purechaos

You can do it, you are almost over the hump... almost there... KEEP ON GOING... just a few pills will destroy your progress... just one will make you start all over again... Just like Opiophobe said... back to square one... Think about all you have been through in the last 70 hours... I am sure you would rather that not be wasted time... I noticed when I quit pills cold turkey the physical junk went away and the mental stuff lasted for a bit longer.... You need to think about all the crap the pills are doing to your body... it has adjused to a new "normal" now it thinks something is wrong... it takes a bit for it to realize that everythinig is really ok and it will adjust again... You just need to give it a little more time.... Try to get as much sleep as you can... I know its terribly difficult... take hot showers... Distract yourself... you CAN do this... you WILL do this... you are almost there!!!

coco17

Thanks everyone went shopping and the dreaded chemist was right there stood out the front thinking how I could get some pills and then decided no no more pills and got outta there real quick, its that moment of weakness where I just think I need my friends(pills) to be with me.. crazy I know because if I do get some your all right I won't just take 2 it will end up being 4 then 6 and then 10 again right back to the start so a small victory for me just gotta keep going.
As for withdrawals they are well and truly underway and at this stage not my legs are the worst followed by time on the toilet then depression/anxiety and grumpiness like never before.

OpioPhobe

Coco - in my experience the RLS would peak on day 3 (specifically the night between day 3 / 4). Digestive 'disturbances' would actually signal the beginning of the turning point, and it would start letting up not long after that. 70 hours may not seem like that much, but it is a huge accomplishment. Those hours are precious and don't give them up for anything.

It is great you were able to resist the urge. Always remember - you never have to go through this again. Ever. Unless you make the decision to go through it again.

coco17

Must resist the urge so much easier said than done I'm feeling ok at the moment but feel like I'm not me at the moment and I know thats completely normal as my body is not getting the codeine its been used to for the last 3 years.
I have been reading some incredible stories on here and they are all helping me so much and when I have the urge I seem to come on here and ramble!!!
the idea that I could just take a few is all I'm thinking about at the moment and whilst I understand that it would be taking a step backwards after not having any for a while but the need and mind is very strong.
I need to understand that i can get that feeling from something else anything else rather than taking the pills but at the moment they seem to be the easier option to relax/chill out and feel warm and cozy!!!
Will not be going out for the rest of the day I am in lockdown……just incase!!

new star

Coco I was in lockdown for a week or two. Just stayed on the couch and cried lol. Hard with two kids to look after! You're doing so well x

purechaos

how ya holding up?

coco17

Well how am I holding up not to bad thanks purechaos its a shocking ride and I just have to keep going the physical symptoms are easing and I do feel that little bit better and a small amount of determination is growing inside of me. I am taking normal panadol for my legs and when i take the panadol Im instantly reminded of what I want to feel like when I take panadine extra or panadine forte.. that good old feeling of everything is going to be ok!!
Its now thursday here in oz so 4 days is great for me the temptation is still there so I'm still in lockdown and keeping as busy as I can around the house with the kids.
Does anyone have any ideas about the mental side of things as to when or if ever I will forget the feelings of happiness associated with my pills and actually be able to walk past the chemist and not want to get any??
Thanks everyone for reading and listening to me go on and on!!!

Justadude

Congratulations on your fight! You are a gladiator! I sat with a dear friend as she went through this. I'm so impressed with your effort! Keep going... Keep at it. I don't know when the craving stops as you walk past the chemist... I think we learn to deal with it better. Prayers for your strength and resilience!

tanyapmc

Hi Coco. Good job on fighting the cravings. I was 5+ years clean off of opiates and benzos then had a relapse after surgery and now have 85 days.

Have you thought of trying a 12 step mtg? I go and it definitely helps me.

Take care!!

coco17

Thanks Justadude appreciate it and Tanyapmc do you mean a meeting situation like aa? Im not sure that they have meetings here in Australia for codeine withdrawal and also to be honest I'm a closet pill popper that Iam aware of nobody knows what I have been doing for the last 3 years.

tanyapmc

Yes I was speaking of aa or na. In the states we also have a pills anonymous meeting

I find I do better when I have support of others that have been through the same thing

coco17

Alright I have a feeling I have spoken to soon.. I feel yuck!!! Hot and cold sweats grumpy tired and exhausted and its all hit me this afternoon the only thing that seems to have gone are the leg pain and the headache is not as bad.
Im assuming that right now my body is telling me to get some codeine as is my brain and its craving like never before.
My mind is still in the phase of a couple wouldn't hurt and I think this must be the most dangerous part for a lot of people and myself because right now right in this moment I want them pills!! Most intense craving I have had since I started my journey posting on here just to keep me going.

new star

Coco it unfortunately took me weeks to feel ok again I did however take Panadol and nurofen if the aches got really bad.

As for the mental side of things...I now look at chemists and hate the sight of them. I never want to go back to that desperate chemist hop again. But yes I still crave the high I got from pills. Wonder if it ever goes away

Chasingthedream

Coco- how are you doing today. Seems like you're doing a good job of not giving into that little voice. Keep going! You CAN do this.

Justadude

It's 8:45 AM at my location in the States. I'm just dropping in to say we are thinking about you and your battle. Prayers and positive energy for your fortitude and resilience.

SkyBlueSky

Hang in there Coco! It took about a week for myself when I kicked my H addiction. After that, it is all about the cravings, but they go away within time.

Sulu1

Keep going coco,

You never have to feel like this again, remember that.

OpioPhobe

Coco - that thought of a little wouldn't hurt is an insidious one. I would suggest doing everything that you can to disprove that thought to yourself. The fact is that EVERY time I quit a cold turkey I had told myself the same thing. Literally, I never quit a cold turkey kick without telling myself that it was just too much and I needed to taper. In reality, I was justifying the fact that I was giving up by BSing myself that I would quit tomorrow. Eventually I realized that it was just impossible to try to take a little to ease symptoms and tapering was a pipe dream. When I was successful I told myself it's all or nothing. Either I quit now or I go back on and will take it everyday for the rest of my LIFE. There was no middle ground for me. There was no tapering. There was no taking "a little" bit. It just didn't work like that for me. At some point it has to be all or nothing. Don't let yourself choose 'all' by thinking it is a 'little bit'.

coco17

Day 5 and not going to bad today, most physical symptoms have gone and its more the mental side of things I am battling. Perhaps that will ease but as for now Im happy that I haven't taken any pills and when I see a chemist I will just get outta there before anything can happen.
I must say OpioPhobe your are right as if I had have had them within reach over the last 5 days I would have caved in for sure.!!!
Thanks everyone for checking in on me I appreciate it a lot, this forum has certainly been a saver for me big shout out to you all!!

Thanks everyone and Happy Easter from Australia!!

OverTheUnder

Coco good job. I'm dealing with the same thing. I'm dealing with heroin withdrawals man. No one (except my dealer) knew I was using so I've had to go about my life normally. The first 2 days sucked. Today I woke up feeling pretty good (relatively speaking).

If i can do it so can you. We've made it so far. I go to AA meetings. They have tons of opiate addicts in there. Give it a try.