Back In These Rooms
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 4
Back In These Rooms
Hello Everyone! Thank you for being so welcoming!
After being "out" for seven years, I am back on the road to the life I want to have. I originally entered these rooms as a young woman, under the influence of family to seek help for binge drinking. I attended an inpatient rehab program for 30 days, and outpatient for 60 days. I then worked the steps outside of that comfort zone for an additional 90 days. That was the longest I have been able to achieve sobriety...a little over 6 months. At that point I led myself to believe that I could "learn to drink like a gentleman", have a couple beers once a week and be okay. And I did just that. For a couple of years in fact. Then about five years ago, the binge drinking began once again. At that point. I had never been an everyday drinker, I blatantly drank to excess. Blackouts were an every weekend occurrence, yet I managed to keep my life in order. I achieved a bachelor's degree, scored a decent job and have never been in trouble with the law.
However, it was only a matter of time, and over the past year I have been a daily drinker. Sure its only a glass of red wine, or a bottle of beer...but it was everyday and still having blackouts every weekend. After multiple embarrassments and horrible decisions, I was back on the recovery road. 30 days sober...then my booze brain started telling me I could moderate...sure no problem!! I learned my lesson this time! Yeah right, within a month I was back at it.
So here I am, after having a moment of clarity in the depths of yet another debilitating hangover...that I am just done living my life that way. I can't recall many important events, or people...I am missing out on my own life.
Today is day five, and believe me it was the worst so far. The booze brain was in full force today..."C'mon! You can just stop on your way home and grab a bottle of wine and have just a glass! You've proved you're not an alcoholic, you obviously aren't physically addicted!" I had to shut her up by diving into the Big Book.
Any who, I just wanted to say 'Howdy!" and that I am truly grateful for having this resource available at my fingertips! Have a wonderful rest of your week everyone!!
After being "out" for seven years, I am back on the road to the life I want to have. I originally entered these rooms as a young woman, under the influence of family to seek help for binge drinking. I attended an inpatient rehab program for 30 days, and outpatient for 60 days. I then worked the steps outside of that comfort zone for an additional 90 days. That was the longest I have been able to achieve sobriety...a little over 6 months. At that point I led myself to believe that I could "learn to drink like a gentleman", have a couple beers once a week and be okay. And I did just that. For a couple of years in fact. Then about five years ago, the binge drinking began once again. At that point. I had never been an everyday drinker, I blatantly drank to excess. Blackouts were an every weekend occurrence, yet I managed to keep my life in order. I achieved a bachelor's degree, scored a decent job and have never been in trouble with the law.
However, it was only a matter of time, and over the past year I have been a daily drinker. Sure its only a glass of red wine, or a bottle of beer...but it was everyday and still having blackouts every weekend. After multiple embarrassments and horrible decisions, I was back on the recovery road. 30 days sober...then my booze brain started telling me I could moderate...sure no problem!! I learned my lesson this time! Yeah right, within a month I was back at it.
So here I am, after having a moment of clarity in the depths of yet another debilitating hangover...that I am just done living my life that way. I can't recall many important events, or people...I am missing out on my own life.
Today is day five, and believe me it was the worst so far. The booze brain was in full force today..."C'mon! You can just stop on your way home and grab a bottle of wine and have just a glass! You've proved you're not an alcoholic, you obviously aren't physically addicted!" I had to shut her up by diving into the Big Book.
Any who, I just wanted to say 'Howdy!" and that I am truly grateful for having this resource available at my fingertips! Have a wonderful rest of your week everyone!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 1,372
Welcome MsMcGillicuddy. You'll find a lot of support here.
And thank you for your post, I've just hit the 6 month mark and you gave me a good reminder about staying vigilant and not believing "that voice" no matter how much time has passed. Welcome and congrats on 5 days!
And thank you for your post, I've just hit the 6 month mark and you gave me a good reminder about staying vigilant and not believing "that voice" no matter how much time has passed. Welcome and congrats on 5 days!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
Welcome to the forum MsM--I can tell you from my own experience that it does get easier over time.
I had the most problem with cravings and temptations the first 6-8 months and then it began to slow down.
You will feel better and not have to worry about what you said or did drinking.
These are wonderful benefits too. . .
Keep posting
I had the most problem with cravings and temptations the first 6-8 months and then it began to slow down.
You will feel better and not have to worry about what you said or did drinking.
These are wonderful benefits too. . .
Keep posting
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Welcome MsM. Your post is a valuable one for undisciplined newcomers like me way back when. It shows so clearly and so often what happens when we stop going to meetings and do thing our way instead of following what historically will work when we work it.
BE WELL
BE WELL
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