I hope I can do this...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: PA
Posts: 3
I hope I can do this...
I have been a marijuana smoker for the last 20 years. For the past 7 years, I have smoked every day, 3 - 4 times a day. I started smoking when my father died, actually the first time was the day of his viewing. I continued to smoke to handle life's downs for me. Now I am in a place in my life where I should be happy. Life is good to me. My dreams have been answered and I adopted a beautiful child. Since that day, all my attemps to stop have gone up in smoke. I get so sad and depressed and I start to hate the person I have become. It has always lead me back to smoking again. I read somewhere that smokers take 10-15 years off their life. That scared the daylights out of me. I look into my child's eye's and I want to change. I have never gotten so stoned that I can't take care of my child, I always felt like smoking made me more relaxed, more fun to be around. I know my child deserves better then this. I deserve a chance to live life without having to turn to a mood changer to help me deal with problems. I refuse to go into a treatment program because I am scared someone will take my child away from me.
So 3 weeks ago, I quit for good. My husband is being very supportive of this, for the first time, he realizes I have a serious problem. There are moments when I feel proud that I have gone 3 weeks, longer then I've ever gone before, but there are also times, like right now, where I am so depressed, so sad, so down on my life.
There was a time marijuana worked for me. I was able to work 3 jobs and put myself thru college and I graduated on the Dean's list. It gave me energy but now, since I have my child and tried to quit, I feel trapped. I thought it would be easier to stop but I was wrong.
Has anyone been in similiar shoe's? How long does the depression last? I went to the doctors and told him I was depressed, but not the reason why and he gave me a prescription for some type of drug that he said would help me, but I can't take it. I don't want to substitute one fix for another. I want to be free. I want to like myself again. I wish I never started smoking. I never tried any other drugs. I didn't think marijuana was addicting. Now I know, that physically, it may not be, but mentally, oh gosh, mentally, it definitely is.
Again, I feel so depressed, I lack any type of energy to do the simple things I used to love such as gardening, tending to my flowers and cooking. It takes all I have right now to keep even keel, to keep my child happy without me yelling, to get the child up and dressed each day and take the child outside so they can play.
When will I start to feel better, does anyone have any idea?
So 3 weeks ago, I quit for good. My husband is being very supportive of this, for the first time, he realizes I have a serious problem. There are moments when I feel proud that I have gone 3 weeks, longer then I've ever gone before, but there are also times, like right now, where I am so depressed, so sad, so down on my life.
There was a time marijuana worked for me. I was able to work 3 jobs and put myself thru college and I graduated on the Dean's list. It gave me energy but now, since I have my child and tried to quit, I feel trapped. I thought it would be easier to stop but I was wrong.
Has anyone been in similiar shoe's? How long does the depression last? I went to the doctors and told him I was depressed, but not the reason why and he gave me a prescription for some type of drug that he said would help me, but I can't take it. I don't want to substitute one fix for another. I want to be free. I want to like myself again. I wish I never started smoking. I never tried any other drugs. I didn't think marijuana was addicting. Now I know, that physically, it may not be, but mentally, oh gosh, mentally, it definitely is.
Again, I feel so depressed, I lack any type of energy to do the simple things I used to love such as gardening, tending to my flowers and cooking. It takes all I have right now to keep even keel, to keep my child happy without me yelling, to get the child up and dressed each day and take the child outside so they can play.
When will I start to feel better, does anyone have any idea?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
Hi 2Bseen
I'm Rowan, I'm an alcoholic. I never was a heavy pot smoker, so I can't identify,
but I can identify with the depression, and how endless it seems when you are mired
in it. This board is full of wonderful people who can offer support and hope, through
their own experiences. I just wanted to say hang in there and that I'm glad you're
here.
