Saturday is here again
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,022
One goal I have in sobriety is trying to get my metaphorical house together as a person -- trying to develop interests, hobbies, activities that in theory will get me out of the house and interacting with others. I think that's one way the non-drunks make new friends.
So far I am still "woodshedding" -- working on getting my skills up to a non-embarrassing level before trying to play with others -- so I don't know if this is ultimately going to work out. But skill-building keeps me busy on its own, so on that alone it's been pretty good.
(I've been trying to get my running up to where I can join a running club and run some races this summer. Also working on getting it together on guitar so I can smoothly play through jazz charts in-time a little more tastefully than chunking away on the basic block chords.)
I know the feeling you are talking about. Some days I feel very alone. But I have a plan, and I'm working on the plan, and it feels like I'm making (albeit slow) progress to change the state of affairs, and I think that goes a long way towards staving off depression or a feeling of futility. If it turns out to have been all in vain down the road I will come back here and let you know
boy that'd be an uplifting post, huh?
So far I am still "woodshedding" -- working on getting my skills up to a non-embarrassing level before trying to play with others -- so I don't know if this is ultimately going to work out. But skill-building keeps me busy on its own, so on that alone it's been pretty good.
(I've been trying to get my running up to where I can join a running club and run some races this summer. Also working on getting it together on guitar so I can smoothly play through jazz charts in-time a little more tastefully than chunking away on the basic block chords.)
I know the feeling you are talking about. Some days I feel very alone. But I have a plan, and I'm working on the plan, and it feels like I'm making (albeit slow) progress to change the state of affairs, and I think that goes a long way towards staving off depression or a feeling of futility. If it turns out to have been all in vain down the road I will come back here and let you know
boy that'd be an uplifting post, huh?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Aarryckha, I really identify with your OP. During my drinking in the last few years of it, that feeling was the norm, I am still amazed thinking back how I managed to get anything done (sometimes) and keep my head above water to a certain extent... I still have depressed days like that occasionally with most of the nice plans remaining fantasies, but now I try to be more proactive in turning them around. Many good suggestions on this thread.
I find that the trick is to start the action - then it becomes intrinsically rewarding and usually my mood is lifted at least somewhat. We need to break the cycle, like with addiction. I also try to be gentle with myself and not beat me up for not doing everything: sometimes it's a tricky balance between this and still trying to not allow myself to make too many excuses. I've had a very serious tendency to get stuck in my head, isolate myself, and just overthink everything. I've figured that changing this is taking a lot of effort and is a slow process, but I feel I'm getting somewhere with it.
I also find that scheduling small rewarding activities on a regular basis helps boost the mood, especially physically involved activities.
Hope you are feeling better today
I find that the trick is to start the action - then it becomes intrinsically rewarding and usually my mood is lifted at least somewhat. We need to break the cycle, like with addiction. I also try to be gentle with myself and not beat me up for not doing everything: sometimes it's a tricky balance between this and still trying to not allow myself to make too many excuses. I've had a very serious tendency to get stuck in my head, isolate myself, and just overthink everything. I've figured that changing this is taking a lot of effort and is a slow process, but I feel I'm getting somewhere with it.
I also find that scheduling small rewarding activities on a regular basis helps boost the mood, especially physically involved activities.
Hope you are feeling better today
A simple guy making his way
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Hmmm... I might just be crazy since I have conversations with my cat Henry. He is smart enough to respond. The other one is simple and the blank look I get back just isn't worth a comeback from me. Lol
I do want you to consider that your addictive voice is setting you up. I used to do the same thing. Make all these plans and then blame myself for not following through. Then before I knew it I beat myself down and concluded that drinking was inevitable when in fact it's not.
Go easy on yourself. Posting is how I fought back. You are doing a good job and reaching out is important.
Ken
I do want you to consider that your addictive voice is setting you up. I used to do the same thing. Make all these plans and then blame myself for not following through. Then before I knew it I beat myself down and concluded that drinking was inevitable when in fact it's not.
Go easy on yourself. Posting is how I fought back. You are doing a good job and reaching out is important.
Ken
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