What do you want to be when you grow up?
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49
What do you want to be when you grow up?
As we all know, alcohol stunts the maturing process. I'm 60 years old and in many respects I still feel like a child.
Wanted to share something I wrote a month or so ago:
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
When I was a child, time seemed to move so slowly. I remember standing in the bathroom with my father, while he was shaving and getting ready for work. I was probably 5 or so. I clearly remember him asking me "what do you want to be when you grow up?" I could not fathom growing up, the concept was so far in the future. God, just thinking about what I wanted for Christmas seemed an eternity away.
As the years went by, all of a sudden time picked up pace. Moving rapidly through the years. Faster and faster, kind of a blur, time marched, no, sprinted on. At times I could only think I wanted the world to stop and let me off. Slow the inexorable spin. Kids born, growing up, high school, college and now their own families. I was along for the ride but had no control over the speed of the ride. I was almost like a bystander, watching it all go by and getting along by reacting as events occurred. Where did it all go, that huge chunk of time? Why do I feel like I missed out on large portions of that chunk of time?
Now time seems to have slowed to a crawl. The future again seems so distant. Now, 55 years after I stood in that bathroom watching Dad, I remember vividly the sights, smells and sounds from that long ago morning. And the future seemed to be an eternity away.
I have come full circle. The future seems to be an eternity away.
And I find myself asking myself the same question Dad asked me..................
What do you want to be when you grow up?............................
My Dad was naked, with only shaving cream adorning his face. A red and white striped can of Colgate-Palmolive shaving cream atop the lid of the toilet tank. Snow in the trees outside the bathroom window, a crisp blue sky. The smell of bacon coming from the kitchen. A moment frozen in time.
I sit here, in the present, fully clothed. But, in all honesty, I am no less naked, as was Dad, 55 long years ago.
Wanted to share something I wrote a month or so ago:
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
When I was a child, time seemed to move so slowly. I remember standing in the bathroom with my father, while he was shaving and getting ready for work. I was probably 5 or so. I clearly remember him asking me "what do you want to be when you grow up?" I could not fathom growing up, the concept was so far in the future. God, just thinking about what I wanted for Christmas seemed an eternity away.
As the years went by, all of a sudden time picked up pace. Moving rapidly through the years. Faster and faster, kind of a blur, time marched, no, sprinted on. At times I could only think I wanted the world to stop and let me off. Slow the inexorable spin. Kids born, growing up, high school, college and now their own families. I was along for the ride but had no control over the speed of the ride. I was almost like a bystander, watching it all go by and getting along by reacting as events occurred. Where did it all go, that huge chunk of time? Why do I feel like I missed out on large portions of that chunk of time?
Now time seems to have slowed to a crawl. The future again seems so distant. Now, 55 years after I stood in that bathroom watching Dad, I remember vividly the sights, smells and sounds from that long ago morning. And the future seemed to be an eternity away.
I have come full circle. The future seems to be an eternity away.
And I find myself asking myself the same question Dad asked me..................
What do you want to be when you grow up?............................
My Dad was naked, with only shaving cream adorning his face. A red and white striped can of Colgate-Palmolive shaving cream atop the lid of the toilet tank. Snow in the trees outside the bathroom window, a crisp blue sky. The smell of bacon coming from the kitchen. A moment frozen in time.
I sit here, in the present, fully clothed. But, in all honesty, I am no less naked, as was Dad, 55 long years ago.
A simple guy making his way
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Karma, hello. I recently wrote of a moment from when I was about the same age as you when a moment made an indelible mark on my heart. Granted everyone was clothed at the time but the emotion of it stuck with me.
You write beautifully. I appreciate it.
I will soon be 50. I think as if I were the youngster I have always been. Growing up is foreign. But to answer the question as posed I have to say I want to be happy when I grow up.
I have a moment as well. I was walking with my mom in a mall when I was about 12. I looked at her and said I want to be like you when I grow up. My mom actually stopped us and said rather sternly... " Kenneth you don't want to be like me."
Hum...? Why would the single most loved person in my life say that?
As an adult I know now. But she always did say all she wanted for me was to be happy.
Treasure that memory of your dad. I think you already do.
Be well!
Ken
You write beautifully. I appreciate it.
I will soon be 50. I think as if I were the youngster I have always been. Growing up is foreign. But to answer the question as posed I have to say I want to be happy when I grow up.
I have a moment as well. I was walking with my mom in a mall when I was about 12. I looked at her and said I want to be like you when I grow up. My mom actually stopped us and said rather sternly... " Kenneth you don't want to be like me."
Hum...? Why would the single most loved person in my life say that?
As an adult I know now. But she always did say all she wanted for me was to be happy.
Treasure that memory of your dad. I think you already do.
Be well!
Ken
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 94
It's been over 30 years since I promised my Dad on his deathbed "be patient with your mother, she's a pain in the butt, but she means well". I had mom essentially to myself for over 25 years (sister's visits very few and very short). I could have done better but the Christmas after she passed at age 90 I got a sweet note from two of her high school classmates who validated my care and devotion ("we know you took good care of your mom because she told us so". No Guilt or Shame - just good memories. namaste and P.S. After 7 years on my own I'm finally a "grown up" and can be anything I want.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
How many of you guys, who claim to have not grown up enough, have problems with procrastination? Addiction-related or otherwise?
I do. Just read this yesterday:
Why We Procrastinate | Psychology Today
I know that a lot of my eccentric and so called unconventional features need to go...
I do. Just read this yesterday:
Why We Procrastinate | Psychology Today
I know that a lot of my eccentric and so called unconventional features need to go...
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