AdmimalBlueEyes

I work in construction , about a year ago I met a fellow worker. I don't know how it came up but within about 20 mins he told me he was a recovering meth addict. I related I'm a aa.I really respected his honesty and oppeness. Since then I've tried to live outside the closet, the other day I was at work a guy asked me to go drinking with him I said I don't like to drink I'm a aa, he asked me how much I used to drink , I said about 1/2-2/3 a fifth plus a handfull of tylon to get to sleep. He said " I bet I can out drink you" at this point I paused I was slightly annoyed but also ammused by this insensitive question, I then responded " I doubt it " as a first class alcoholic I do not stop drinking untill I pass out and alcohol alone dosnt make me pass out. , so unless your a fellow bi polar alcoholic I don't think you can," I thought that would be the end of it , nope , next question " whats the most u ever drank" I thought of my last bender that put me on the road to recovery, I wanted to express to this kid the real flavor and hell of being a a.a. I said , one friday I got 1/5th of vodka 80 proof and drank it all then I got 2. .75. Liters of mikes hard leonade 20 proof ( = each a bottle of wine). but I wasn't done yet so I got a few of those crwn royal mini shots you get on airplanes drank those and then popped a few tylonal pm passed out and repeated, I said when I woke up monday there was 3 more fifths and a bunch more mikes hard lemonades empty lying around my. Room . he said no one can drink that much you would get alcohol posioning , I chuckled and said you can't drink like that but aa s can, will,do and must drink like that , most of us risk organ failure on a daily bassis, the only thing that ended that binge was I was to comotose to walk to the gas station to get more booze,
Next question " why did you quit ?" I'm preterbed by this question because I thought I described that bige as both unpleasent and unhealthy, grrr. I said because I dont like going thru life hung over , I had enough time off after that binge to go thru a safe detox it wasn't pleasent but it wasn't that hard , I'm much happier not hung over , I respect myself again, I feel I can be in meaningfull relationships without lying. And I'm not offending my god or my fathers memory on a daily basis.
Next question is the most frustrating one I have to repatedly answer . I felt like just being silent. Because the kid wasn't getting what I was saying . question " can't you just have one or two drinks " me " yes I can have one , after I have that one strange hunger arises in me lusting for more alcohol while I'm trying to control that hunger my subconcious begins to tell me its ok to have more , it will trick me into justifying drinking more , its quite clever and skilled at manipulation, as the effects of the drug set in it begins to detract from my abillity to think logicly, at this point there is a + 95% chance I will have another drink, if I do there is a+97% chance I get drunk after which there is a +98 chance I get drunk the next day after which there is a 99.9% chance for me to go into full relapse.
So you really can't have one ? answer " first I don't want a drink, my God has blessed me . I did not deserve it but he took away that hunger , the only way I way I will have that hunger is if I purposely choose to drink, kinda like solomon and his hair" "I sayeim blessed because I don't crave alcohol and don't really think about it , a lot of addicts have to struggle daily sometimes hourly, it really hard , I have much respect for there sobriety but still even for there effort the rewards are amazing.
I'm hoping this is the end of the conversation. I'm done explaining it , how do you tell a 26 year old party boy that drinking isn't really fun, its dangerous, and leads to a bad place but no after a pause he has one more thing to say . after a long pause he says" hey I got a real bad drinking problem, I don't know what to do , can you help me ?" Answer "of course my friend "
We now talk quit a bit , were on seperate jobs now but he calls , I knowehes not totally clean but he's working on it . he wants to travel to my jobsite and hangout with me .
I'm glad that I live outside the closet , a preacher who knows my lifestyle told me once " son your a drifter but you have a strong spirit wherever you go you effect people " I looked at him and said pastor I don't effect anyone I'm bipolar I make it a point to move like the wind leaving no trace behind once I'm gone . he just smiled . looking back maybe he is right.
Anyways just wanted to share this recent story

Dee74

I wouldn't have listened to any older guy that tried to tell me - in fact I didn't.
Sad but true.

I can share my experience but I can't make anyone else get sober or even 'live outside the closet'

I wouldn't get into peeing contests either Admiral.
Thats for drinkers, not ex drinkers IMO.

D