Love, Rowan
I'm Rowan, I'm an alcoholic. I never was a heavy pot smoker, so I can't identify,
but I can identify with the depression, and how endless it seems when you are mired
in it. This board is full of wonderful people who can offer support and hope, through
their own experiences. I just wanted to say hang in there and that I'm glad you're
here.
Love, Rowan
OH SH!T
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: RICHMOND,VIRGINIA-
Posts: 1,655
HEY 2B GLAD YOUR HERE.I'M TED ALCOHOLIC/ADDICT.
I SMOKED POT ALMOST DAILY FOR 25 YEARS,AMONG OTHER THINGS.
IT IS HARD,BUT IT CAN AND IS DONE EVERYDAY.
I WOULD SUGGEST TRYING A NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS MEETING,
PEOPLE JUST LIKE YOU THAT FOUND A WAY NOT TO USE,ONE DAY AT A TIME.
STICK AROUND LOTS OF GREAT PEOPLE HERE TO SUPPORT YOU................ted
I SMOKED POT ALMOST DAILY FOR 25 YEARS,AMONG OTHER THINGS.
IT IS HARD,BUT IT CAN AND IS DONE EVERYDAY.
I WOULD SUGGEST TRYING A NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS MEETING,
PEOPLE JUST LIKE YOU THAT FOUND A WAY NOT TO USE,ONE DAY AT A TIME.
STICK AROUND LOTS OF GREAT PEOPLE HERE TO SUPPORT YOU................ted
Down to Earth Astronaut
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Providence, RI
Posts: 7
Hi 2BSeen.
I just posted my first yesterday. I am an alcoholic, been sober for 21 days. In my experience, addictions are mentally challangeing. One thing to remember is never to give up hope. Do not let your past experiences cloud your judgement and future aspirations. Be thankful for everyday, every hour, and every minute of the day. You have a beautiful child to focus all your love and attention to. I was suggested this approach to depression from coming off using: there are three steps...1st is to identify the emotion you are feeling, 2nd - look at what led you to that emotion (arguement, not enjoying the things you used to, etc...) question that event, and 3rd - find a way to overcome that emotion (immerse yourself in your passions). Sounds pretty simple but I know it's harder to follow through. Also this advice thing is new to me and hard to put in words.
I'm not going to give up and you shouldn't either! There will be days of sadness, but those of joy will far exceed those and will become easier to acheive as time goes on. I am looking around at these posts and there are great people out there! Talk and post around here anytime about anything. I know I am going to.
I just posted my first yesterday. I am an alcoholic, been sober for 21 days. In my experience, addictions are mentally challangeing. One thing to remember is never to give up hope. Do not let your past experiences cloud your judgement and future aspirations. Be thankful for everyday, every hour, and every minute of the day. You have a beautiful child to focus all your love and attention to. I was suggested this approach to depression from coming off using: there are three steps...1st is to identify the emotion you are feeling, 2nd - look at what led you to that emotion (arguement, not enjoying the things you used to, etc...) question that event, and 3rd - find a way to overcome that emotion (immerse yourself in your passions). Sounds pretty simple but I know it's harder to follow through. Also this advice thing is new to me and hard to put in words.
I'm not going to give up and you shouldn't either! There will be days of sadness, but those of joy will far exceed those and will become easier to acheive as time goes on. I am looking around at these posts and there are great people out there! Talk and post around here anytime about anything. I know I am going to.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
Hi 2Bseen,
Welcome!
I can't give you info about marijuana because I'm an alcoholic, but I would like to wish you well in your recovery and support you in the choice you made. I would express one caution about the antidepressant - I am clinically depressed and have taken antidepressants for a few years. When I stop there is no effect, except I become depressed again. Don't eliminate antidepressants as substituting one drug for another. Some of have a chemical imbalance which medication corrects. But, in your case the depression may stop when you stop the marijuana.
Keep posting.
Love, Anna
Welcome!
