AlcoholFree66

Up early to walk before my commute to work. Just wanting to touch base before a long day because I won't be able to log back in for another 12 hours at least.

Wow - I am realising that I've rested on my laurels thinking that I could stay sober for 6 years so I could do it anytime.

In reality I have not been able to.
I get these brief sharp feelings of anxiety because I'm so afraid realising that I must live in the day again and in fact I only have a 24 hour reprieve. I am confused and I'm only just starting to see how scrambled my mind is. I know I need to be careful with the huge plank of wood I keep hitting myself with.

At times I have snippets of how profoundly I my alcoholism has impacted my children and husband's lives. Some protective measure must be keeping me slightly numb because if I think about it too much the guilt and pain is unbearable.

Please keep me sober another 24 hours.

ScottFromWI

I know the feeling AF66. It absolutely gets better, just remember you are only on day 2. Instead of thinking about what you've done, think about what you can do to be a better mom/wife/person today - people notice that and appreciate it.

LBrain

Hang in there AF66. Eventually it will no longer feel like a reprieve. Let's stick to a plan and make it a permanent decision to facilitate a permanent outcome. When you achieve that you will no longer be hanging on under a 24 hour reprieve. You will be free once again.

Goldcoastgirl

Hi AF66. Well done getting to this point. Try not to overwhelm yourself by trying to fix everything at once. You know the drill I know, just get thru today. We are all here for you x