Grateful to have found this forum!
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Moving on from this nightmare
Solitary Thinker, we're in the right place! I have moved on from the nightmare before, and know how it feels to begin to heal. It's a process that takes awhile, but it's worth going through the pain, to get there. I loved being sober. Didn't even think about picking up a drink for many years. But this is a cunning, baffling and powerful addiction. It overtakes every area of our lives and makes us sick, emotionally, physically and spiritually. It removes us from family and friends who are healthy and cannot understand our absence from their lives. Let's join hands (from coast to coast, I'm on the West Coast) and help each other get through this difficult, frightening time.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
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Thank you it feels wonderful to be reminded you know? This is my support group now, it's all I got and the few days I have been reading stuff here it really already started to change my life. Stay strong...I need to remember that I am worth it and I can't best myself up and hate myself anymore for my problems and emotions, I just do so do and it hurts every day. I'm not giving up ever, I'm on day 5 and doing ok, I don't want to get high or drink. 8 years for drugs but 5 days for booze, I can do this and you can too obviously by what you said. Thank you..
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Grubby, what's important is that you are here, right now. Don't look back. I could say the same thing. Why didn't I seek help sooner? Because I suppose, I wasn't ready. Now, I am. The answers come from others who have walked this path. Why didn't I use my search engine to find these people? I don't know the answer, so will stop asking the question.
AA didn't work for me during my most recent rounds of seeking recovery. I feel that I've found it, here.
AA didn't work for me during my most recent rounds of seeking recovery. I feel that I've found it, here.
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One thing that is freaking me out a bit, is the twitter button I see here. Can anyone in the forum tweet our posts, or only the person who posts? Can someone answer this question please? I don't want my most intimate communications to be posted on Twitter!
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Grateful to say that I am feeling much better today. Have an appointment with my doctor this afternoon. No longer worried about withdrawal symptoms. I hadn't been drinking heavily, but was watering down every drink (9 parts water to 1 part alcohol.) That helped me to taper off, slowly.
I have written down all of the reasons that I want to regain my sobriety and MUST do that, or I will not be able to function or to be there for the people who need me. Alcoholism only leads to inevitable decline, and it can come like an avalanche. I need my liver, my brain, my kidneys, and don't want to leave a tragic legacy "She died from alcoholism" for my children and grandchildren, and for my friends and siblings. I don't want to be remembered that way.
Began my day with gratitude for this support group!
Thank you!
I have written down all of the reasons that I want to regain my sobriety and MUST do that, or I will not be able to function or to be there for the people who need me. Alcoholism only leads to inevitable decline, and it can come like an avalanche. I need my liver, my brain, my kidneys, and don't want to leave a tragic legacy "She died from alcoholism" for my children and grandchildren, and for my friends and siblings. I don't want to be remembered that way.
Began my day with gratitude for this support group!
Thank you!
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Originally Posted by JoantheMaid 
don't want to leave a tragic legacy "She died from alcoholism" for my children and grandchildren, and for my friends and siblings. I don't want to be remembered that way.
I'm glad you're feeling better today, Joan.
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Thank you, Anna
Yes, my family's well-being is the primary motivator for me. How can I hurt the people I love by allowing alcoholism to take my life? It has already caused me to lose precious time with them, because I can't drive to see them, can't go walking on the beach with them when I am not stable, or feeling ashamed of my condition, trying to hide that condition (unsuccessfully) only created pain for me and for them.
I got sober when my sons were young, for their sakes. It hurt so much to see their hurt as fully grown adults, when they knew I had relapsed. Brought back all of the pain from their childhoods, and I saw their memories and fear surface. The sad looks on their faces, their eyes filling with tears.
Stayed sober for so many years (24) that they assumed it could never happen again. But it did. And so, I move on from here to make amends by becoming healthy and whole again. I look forward to spending time with them as the healthy Mom they knew, and assuring them that it's going to be okay.
I got sober when my sons were young, for their sakes. It hurt so much to see their hurt as fully grown adults, when they knew I had relapsed. Brought back all of the pain from their childhoods, and I saw their memories and fear surface. The sad looks on their faces, their eyes filling with tears.
Stayed sober for so many years (24) that they assumed it could never happen again. But it did. And so, I move on from here to make amends by becoming healthy and whole again. I look forward to spending time with them as the healthy Mom they knew, and assuring them that it's going to be okay.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
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Originally Posted by joanthemaid
yes, my family's well-being is the primary motivator for me. How can i hurt the people i love by allowing alcoholism to take my life? It has already caused me to lose precious time with them, because i can't drive to see them, can't go walking on the beach with them when i am not stable, or feeling ashamed of my condition, trying to hide that condition (unsuccessfully) only created pain for me and for them. I got sober when my sons were young, for their sakes. It hurt so much to see their hurt as fully grown adults, when they knew i had relapsed. Brought back all of the pain from their childhoods, and i saw their memories and fear surface. The sad looks on their faces, their eyes filling with tears. Stayed sober for so many years (24) that they assumed it could never happen again. But it did. And so, i move on from here to make amends by becoming healthy and whole again. I look forward to spending time with them as the healthy mom they knew, and assuring them that it's going to be okay.
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