I can't give you info about marijuana because I'm an alcoholic, but I would like to wish you well in your recovery and support you in the choice you made. I would express one caution about the antidepressant - I am clinically depressed and have taken antidepressants for a few years. When I stop there is no effect, except I become depressed again. Don't eliminate antidepressants as substituting one drug for another. Some of have a chemical imbalance which medication corrects. But, in your case the depression may stop when you stop the marijuana.
Keep posting.
Love, Anna
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: western canada
Posts: 1,441
Hey 2B...
It's a new day... and a new way...
Emotions are just energy... and we can choose to feed that energy with more of the same thoughts... or we can acknowledge the emotion... sit tight and feel it.. and then witness it evaporate.
Many of us in recovery have spent our lives running from our own minds... but the really ironic thing is that we can choose WHAT to think with a little practice... and the actions just follow along.
That's why I attend 12 step meetings. It helps me identify what areas of my thinking are causing me problems.. and it offers me the solution at the same time.
If you can't bring yourself to a face to face meeting... there are numerous resources on the web that can help as well.
You seem to instinctively know that putting pot between yourself and your child is going to negate much of the possibilities with her...
....trust that.
May the Creator strengthen your resolve to continue on your new path... and bless you with clarity and patience with yourself and your new family.
It's a new day... and a new way...
Emotions are just energy... and we can choose to feed that energy with more of the same thoughts... or we can acknowledge the emotion... sit tight and feel it.. and then witness it evaporate.
Many of us in recovery have spent our lives running from our own minds... but the really ironic thing is that we can choose WHAT to think with a little practice... and the actions just follow along.
That's why I attend 12 step meetings. It helps me identify what areas of my thinking are causing me problems.. and it offers me the solution at the same time.
If you can't bring yourself to a face to face meeting... there are numerous resources on the web that can help as well.
You seem to instinctively know that putting pot between yourself and your child is going to negate much of the possibilities with her...
....trust that.
May the Creator strengthen your resolve to continue on your new path... and bless you with clarity and patience with yourself and your new family.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: The Mohave Desert
Posts: 2,306
Hi 2B
Welcome to SoberRecovery...
Like the others have said, it will take some time for your body to adjust without it's drug of choice.
I also would not rule out the possibility of taking an anti-deppresant.
See how you feel in another few weeks and if things are not starting to get better, do not feel that you are giving up one drug for another.
I suffer from depression and have to take some med's to keep me from feeling way too depressed.
You also have this place to come to and hang out. read the posts, especially those in the NA forums.
Ask questions...we are here for you...
Welcome to SoberRecovery...
Like the others have said, it will take some time for your body to adjust without it's drug of choice.
I also would not rule out the possibility of taking an anti-deppresant.
See how you feel in another few weeks and if things are not starting to get better, do not feel that you are giving up one drug for another.
I suffer from depression and have to take some med's to keep me from feeling way too depressed.
You also have this place to come to and hang out. read the posts, especially those in the NA forums.
Ask questions...we are here for you...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: PA
Posts: 3
thanks
Thank you everyone for your support, encouagement and tips. I'm trying to follow the advice of everyone, especially abnormalego, to identify my feelings and understand where they are coming from. It is helping.
Tomorrow is my 1 month mark. I still don't feel much pride that I made it this far. I feel too close to slidding back still and each day is a challenge. I'm staying away from the friends that used to smoke with me and trying to keep busy doing things with my child. The child deserves a mother that is fully there and not an addict. The depression is still there, but at times, I can feel myself almost coming out of it, at least for alittle while. I guess the cloud is lifting some. I'll keep in mind the anti-depressants if I can't get out of this depression in a few weeks.
