Tetra

It's almost midnight but I can't sleep and I have to be up early in the morning.
My cousin had a breakdown a few weeks ago and is in hospital. But when my 89 year old Grandma heard about it, she became unwell. She gets very frustrated because her mind is as sharp as a razor but she can't do things and she gets angry. Like last week she was baking and she said to me that so was so upset because she only had energy to bake one loaf instead of two! We were over for dinner on Easter Sunday and she started throwing up. She has not been able to eat and my aunt is bringing her to the hospital tomorrow. This doctor friend of my aunts said that he would fit her in at 8 am in the morning as a favour. I baked two loaves of bread this morning and called over with them. My Gran started crying and gave me a tenner for "always being a good girl". I was not a good girl, but anyway...


My brother was home for a few days with his fiancee and they have left now and I feel very lonely. I kinda have this feeling that when they get married we will see even less of him than we do already. And I guess I am a bit jealous as well.

Thanks for reading x

Upward2Enlightenment

You aren't alone.

malcolmsloan

I know those late nights well, Tetra. I remember early on, staring at 3:00 am when I had to be up at 5. It gets better, you will sleep. Try not to let the rumination get out of control. Sometimes, I think of some kind of soothing word and just say it over and over in my head, like counting sheep. Sleep will come.

Thepatman

Sorry your having a hard time.

Sometimes I say to myself, If I sleep the better, if I don't I just relax a listen to relaxing music. I often find less stressed and fall asleep.


Btw if you have a clock in your bedroom and look at it often, turn it the other way. I used to stress the hell out, get hot flashes, even mad.

Take deep breaths, and try to relax.

Prayers your way

Anna

Tetra, you have a lot going on in your family, but be sure to take some time for yourself to just relax and chill. I hope your Grandma is okay.

PurpleKnight

Grandparents are amazing, I don't have any still living, but I remember simple things like baking and appreciating someone taking the time to visiting was never lost on them!!

I hope all goes well tomorrow!!

Tetra

So Grandma has gallstones. Keyhole surgery the week after next. At least it's not cancer. Thank you for all your prayers.
Love and hugs xx

Thepatman

Happy to hear about your grandma!

You survided the difficult night, kuddos to you!

robgt350

Tetra,
i have those feelings of being alone too at times. you like baking bread, so do i. i started doing it as a hobby after i stopped drinking. have you thought of coming to the chat room and talk to people. it really helps, it did for me

Upward2Enlightenment

Glad to hear Grandma will be ok

ChickChick

I hope you are feeling less lonely today. We are here for you! I'm glad your Grandma will be okay, I will keep her in my prayers that her surgery goes well.