Rochel

I have quit time and time again and I'm so discouraged. I really feel like if I could just feel some motivation I could stay sober for longer periods. I feel as I have no self esteem or personal pride. I just function on a day to day basis with no goals. Hoping that something here and soon helps. Glad to be here.

Hevyn

Welcome to SR Rochel - you found a great place. We're all in this together - I'm glad you reached out for some support.

hayley86

Welcome Rochel, you will find tons of support here. Glad you have joined us.

EndGameNYC

Getting sober one day at a time would address your self esteem, personal pride, and setting and then achieving realistic goals.

Pedro1234

I hope you can find the added strength you need here Rochel

FeelingGreat

Hi Rochel, lots of us tried many times before it all clicked. My attempts of one sort or another stretched over several years. You are not doomed to fail; the success lies within you and it may take some hard work.
Do you have techniques for dealing with cravings? A support network (doctor, AA, SR)? Have you done some research on what worked for others? Staying away from people and situations which trigger you? Have you accepted that you are an alcoholic and can never drink again?

Don't give up, and give yourself the best chance you can.

goose333

Rochel,
I know what you mean. I 'stopped' many times. I just stopped again. You say you have no goals but that's not true. You have one very important goal. How will you achieve it? Did you make a plan? If not, try that this time. Write down a plan. How might you go about achieving your goal? For me an important aspect was getting rid of my hidden booze and my hiding place. BTW, there is a 24 hour club under 'Newcomers Daily Support Threads' that I find helpful. Perhaps you will too.

Goose

Rochel

I am in tears. After reading you post, I got up and put the vodka down the drain. So, so much of the time I feel lonely and like no one cares. The fact that you took a moment to reply to me was uplifting. Thank you!

Stoogy

Why don't you give yourself a chance to shine, show the real you that you know has always been there you will be surprised just how much better you will feel and look to everyone. You can do it, set small targets then give yourself rewards for achieving them. Wishing you well.

PAINLESS66

Dearest Rochel... I know exactly what your feeling so im gunna give you my opinion with just over a month clean and sober my damn self... KEEP YOURSELF BUSY... Go to either AA or NA meetings as much as u can and after going there a few times youll get a feel for a sponsor that u like. Once u do that youll feel so much better about things because youll be able to call another person just like u who will never judge u ever... theyll tell u the line... CALL BEFORE U FALL.. its a line but very very true... its good to see at least u know u have a problem that your wanting help with. i just said a prayer for u that u will find a program that will more then help u stay clean and sober... best to you.. this site is awesome and the posts help me alot and i hope theyll help u too...

Rochel

To think that someone half way around the world took time to say something hopeful and encouraging to me is cheering me up. Thank you for your response. I will consider it all and work on it. Thanks again.

Rochel

Thank you for your attention and input!

Rochel

I do attend a 16 step empowerment group once a week. Based on the book, Many Paths, one Journey. I do need to use the phone more. Thanks for your prayers and input.

freshstart57

Rochel, this is exactly what I did that Monday morning almost three years ago - I took that 60 oz bottle of cheap vodka and poured it into the toilet. Next, the few bottles of wine I had went to my neighbours, and then all the empties went back for recycling. I had help with that one, believe me. I don't know who has 30 cases of empty 40 and 60 oz vodka bottles, but I did.

I was scared half to death, but I knew that there was only ever going to be one way forward for me, and that was to face my life sober. I knew that I could be sober for a second, or a minute, so I promised to never drink NOW. If it was now, no alcohol for me. I learned about mindfulness, about focusing on the present moment, instead of on my miserable past, or on my future which terrified me. Just now. Now is the only time that I can control, the only time I can change anything. Only now.

You can do this too, Rochel, you can choose to never now drink. There is a life without this shame and guilt and dishonesty and failure and depression and anxiety and misery. Yikes! It is so much better sober. There is peace of mind, there is self respect, there is calm, satisfaction, beauty, joy and even some happiness. You deserve it, and you can do it too. Onward!

StormiNormi

Rachel, I am getting as much from your post, and subsequent responses, as you. Thank you! 10 minutes ago I was so full of anger, I decided to go get some wine. For whatever reason, I choose to read your thread. I no longer have the desire, even tho up th my husband has stood me up, again; I am happier in my garden than the alternative. God bless you

Goldcoastgirl

Hi Rochel, I hope you find some peace and the strength to try to get sober. The knowledge and help on SR is sometimes humbling for me and I know it can help you too. Just keep coming back here and best wishes on your journey, you are worth it x

PAINLESS66

Good girl.. Pour those demons down the drain!!!

OverTheUnder

I'm going through the same thing right now Rochel. The feelings you're feeling are your's. It's the alcohol leaving you. You will start to feel better and better as the days go by. I promise you. I know it sounds cliche, but go to a meeting.

Going to meetings help me get out of my head and stop comparing myself to everyone else.

PamperingMe

I have been where you are many times.
I'm planning on this time being the last.
This time around, I did something really difficult for me...I told three close friends that I was stopping drinking because I have a problem. It was hard but their reactions were so much more supportive than I imagined, if you have a single person in your life to confide in, it might help. For now, use us.

GracieLou

it is going to be okay.

I used to feel the same way. Very lonely, scared and like nobody cared. Other alcoholics do care because we have been there. Think about going to an AA meeting. You got nothing to lose.

Hang in there.