Finding this board has been so helpful. When I feel weak, I come here read these replies and then start scanning the boards for encouargement. My friends don't really think I should give my marijuana up. They are trying to tell me that it's not addicting and such. I can't argue with what they say, but all I can do is tell them, for me, it was. When you start smoking it first thing in the morning and continue all day, then that means you have a problem. When you can't stop and you don't want to be without it, then you have a problem. I know I can't handle it anymore. It does something to me. I know, I need to stay away from it, if I ever want a chance at a full and satisfying life and not be a drug addicted mother. The irony of it all that hits me in my gut is my child's mother placed because she had a drug problem. I can't, no I won't, allow her choice in me to be a mistake. She wanted to save her child from having an addicted mother. This child deserves better and so does the woman who placed the child. I won't ever be able to look the child's birth mother in the eye if I know, deep down, I'm an addict also. I swear, I'm going to do it this time. Hugs everyone, 1 month down and the rest of my life to go...
Tomorrow is my 1 month mark. I still don't feel much pride that I made it this far. I feel too close to slidding back still and each day is a challenge. I'm staying away from the friends that used to smoke with me and trying to keep busy doing things with my child. The child deserves a mother that is fully there and not an addict. The depression is still there, but at times, I can feel myself almost coming out of it, at least for alittle while. I guess the cloud is lifting some. I'll keep in mind the anti-depressants if I can't get out of this depression in a few weeks.
Finding this board has been so helpful. When I feel weak, I come here read these replies and then start scanning the boards for encouargement. My friends don't really think I should give my marijuana up. They are trying to tell me that it's not addicting and such. I can't argue with what they say, but all I can do is tell them, for me, it was. When you start smoking it first thing in the morning and continue all day, then that means you have a problem. When you can't stop and you don't want to be without it, then you have a problem. I know I can't handle it anymore. It does something to me. I know, I need to stay away from it, if I ever want a chance at a full and satisfying life and not be a drug addicted mother. The irony of it all that hits me in my gut is my child's mother placed because she had a drug problem. I can't, no I won't, allow her choice in me to be a mistake. She wanted to save her child from having an addicted mother. This child deserves better and so does the woman who placed the child. I won't ever be able to look the child's birth mother in the eye if I know, deep down, I'm an addict also. I swear, I'm going to do it this time. Hugs everyone, 1 month down and the rest of my life to go...
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: El Paso, Tx
Posts: 5,862
Hi 2Bseen!
Welcome to SR! Your addiction, despite the belief pot is non-addictive by some, is very real. There are more and more people visiting because of marijuana abuse. So your in the right place, you'll find a lot of support. It would be a good idea to find a means of support in your area as well. Throuh NA, a counselor, spiritual advisor, most of us couldn't do it alone.
BTW, Congrats on 3 weeks it's an awesome start, and if you so choose, you never have to light up again!
Welcome to SR! Your addiction, despite the belief pot is non-addictive by some, is very real. There are more and more people visiting because of marijuana abuse. So your in the right place, you'll find a lot of support. It would be a good idea to find a means of support in your area as well. Throuh NA, a counselor, spiritual advisor, most of us couldn't do it alone.
BTW, Congrats on 3 weeks it's an awesome start, and if you so choose, you never have to light up again!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Southern California
Posts: 129
Hi to 2b,
I have smoked over 20 years and been in treatment for Marijuana Abuse and depression..Been on meds for the depression..
First I am so proud of you...you set a example for me to follow. I am only at day 5. I have been thinking and knowing that I shall stop but keep putting it off..until I found this place and found others who also are addicted to pot. Thats when I decided to do it. I was anxious and had insomia..and cried easily..but I had a great day yesterday with my grandaughter. I love the post about emotions by bikewrench..Sometimes feelings seem to be overpowering..and I have make really offf the wall decidions based on my over-reacting to these emotions..when if I had sawt the advise of a sponsor and advise as is seen at this site..maybe I wouldn't have gone off half-cocked.
Are you seeing a therapist? I have found the use of anti-depressants to be very useful. I didn't get high from them so I didn't feel I was subst one drug for another. But I know what you mean by being resistance to taking them.
Your hb being supportive is most important.
