pm planning my glass of Chard when I arrived home at 7:00. I was trapped in a vicious cycle of my own making.
Finally, I arrived at the point where I had had enough; one evening at 7:35 pm (885 days ago), I put that glass down and said "enough; enough; enough". I was tired, broken, defeated.
Stay strong, Mrrryah. Keep posting. I will be here most of the afternoon and into the evening and so will dozens of people who truly want you to succeed. Lean on us.
Finally, I arrived at the point where I had had enough; one evening at 7:35 pm (885 days ago), I put that glass down and said "enough; enough; enough". I was tired, broken, defeated.
Stay strong, Mrrryah. Keep posting. I will be here most of the afternoon and into the evening and so will dozens of people who truly want you to succeed. Lean on us.
☀️⛳️
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,506
Originally Posted by Mrrryah1 
Work until 4. Personal training from 4 until 5. Dinner from 5 until 6. Walk the dog from 6 until 7. Go look at a new car from 7 until 8. Watch TV at home from 8 until 10. Bed. Sounds safe right?
Sounds like a well thought out plan, I found when I had time on my hands was hard initially, better kept busy it does help keep your mind focused.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 809
OMG – SOOOO relate SoberLeigh!!!! That’s practically my exact schedule and thoughts every day (when I’m drinking). Happy to be on day 4 and hoping to sign in for day 5 tomorrow
Originally Posted by SoberLeigh
I remember so well, Mrrryah. Chardonnay was my poison and by 3:00 pm every day during my drinking career I was planning my evening with my glass of Chard in my hand. Yes, I could smell it, taste it, feel the warmth and anticipate the glow long before I opened the bottle. But it never ended well; by the time I went to bed each night, I was regretting my weakness and my excessive rate of consumption; by 3:00 am and awake with a racing heart, I was promising myself that I would not drink again; by 7:00 am, I was heading to work hungover and full of self- loathing and resolve that I was never to drink again; by 11:00 am, I could feel that resolve beginning to mentally dissolve only to find myself at 3:00 pm planning my glass of Chard when I arrived home at 7:00. I was trapped in a vicious cycle of my own making.
Finally, I arrived at the point where I had had enough; one evening at 7:35 pm (885 days ago), I put that glass down and said "enough; enough; enough". I was tired, broken, defeated.
Stay strong, Mrrryah. Keep posting. I will be here most of the afternoon and into the evening and so will dozens of people who truly want you to succeed. Lean on us.
Finally, I arrived at the point where I had had enough; one evening at 7:35 pm (885 days ago), I put that glass down and said "enough; enough; enough". I was tired, broken, defeated.
Stay strong, Mrrryah. Keep posting. I will be here most of the afternoon and into the evening and so will dozens of people who truly want you to succeed. Lean on us.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 809
I’ve also got this issue in my brain – I know – don’t laugh – it’s so stupid - but it’s “Wine Wednesday”. I used to always say Wine Wednesday was the perfect mid-week break to help get through the Monday-Friday grind of working and monotonous routine…. So for some reason my brain is particularly difficult on Wednesdays. My brain tells me I deserve my “Wine Wednesday”. (The funny thing is though – in addition to Wine Wednesday I would normally drink every single other day too – so the only thing that actually made it different from any other day was the catchy phrase”.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by Mrrryah1
...I know there are plenty of other reasons not to drink but I can’t think of them right now. Every time I think of one my brain immediately comes up with an excuse to match it.
I'm not being flippant.
As long as you try to reason with your addiction, the addiction is going to spin it in its favor.
You've declared your intentions to quit drinking. It's here, in the trenches, where that battle is fought. And it's won with NO.
Wu Wei
Join Date: May 2014
Location: So. California, USA
Posts: 351
I call this desire that you are explaining the desire to be THERE. That place of peace joy and freedom that drinking once brought on. For me, it stopped working. The amount of drink that I need to get THERE makes me sick, even if I can make it too THERE which more times than not I can't.
Instead of living in the desire of doing something that I just can't do I decided to look for other ways to get THERE. For me it is seeing God in all that is around me. Every face I look at I see the face of God. Isn't that a trip? I get to see God everyday in those around me. The peace, joy and freedom is already inside of me I just need to recognize it and embrace it. Once I tried to do it with drink now I get THERE with Love.
Instead of living in the desire of doing something that I just can't do I decided to look for other ways to get THERE. For me it is seeing God in all that is around me. Every face I look at I see the face of God. Isn't that a trip? I get to see God everyday in those around me. The peace, joy and freedom is already inside of me I just need to recognize it and embrace it. Once I tried to do it with drink now I get THERE with Love.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Island Park , NY
Posts: 373
Myrrryah, One of the things I would look at is that you are feeling better! And you should think about your desire to buy a new car, it would behoove you to get a little more time on your journey of sobriety before you buy it. At least in my state if you get caught DWI, they will make you forfeit the car and you still must pay it off if you want to keep your credit! That would be a Major Cravings Killer to me! Keep up the good work we're rooting for you! Stay Strong and Well ! Bobby
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: TN
Posts: 114
Originally Posted by EternalNow
I call this desire that you are explaining the desire to be THERE. That place of peace joy and freedom that drinking once brought on. For me, it stopped working. The amount of drink that I need to get THERE makes me sick, even if I can make it too THERE which more times than not I can't.
Instead of living in the desire of doing something that I just can't do I decided to look for other ways to get THERE. For me it is seeing God in all that is around me. Every face I look at I see the face of God. Isn't that a trip? I get to see God everyday in those around me. The peace, joy and freedom is already inside of me I just need to recognize it and embrace it. Once I tried to do it with drink now I get THERE with Love.
Instead of living in the desire of doing something that I just can't do I decided to look for other ways to get THERE. For me it is seeing God in all that is around me. Every face I look at I see the face of God. Isn't that a trip? I get to see God everyday in those around me. The peace, joy and freedom is already inside of me I just need to recognize it and embrace it. Once I tried to do it with drink now I get THERE with Love.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,380
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
