Tetra

I have spent the day by myself. Got up late. Went into town for a bagel and a latte and spent the afternoon browsing in bookshops and walking through the park.

I used to hate myself for being so quiet. And I always thought that I had to be someone else. And I drank and drank and it nearly destroyed me.

And then I gave up the drink and I began to realise that I am a good person. I spent some time teaching English as a foreign language and my students seemed to enjoy my classes. One of the Indian guys told me that I am a kind person.

My sister is a doctor, works long hours. She eats a lot of junk food. She loves sweet things. She was sick one night and I leaned over to wipe her forehead with a cool cloth and she looked at me and said "the world would be a much softer place if more people were like you".

I was in Starbucks earlier today and this dishevelled looking guy came in and plonked himself down beside me. He looked at my giant cookie and said "that looks great! Would you mind if I had a taste? " I was a bit taken aback until I looked into his eyes. His pupils were dilated and his forehead was sweating badly. So I cut the cookie in half and gave it to him. He kept calling me a star. We had a brief chat and he told me that he usually goes to the homeless shelter for food but it is closed on bank holiday Monday. Then a Starbucks staff member came over and asked him to leave and he started shouting that working for a corporation like Starbucks is stupid.

That could be me if I didn't get sober.

Croissant

What a sweet post.

Have a lovely day!

Seanfox

I think It's great that you enjoy your own company, people think I'm weird because I like going to the cinema by myself.

RazaR

I enjoy my own company as well. At least I don't argue with myself that often but when I do I always realize that I'm right ;-)

I'm my own best friend... others just tend to irritate me.

PurpleKnight

Great Post!!

Tetra

Well, I have always believed in respect for others. Just lately I have started to have respect for myself.

On a separate topic, when I was growing up, I wanted to be a nurse, not a teacher. But my Grandad (R.I.P.) lost the plot altogether when I told him that I guess because my aunt spent years working as an army nurse...

Oldselfagain

Good stuff Tetra!

Verte

Anyone would be lucky to have you has a friend, daughter, sister...

Thanks for making the world a better place Tetra.

least

Nothing wrong with enjoying your own company. I do.

bigsombrero

I remember being alone, standing out on a deserted beach on a small island in the Indian Ocean. No humans around for miles, just the monkeys and the fish and the birds. I have repeated that in a few other corners of the globe and it gets better each time. I don't think that's weird, I think that's cool.

You are sober, alert, and not harming yourself or others with your actions. You are a kind person and helpful and polite to those you meet. If someone thinks that your behavior is "odd"....then that's their problem! As long as you are happy, that is all that matters.

Aellyce

I think it's a positive trait if someone is able to enjoy their own company, not be disturbed by spending time alone, and can find interesting and stimulating healthy solo activities. That is different from social isolation and escape that often characterize active addiction.

I'm a quite introverted person myself and really need my alone time, but equally enjoy intense interactions with a select few people or like-minded groups, especially if I feel that I can bring something into their lives and enrich their experience.

You have good reasons to be proud of yourself and be happy with who you have become as a sober person!

Ruby2

I think that it's great that you enjoy your own company. You sound like a very lovely person.

It took me a very long time to realize that it is okay to be alone and not be lonely. But now I treasure that time because I don't get it very much.

soberclover

Now that I'm sober I find that I actually like spending time by myself; less drama. It sounds like you too, like I, am starting to figure out who I am....the sober person I am meant to be

Tetra

Thank you all <3

Hevyn

I think we're in trouble if we don't enjoy being alone. I definitely do. I enjoyed your post Tetra - you are growing and changing so much. Things are going to keep getting better.

comingoutsober

I enjoy my own company as well, and fell into a similar trap of drinking alone. I've always struggled with social anxiety too though, and I've gone too far to the introverted end of the spectrum, but I'm working on that too!

I'm so happy you're cultivating your sense of contentment with yourself! Keep up the good work

Johnston

I consider my introversion a blessing. Whether we like it or not, that final journey into eternity will be a solo act.

Johnston

MST3k...you rock!

instant

I like occupying myself. I think i used alcohol for turning off for a while, or making me less anxious in social situations when younger. i think part of the journey of sobriety is to learn about and accept who we are

KAD

Great post! It has only been through sobriety that I have not only learned to enjoy my own company, but to actually feel love for myself. That's where healing begins.