The friends who smoke with you probalby don't mean to undermine you, but maybe in denial theyselfs. This is the first time in my years of smoking where I am actually talking to other potheads who do I my problem and are talking about it. To me this is a blessing and a mircle. You are at the right place here. Where I came from we have meetings for Mariquana Addicts called Mariquana Ananoious (sp)..MA..maybe you have some in your area or could see about starting one as you are very educated and motived. We MA people do need support from others like us..as we all know "Mariquana is not addicting" is a most prevailing attidute..out there.
Okay..didn't mean to put any extra presure on you with the "maybe you could start one" statement..sorry... I am so excited to find others like me..who are trying to quit for ever this incidious desease. I am awed by the support found here and the wisdom and beautiful concepts and heartwarming statements. Guess I stop posting for a while so others can respond. Do look forward to sharing our recovery issues and hopes . In my thoughts...and prayers..love randa
I have smoked over 20 years and been in treatment for Marijuana Abuse and depression..Been on meds for the depression..
First I am so proud of you...you set a example for me to follow. I am only at day 5. I have been thinking and knowing that I shall stop but keep putting it off..until I found this place and found others who also are addicted to pot. Thats when I decided to do it. I was anxious and had insomia..and cried easily..but I had a great day yesterday with my grandaughter. I love the post about emotions by bikewrench..Sometimes feelings seem to be overpowering..and I have make really offf the wall decidions based on my over-reacting to these emotions..when if I had sawt the advise of a sponsor and advise as is seen at this site..maybe I wouldn't have gone off half-cocked.
Are you seeing a therapist? I have found the use of anti-depressants to be very useful. I didn't get high from them so I didn't feel I was subst one drug for another. But I know what you mean by being resistance to taking them.
Your hb being supportive is most important.
The friends who smoke with you probalby don't mean to undermine you, but maybe in denial theyselfs. This is the first time in my years of smoking where I am actually talking to other potheads who do I my problem and are talking about it. To me this is a blessing and a mircle. You are at the right place here. Where I came from we have meetings for Mariquana Addicts called Mariquana Ananoious (sp)..MA..maybe you have some in your area or could see about starting one as you are very educated and motived. We MA people do need support from others like us..as we all know "Mariquana is not addicting" is a most prevailing attidute..out there.
Okay..didn't mean to put any extra presure on you with the "maybe you could start one" statement..sorry... I am so excited to find others like me..who are trying to quit for ever this incidious desease. I am awed by the support found here and the wisdom and beautiful concepts and heartwarming statements. Guess I stop posting for a while so others can respond. Do look forward to sharing our recovery issues and hopes . In my thoughts...and prayers..love randa
Paused
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Anytown, USA
Posts: 101
welcome. i am audra and on my 6th day sober from pot. reading your post helped me. i am going thru exact same thing. very annoyed with my kids and find myself yelling at them. wanted to smoke pot today to chill out and be cooler to them, but instead left to take a drive for a few. can not sleep but 3 to 4 hours a night and am used to getting soooo much more. not sure of any advice, as i am looking for some myself. lots of prayer got me to where i am today. counselor, meds might help. i used to be on them but they don't mix well with pot, so i gave up the meds instead of my drug. hope you find some peace here. everyone is great.
audra
congrats on your one month. very impressive!!!!
audra
congrats on your one month. very impressive!!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: PA
Posts: 3
Lizzy and needtogrow up...
Wow, so glad I found someone else who has the same problem I have. Also thank you everyone else for your support and wisdom. It is so very helpful to me right now.
First I wanted to address Lizzy and needtogrowup. The first 2 weeks were the hardest. I had the crying spells, the mood swings, the I hate myself like this symdrome, I would yell at my child and then feel like I'm a terrible mother and want to smoke so I would feel better and not yell. I couldn't sleep, I lost weight, all I could think about was smoking. I did what you did and when I couldn't handle it anymore, I went for a drive. That helped me get out of the house. I don't have a support system in place other then my husband and at times, I've hated him for this but now I understand where he is coming from. Today as he was leaving for work and I was feeling weak, he took out his wallet and handed me a picture of our child. He said put that in your pocket, use it like an AA card. When you feel weak, pull out the picture and remember why you are doing this. It's a neat idea and did take the edge off my first craving this morning.
