Gakx

I work hard to make a weekly plan of events/goals to accomplish and this really helps keep me on track. I tend to overload myself so that I do not have down time for thoughts of drinking or anything else for that matter. This planning has been very successful for me and I find pride in my accomplishments.

I am quickly triggered when someone interjects in my plan of action and gives me more to add to my list of things to do. I do not like surprises or being given a task that is due ASAP. Why is it that people wait until the last minute to ask for something to get done?

I have always been a "planner" even with drinking. I know that this is all just a part of life but it can feel like sabotage. I am able to function with a healthy amount of stress, but gosh darn it, I start to lose it with those higher stress levels and the feeling of immediacy. I plan ahead and take care of things before they are due, why can't other folks be better prepared.

And if they only knew... relying on a recovering addict/alcoholic to get things done, scary thought. Am I setting myself up for failure with all of this?

FeelingGreat

Hi Gakx, there are people who plan and don't like deviating from the plan. I really admire them because they get a lot done. A downside is that they are less flexible than more scatterbrained people like me. Workplaces really benefit from a mix of personalities where some are at the creative end of the spectrum and others are achievers. There's lots of information on the internet about this topic.

In your situation where you're not able to completely control your work schedule, I'd suggest thinking about some strategies you can use when you're given unplanned work. One idea might be to take 10 minutes away from your desk calm down and think about how you're going to handle the new job, maybe write down some bullet points.

When you have a discussion with your boss, you might highlight your strengths in planning and strategy, rather than handling new and stressful situations.

Gottalife

Pages 60'61'62 come to mind. "All would be utopia if only the rest of the world behaved"

" is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction from this life if only he manages well"

People have feet of clay. They will always let you down sooner or later. It is important to realise that our sobriety does not depend upon the actions of others.

Rar

I know what you mean. I am not so much of a planner now, but before I retired I structured my work day. If something unplanned happen it added more work to my already full day and stressed me to the max as I rushed to complete the tasks I assigned to myself. What about allotting or assigning a section for "unknown".

Gakx

Thanks guys. I do know that my sobriety is not based on others Gottalife, good point. I am more worried about self-sabotage.

Rar and FeelingGreat, at this stage of the game, it is the downtime, at work or home, that I fear. I have not been sober long enough to relax. Relaxing is a dangerous concept for me...it leads to drinking.

I think I am more just ranting but you guys nailed it. I want total control of my life and that kind of totalitarianistic thinking is just not conducive with the reality of life.

FeelingGreat

It's way better to be a bit over-vigilant that to be careless and too confident. A bit of planning and preparing can help you with difficult situations, and I'm sure it will even out in time. Give yourself a big pat on the back!

FeelingGreat

PS what is your avatar?

Tang

I believe that avatar is from the video game Elder Scrolls IV.

My job regularly asks me to drop my plan and jump all over someone else's. Work stress definitely is a trigger. Working with sales people I've come to realize they are the most scattered chaotic disruptive force in my life.

FeelingGreat

Lol, don't get me started. They're also the most unrealistically optimistic people when it comes to sales forecasts.

biminiblue

I totally should go into sales.



"A Plan" sounds like torture to me. I am the original Free Spirit. I don't wear Birkensotcks, but only because I do shower and they are gross. I rarely plan further than tomorrow - unless it's absolutely necessary. You know, like a vacation, or an important appointment.

My time is not scheduled down to the last minute. THAT would make me drink. Free time restores my soul.

I thrive on the feather in the breeze mode. Don't tie me down, don't give me too many rules. I pay my bills on time and my taxes, but only because I'm a law-abiding hippie.

Takes all kinds. I love that other people want to take on the planning. I'll help, I just don't like the added stress. I'll be the worker drone.

doggonecarl

You are kind of creating the conflict. You say you overload yourself so you don't have any down time (and hence, drink). Yet when someone adds to your overloaded "plan" it triggers you.

If you are going to make everyone else's urgent requests your No. 1 priority, then you need to leave room in your plan to account for these "unplanned" tasks.

Or else prioritize them according to your plan. Meaning, someone's urgent request doesn't mean you have to make it your urgent task.

LBrain

the avatar looks like a type of beetle - just a guess.

Well Gakx, sounds like you thrive on efficiency. But gosh darn it - sounds like Butters - the rest of the world doesn't. Aside from all of the positive things you do and thanks for the reminder - don't let something simple upset the cart. When someone hands you something to be done ASAP, find out when THEY found out. A simple, "When did you discover this needed to be done?" should suffice. Then assess the task and give a timeline based on your experience + 25%. Under promise and over deliver. ASAP doesn't mean NOW, it means as soon as possible. If it takes 8 hours then it takes 8 hours. I used to get all caught up in that too. My favorite answer from the task masters when asked when it needs to be done has always been, "Yesterday."
Well it aint yesterday no more...

Hang in there, you are an inspiration. You just gotta learn to pace yourself.

Raider

I'm a planner also. I understand. I wish I was more of a feather in the wind girl as mentioned. But sadly, I am not.

Gakx

Tang is correct, the avatar is from Elder Scrolls...a video game. Yep, super dork, right here, in the flesh.

I appreciate the good advice here and to see that others have learned ways of handling the ASAPs that seem to come up. I need to be more assertive when asked to take on those last minute tasks. Maybe I could back off somewhat on what I "think" I have to get done and as suggested, pace myself a little better.

biminiblue, I am fascinated by the free spirits. It would seem a lifestyle that would allow for healing of the soul and mind. My go, go, go attitude is who I am and how I stay highly functional but you are a good reminder that sometimes, we need "me" time.