Dippy

Going to first AA locally tonight. Deep breaths. I work as a drug and alcohol support worker.
For some stupid reason, the date is important to me. Is the date that people remember the last date they had a drink, or the first day they were alcohol free?
I don't know why my brain is fixating on this.

joshlyman

mine is the first day where i did not have a drink for a full 24 hours

Dippy

Thanks josh... I just got six weeks alcohol free then lost it a week ago. I need to reel it in again now or everything will crash down. It's meant to be today, day one, but it's a struggle

Carlotta

There are two schools for that one: Some people use the date they had their last drink and said enough is enough as their sobriety date others like me use the first day they were clean and sober. Whichever makes the most sense to you symbolically.
If dumping your booze and saying enough is enough at let's say 2pm was your epiphany and a major moment then use that. If your first day clean and sober is what you feel is the beginning of your sober journey then use that date
Congratulations on getting sober and taking that big first step and going to a meeting. I hope you like AA and the steps as much as I do.

MemphisBlues

For some reason my sobriety date, October 15, 2010, is probably about 10 days after I quit drinking and drugging. I was a hapless mess of quaking goo and didn't stumble into an AA meeting until I was sober for about three or four months. I had actually stopped booze and benzos on September 15 of that year, and when cold-turkey benzo hell struck about ten days after my last pill, I drank to try to stave off the insanity. Not much, really: a pint of brandy, a couple of beers, anything to stop the horror of benzo withdrawal. It didn't work.

I know many place huge significance on their sobriety date. For me it was when I was fully committed to sobriety -- which meant I had no clue how to not drink or drug and feared my sanity was lost and for sure my physical health since I couldn't stop shaking and could hardly focus enough to read a sentence and comprehend it, and one drink or one benzo or one hit of pot was going to set whatever mental and physical recovery I could imagine way, way back.

From the sorts I know, their sobriety date is the day after their last drink. Mine was just a whacked, horror-ridden affair, hence my delayed sobriety date.

aasharon90

My last drink was in the wee hours of
8-10-90 when I downed a hand full of
pills with wine and off to bed I went
daring that I would end my life.

That attempt to leave this world at
that time failed when hours later I
was driven off in the back of a police
car to a hospital for a mental evaluation.

My first full day without alcohol was
8-11-90 when I entered recovery and
has become my sobriety date with a
many one days at a time sober added
together to get me where I am today.

ScottFromWI

If you must choose a date i'd recommend going with the first day you didn't actually drink anything.

Concentrating on today is vastly more important in moving forward though. Choosing a method of recovery that works for you ( sounds like you are trying AA out tonight ) and following it will go far in getting you sober. Worrying about what happened in the past will not - so pick a day and move on.

Dippy

I guess the date is the date that I look back and see it was the start of something new. Have had loads of intended dates that crashed and burned.
Am almost totally cacking myself about this meeting at AA tonight.

doggonecarl

Why?

Never mind, I read back and saw that this is your first meeting.

Relax as best you can. Everyone there has been right where you are now.

Dippy

In case I see someone I know, in case they think I am a hypocrite.
In case I feel like I don't relate/ they don't relate to me and that I'm a drift..

ScottFromWI

It's probably more you worrying about the underlying reason why you are going to the meeting ( being an alcoholic ) vs the meeting itself. And that's a valid fear - admitting one is an alcoholic is pretty big-time, scary stuff. But meetings are part of the cure, not part of the problem. They are there to help you get better, and everyone that is there is there for the same reason. You don't need to say anything either - just listen if you don't feel like talking. There will always been the opportunity to talk later.

Dippy

This is my bread and butter, addictions. I'm good at my job too.
But here I am stuck in my own addicted head. I was in fifth gear then suddenly I'm back in neutral. Am scared it does not work for me. Am scared other people talk and seem much worse off than me so that voice in my head says 'see, you're ok, you don't need to be here' and then it slowly crumbles ...

ScottFromWI

Which is even more reason to go listen to others in exactly the same situation as you - so you can get out of your addicted head and start living. We can't do this alone - that's why we are all here helping each other. And that's what you'll find at your meeting tonight too.

Dippy

Thanks Scott

Dippy

Can you imagine though, that you had been going to see someone for alcohol counselling, then you go to an AA meeting and in walks your counsellor in relapse?! How would you feel?.

Dippy

Honestly, how would anyone feel?

LBrain

wouldn't worry about it. I recognized someone who lives close by. I had no idea. It was more of a relief to discover I am not alone in this club.

doggonecarl

Would you rather they run into you at a pub?

sugarbear1

it was fuzzy then, but I think I used the date of my last drink as I finished early that morning and wanted more, but the stores had closed......I attend AA and I go there to save my butt, as we all do. AA wasn't on my bucket list, but I found out that those steps saved my life.

Enjoy the meeting! ....and remember to breathe.....and ya don't need to mention details at the meeting, just listen and relate in.

SoberCAH

Good question, amigo, glad you raised it.

I call the day I walked into a treatment center and asked for help as my sobriety date.

I had some pills and a beer earlier that day, but the jig was up and I knew it.

After 13 years of nightly drinking, I had reversed my direction and started inching my way toward a sober, healthy lifestyle.

If I am wrong, then I guess I need to start celebrating my AA birthday a day later.

The really insane thing is that when I was in the treatment center, I kept thinking that I should have kept drinking for 1 more day.

You couldn't fill a thimble with my judgment or character, though.

Glad you are here.

C