I've seen that MA has meetings online and I'm hoping to check it out this week. As far as attending a meeting, such as NA, I've heard that they don't take marijuana addiction very seriously and some have found no support there. My husband thinks I should go to a therapist so I can talk to someone, but again, with our adoption and hoping to adopt one more child, I just can't bring myself to go and talk to someone without the fear of a backlash coming to me.
I do have one friend, who is very spiritual who I see about once a month. We help keep each other on track with our New Years resolution lists. Last year was the first year, I actually did what I said. I told her, years ago that I quit but now, at our next meeting, I will be fully honest with her so that I can have her as a support system also. I picked up the book on Rational Recovery and find the book interesting. I don't know if I can buy into it yet, but it makes sense and of course, it deals with no meetings. I know the chance of relapse is greater without a support system so I'm working on that and try to open myself up to different avenue's. Maybe I could try a NA meeting in the evening while my husband is at home to watch the baby.
In the meantime, this board is EXTREMLY helpful. I am thankful for each of you for taking the time to read this and post your replies to me. Thanks for caring. Thanks for being there. Thanks for you support. Hugs everyone.....
ONE MONTH DOWN... and as MootPoint said, I'm not going to worrry about the rest of my life...just one day at a time.... hugs again....
Wow, so glad I found someone else who has the same problem I have. Also thank you everyone else for your support and wisdom. It is so very helpful to me right now.
First I wanted to address Lizzy and needtogrowup. The first 2 weeks were the hardest. I had the crying spells, the mood swings, the I hate myself like this symdrome, I would yell at my child and then feel like I'm a terrible mother and want to smoke so I would feel better and not yell. I couldn't sleep, I lost weight, all I could think about was smoking. I did what you did and when I couldn't handle it anymore, I went for a drive. That helped me get out of the house. I don't have a support system in place other then my husband and at times, I've hated him for this but now I understand where he is coming from. Today as he was leaving for work and I was feeling weak, he took out his wallet and handed me a picture of our child. He said put that in your pocket, use it like an AA card. When you feel weak, pull out the picture and remember why you are doing this. It's a neat idea and did take the edge off my first craving this morning.
I've seen that MA has meetings online and I'm hoping to check it out this week. As far as attending a meeting, such as NA, I've heard that they don't take marijuana addiction very seriously and some have found no support there. My husband thinks I should go to a therapist so I can talk to someone, but again, with our adoption and hoping to adopt one more child, I just can't bring myself to go and talk to someone without the fear of a backlash coming to me.
I do have one friend, who is very spiritual who I see about once a month. We help keep each other on track with our New Years resolution lists. Last year was the first year, I actually did what I said. I told her, years ago that I quit but now, at our next meeting, I will be fully honest with her so that I can have her as a support system also. I picked up the book on Rational Recovery and find the book interesting. I don't know if I can buy into it yet, but it makes sense and of course, it deals with no meetings. I know the chance of relapse is greater without a support system so I'm working on that and try to open myself up to different avenue's. Maybe I could try a NA meeting in the evening while my husband is at home to watch the baby.
In the meantime, this board is EXTREMLY helpful. I am thankful for each of you for taking the time to read this and post your replies to me. Thanks for caring. Thanks for being there. Thanks for you support. Hugs everyone.....
ONE MONTH DOWN... and as MootPoint said, I'm not going to worrry about the rest of my life...just one day at a time.... hugs again....
Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Southern California
Posts: 129
One month, WOW what an inspiration...all I do is be amazed by this discoverly of others like me actually making it happen.
