DefconOne

Happy or sad I drank. In the end it put me in a dark, isolated place, sick inside my depressed mind with my physical health failing. My buddy alcohol had betrayed me. The poison of alcohol left me emotionally and physically battered and bruised. I had hit bottom. Death had become me. If hell had a hole I had found it and fallen in. Then I began my first step in a treatment center and I have been living sober with a plan for the last 60 days. Its one day at a time.

Binnybee

I was drinking because it gave me courage, took away my loneliness and stopped all the spinning worries in my head. I also drank because I was physically dependant on it and if I was one hour late would get anxious, cold, cry and angry. I've been sober nearly a month and it's hard dealing with the reality.

nullnaught

hard question.

mabey a little of both.

Ruby2

Both. I always felt like I didn't fit in so I drank to fit in. To add a little excitement to my life. To take away the pain of feeling awkward. It only temporarily deadened those feelings. Towards the end there I was coming home at lunch to drink. Getting up in the middle of the night to drink. Drinking when I came home from work. In other words, drinking all the time because without alcohol in my system I felt awful physically, mentally and emotionally. I always felt sick and weak. I was always scared I would be caught reeking of alcohol at my job or while I was driving. Or dropping my kids off at school. I was unhappy by then because I drank.

I am still not feeling like I am on top of the world but I don't live with crushing fear anymore and I am slowly learning that it is okay to be me and I am happy with myself, my choices and my life.

erics

Funny, this simple phrase I read in a book is what made it all click. I was unhappy because I drank . Never realized it so powerfully until I saw it written. Now, it's the meme I use for my profile here on SR. 26 months and no going back, one day at a time.

Sydney1988

Hey Dee,

It just came to me. I've had a little binge... I'm not in the best place (not dangerous, but just not great) And It made me think of why I drink. Sometimes I drink because I want to escape and some times I drink because I want to celebrate. But the celebrating always seems to lead to a period of unhappiness.

I guess part of that is what they call a come down. Every high has a low and what goes up must come down yadda yadda.

Just thought I'd ask to see what inspires others to open a bottle.

On the other hand I think it's more of a "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?" type of question. The root of the problem is obvious and is why we're all here.

Dee74

Well in that case I'd have to answer both as well.

I started drinking because I was unhappy - then the drinking made me unhappy...so I drank because I was unhappy...which made me unhappy...

There's only one way to really break a self perpetuating cycle like that and that's to take one of the elements - alcohol - out of the equation

D

Makrellen

True story. Same for me + a bunch of other mental problems

pdoc

Well said Dee.

Same here, that cycle got me until I also removed alcohol from the equation.

Persys

I drank because I am an alcoholic. I've been happy and unhappy, and in both instances I've drank because of it.

JohnnySober99

I think for me drinking became such a habit, and I never really worked to control it. Drinking excessively made me unhappy.. it's a depressant that made me anxious, panicked, and depressed if I drank to any excess. I'm generally a happy person if you take alcohol out of the equation, or at least limit it greatly.

Kieran1988

Both. And it's a vicious cycle for me. I drink cause I know i'm not happy but I'm un happy when I drink. Most of he time I drink to get over the bad things that are happening in my life(IE rejection,which just recently happened, Unemployment etc) but when I start drinking I think about the bad things more so I drink more to stop the pain. It's a vicious cycle.

Chiffon

^^^ this!!

lillyknitting

I definitely drank because: I loved it, and everything socially connected to it. Obviously not the negatives. To me it represented everything associated with good times, parties, fantastic warm cozy feeling with family & friends. It gave me a feeling of a sense of euphoria, freedom from care, boredom & worry. People & parties etc.

I think it's only me that experienced the bad times. My boyfriend (now husband) hated me drinking & it caused terrible, monstrous problems. I thought it was him who had something wrong by being such a bore, party popper and control freak.

I was never, ever unhappy or depressed in any way. Alcohol was a gateway to happy social times, but the negatives outweighed the good.

escapethecycle2

It exasperated negative feelings and helped me distract from them an essentially make them larger. Alcohol has done me zero favors. Thank god for sobriety and freedom!

MelindaFlowers

Drinking made me very happy in the beginning. Almost euphoric. I had fun, relaxing, social evenings every night of the week. Boy, that was a long time ago. I never blacked out and didn't have hangovers. No embarrassing episodes either.

I used and abused that privilege. I don't even need to finish that story.....

In the end I was both unhappy because I drank and drank because I was very sad and sick.

Mac1

As a teenager I didn't drink because I was unhappy - the opposite in fact. But as the years went on, drinking began to 'help' if things weren't going well. And thats how many of us get trapped. The more we drink to escape reality the more we need to drink....
Thankfully I did manage to escape and feel so much happier now

MyTime86

Both but more so when I was unhappy because I wasn't good at dealing with my emotions so I just drink them alway

MavisTheFairy13

I drank to block out things that I couldn't control that were going wrong in my life. Then the drinking didn't help and I needed to drink more. Started at a couple of glasses and ended up at 1.5 bottles of wine and still not getting a buzz from it. What a waste of time energy and money.

MelindaFlowers

Wanted to add one thing. Truly happy and healthy people don't need alcohol to be happy so there was something in me that needed something outside myself to numb something. This makes me think that some people are hard wired to become addicts.