Outed at work -- your take?
Outed at work -- your take?
I was just chatting with two colleagues (C1 & C2). C1 knows that I quit drinking, no more about it. We discussed having an academic year-end party for students. Here they go, I'm standing right there:
C2: (Courage) loves a party!
C1: No she doesn't.
C2: Have you seen her in action?
C1: No, let me tell you, she quit drinking.
C2: Really?
C1: Yeah, she doesn't drink anymore, there's no action there.
C2: Oh, that's no fun.
Should I tell C1 that she was out of line, or leave it?
C2: (Courage) loves a party!
C1: No she doesn't.
C2: Have you seen her in action?
C1: No, let me tell you, she quit drinking.
C2: Really?
C1: Yeah, she doesn't drink anymore, there's no action there.
C2: Oh, that's no fun.
Should I tell C1 that she was out of line, or leave it?
Is any of what they said untrue?
Sounds like getting involved would just be ego driven.
Id leave it alone. Look at it this way, C1 broke the news for you, instead of you having to explain it at the party to C2.
I love the adage, what other people think is none of my business.
It saves me a lot of drama.
Sounds like getting involved would just be ego driven.
Id leave it alone. Look at it this way, C1 broke the news for you, instead of you having to explain it at the party to C2.
I love the adage, what other people think is none of my business.
It saves me a lot of drama.
oh courage I'm sorry this happened to you.
I look at this in another way. C1 is on your side, proud of you and sticking up for you. Saying what a good thing you've done etc and telling C2 they are wrong/out of line for keep trying to bring up your drinking past.
It wasn't said in gossip or maliciously,just a matter of fact thing. I wouldn't say anything. Hold your head high and be mighty proud of yourself. Your colleague is. I'm sure neither colleague mentions it again
I look at this in another way. C1 is on your side, proud of you and sticking up for you. Saying what a good thing you've done etc and telling C2 they are wrong/out of line for keep trying to bring up your drinking past.
It wasn't said in gossip or maliciously,just a matter of fact thing. I wouldn't say anything. Hold your head high and be mighty proud of yourself. Your colleague is. I'm sure neither colleague mentions it again
What others think about you is none of your business. Leave it at that. People that judge others do so because they usually have their own issues they don't want to face or want people to know. You owe no one an explanation.
I have more fun sober than I ever did drunk....but there will always be C2s out there.
There will always be C1s too - I'm not sure what you can do about this once the horse has bolted, to be honest.
What are you feeling about this right now Courage?
D
There will always be C1s too - I'm not sure what you can do about this once the horse has bolted, to be honest.
What are you feeling about this right now Courage?
D
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I agree that C1 didn't say "she quit because she was such an out-of-control, disgusting mess." The cat's out of the bag now. If anyone comments about your lack of imbibing, just chuckle and shrug it off and move aside.
People get used to it and after awhile really don't care. They are much more wrapped up in themselves than in your business.
This might be a blessing in disguise: now that you have a new "reputation" to uphold, you may find more public accountability in maintaining your sobriety when you're at functions. No more secret vacillations about work.
People get used to it and after awhile really don't care. They are much more wrapped up in themselves than in your business.
This might be a blessing in disguise: now that you have a new "reputation" to uphold, you may find more public accountability in maintaining your sobriety when you're at functions. No more secret vacillations about work.
Thanks all. This really isn't bugging me, I just thought it was one of those things where SR would have interesting feedback -- and I was right.
I'm not going to speculate about either person. Oh, except C2 is an idiot, but I already knew that. I think it's interesting that I thought it was a big deal when I told C1 that I wasn't drinking (and I had reason to do so), but she apparently doesn't think of it that way.
I'm not going to speculate about either person. Oh, except C2 is an idiot, but I already knew that. I think it's interesting that I thought it was a big deal when I told C1 that I wasn't drinking (and I had reason to do so), but she apparently doesn't think of it that way.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)