I agree about NA in that we potheads are sometimes laughed at by others who don't understand that for us..it is addicting.
Now with my 6th day. my daughter says I am an inspiration to her..She is amazed as I live with her and she has seen me strugle all her life with this..She used to be disgusted with me as a child and teenager, until she because addicted..I can't tell you what it would mean for my family to see me do this. Love you guys..randa
I agree about NA in that we potheads are sometimes laughed at by others who don't understand that for us..it is addicting.
Now with my 6th day. my daughter says I am an inspiration to her..She is amazed as I live with her and she has seen me strugle all her life with this..She used to be disgusted with me as a child and teenager, until she because addicted..I can't tell you what it would mean for my family to see me do this. Love you guys..randa
We all need each other.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The road of happy destiny.
Posts: 2,294
Hello everyone--I just posted a similar reply on Lizzy's thread, but wanted to post something here as well. 2Bseen, pot is addictive. Your friends are wrong. The studies which were done that showed marijuana is not addictive were done when the THC content in it was much less than it is today. Withdrawal is a very real thing. It takes up to 45 days for all the THC to get out of your system, which means with one month of not smoking, you are almost, if not already clean. That is a fantastic accomplishment. Your friends are probably not encouraging you to stop because they don't want to admit that they have a problem themselves. I smoked pot off and on for 16 years, everyday for the last 7, and I am now 135 clean and sober. It hasn't been easy, but it has been worth it. Hang in there! Together we can do it.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Charlottesville, Va
Posts: 632
Im Moontime and I'm an addict, and I'm saying this for identification purposes, but I grew weed, smoked weed, ate weed, slept with weed for most of my life. It was my ways and means to get more harder drugs. I even said I'll only smoke weed, to crave my other urgings, that didn't work either. Depression/tired/laziness, you name it..... lasted for about 3 months. But, I pushed myself to do things, even though I wanted to just sit on the couch, I made myself do the things, regardless of how I felt. That's what recovery is about it's about doing the same actions in recovery despite my feelings. I made a committment to this program of NA, which means abstinence from all drugs, including liquid dope aka alcohol. My life has never ever been better, my suggestion would be to give your friends the heisman for now and work on yourself.
Old and in the Way
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: High and Dry
Posts: 789
Glad you're here 2bseen. Children are a powerful motivator to get clean - that's why I'm here too. I'm not a pot smoker, so I won't add to what others have said on that subject, but keep posting. The people here know what you're going through, and are tremendously supportive.
Paused
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Anytown, USA
Posts: 101
2beseen,
you are not alone. read my thread "newbie' and needtogrowup thread. we understand. i felt that people on this site might get upset becasue my pot didn't seem to be anything compared to their alcohol binges, multiple addictions, and so on. i was so very wrong. we are all jsut struggling to be better people and better to our families and not be in bondage to something that screws us up. so happy that your husband is supportive, that says a lot about how he feels about you and is very detrimental to your recovery. one month is so wonderful and you read what lulu said. could take another couple of weeks for that THC to completely leave your system. keep praying. that is the key to all of this. Believing in a higher power and believing for a change. you can have it. read all you can on this and depression. educate yourself. if you don't like the book, get another one. you are worth fighting for.
audra
you are not alone. read my thread "newbie' and needtogrowup thread. we understand. i felt that people on this site might get upset becasue my pot didn't seem to be anything compared to their alcohol binges, multiple addictions, and so on. i was so very wrong. we are all jsut struggling to be better people and better to our families and not be in bondage to something that screws us up. so happy that your husband is supportive, that says a lot about how he feels about you and is very detrimental to your recovery. one month is so wonderful and you read what lulu said. could take another couple of weeks for that THC to completely leave your system. keep praying. that is the key to all of this. Believing in a higher power and believing for a change. you can have it. read all you can on this and depression. educate yourself. if you don't like the book, get another one. you are worth fighting for.
audra
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