anykey

If I had to do it again- I would not have stayed on anti depressents longer then a few months. My brain is forever altered- I tried 6x to stop the meds and it is impossible.

The worst of my depression is when I had court dates. Basically the court issues had to resolve before the depression would lessen.

I regret that I am on SSRIs. I should have stopped after a few months. I will be on them the rest of my life.

snowflake74

Anykey, I hear you. Hindsight is always 20/20. I've got the same dilemma. I've been on klonopin for 17 years. I tried the most sophistocated doctor-supervised taper plan involved a withdrawal over the course of 48 months (!!!) The drug is THAT powerful, but I suffered the entire two years I was tapering. I was down to quartering the pills and reducing one quarter for two weeks and I STILL suffered (far worse than coming off of opiates now). So I threw in the towel and went back on. And I will be on it for the rest of my life. The good news is, the klonopin does not cause a problem in my life and thus I'm dependent on it but not addicted. I don't abuse it and never have, and always been on a relatively low dose.

Anykey, other than regret that your stuck on them, does the SSRI cause you problems? Was the a reason you wanted off, other than feeling dependent on it?

anykey

When the govt passed TARP- I felt that a currency collapse was coming. So to prepare I wanted to stock pile meds, and get off of those that are not needed. Also- I read that effexxor has a fluoride base. I wont drink water with fluoride in it.

Now get this- I did manage to reduce my dose from 225 mg to 150 mg- my psychiatrist scolded and punished me. He yelled that I did not have his permission to change the dose. I know from working in group homes- that patients have the right to the least effective dose.

The med does not give me a buzz. With out it tho- I can not connect my thoughts- for instance- if my shoe was untied I would fret and be sad over it- instead of simply tieing my shoe.

I fired my Dr when he got this outburst.

My regular Dr covers now those medications. I am on 11 medications. 3 for blood pressure- one for thyroid, one for prostrate, 2 for depression, 2 pain pills- one of which is opiate- a sleeping pill and an ADD pill.

If society went into martial law- I cant be chasing medications when simply eating would be a task.

I have tried to reduce further from the 150 mg. But I have no luck. If they ever cut off that pill I would flat out be suicidal. On the other pills- I could get by- maybe- but not on the SSRI.

I also read that SSRIs in high doses can effect eye sight. My eyes have declined- and the eye dr thought I had diabetes. I am not sure my blood sugar is stable.

My regular Dr chalked that up to a bad thyroid.

snowflake74

You remind me of that show, "Doomsday Preppers" lol. I can relate. I have an urge to stockpile the opiates I'm trying to get off of - to keep refilling my remaining prescriptions even though I'd be clean from them. There is something strangely comforting about having a stockpile of the drug in my cabinet that is ruining my life. It's sounds crazy and I know it's a bad idea. The last time I tried to quit I destroyed my stockpile. Then when I went back on, I was mad at myself for having to start from scratch and not having a buffer. Does that mean I'm preparing for a relapse? I don't know. I think part of me wants to have it on-hand in case I need it for a legitimate reason like I break my arm or something. But I also realize this is probably a huge rationalization. And perhaps I'll change my mind as I get nearer to sobriety.

Aellyce

Hi Makrellen,

I definitely had depression, some periods worse others lighter, often actually pushing myself deeper into it either with obsessive thinking or alcohol abuse. Never sought professional help. Until right now, when I'm actually not really depressed, just want to work more on my issues.

I do recommend that you seek help. If you are in acute crisis and despair, I would suggest the ER. If not that serious, perhaps the best way to start is to go see a general doctor, tell them about your problems honestly. If you have not had a physical for a while, probably a good idea to have one. Then depending on results and recommendation, you can decide whether you want to see a psychiatrist or a therapist for longer term help.

I let myself "play" with depressive states far too much, and with all the help and treatment options available today I think it's a useless exercise, we can waste so much time...

Again, perhaps the easiest start is to see a primary care doctor if it's not a crisis situation.

jaynie04

What works for one may not work for another. There are many, many variables that go into finding the right script.

Each person doses differently and each person withdraws differently, and different meds have different effects at different doses. Some meds are actually more potent at lower doses. I freaked myself out about detoxing from benzos after 10 years, I did so under medical supervision in two weeks. My doctor said wryly "no more Google for you".

Mak, if you are suffering from depression that doesn't ease as you continue with your sobriety, I would highly recommend seeing a doctor. No one online knows your complete medical history or all of your particular issues.

I do believe that it is time well spent to find a doctor who is empathetic and who understands addiction.