Confessions From Christine
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
I'm so glad I found this place :veryhappy
Great meeting today. Everyone had things to say that hit deeply. One gentleman said....and I so relate...and now will learn from, "I'd go to meetings but I would never leave with AA in my back pocket." He's 15 years sober now. That really hit home to me. I need to learn how to take AA, the Big Book, this new life with me wherever I go. Not just in the morning, or during the day when I'm at work, where it's safe. But with me after work, on weekends, live it, know it, love it, nurture it. I'm getting it......"sometimes quickly, sometime slowly"
I'm not going to let Saturday bring me down. It was a realization that I MUST stay away from the people, place and things that contribute to my drinking. I will learn a different way of living.
I'm going to the library after work, for some of my favorite soup and when I get home I'm going to another meeting later on. And THAT's THAT!!!
Peace Out Friends \/
Great meeting today. Everyone had things to say that hit deeply. One gentleman said....and I so relate...and now will learn from, "I'd go to meetings but I would never leave with AA in my back pocket." He's 15 years sober now. That really hit home to me. I need to learn how to take AA, the Big Book, this new life with me wherever I go. Not just in the morning, or during the day when I'm at work, where it's safe. But with me after work, on weekends, live it, know it, love it, nurture it. I'm getting it......"sometimes quickly, sometime slowly"
I'm not going to let Saturday bring me down. It was a realization that I MUST stay away from the people, place and things that contribute to my drinking. I will learn a different way of living.
I'm going to the library after work, for some of my favorite soup and when I get home I'm going to another meeting later on. And THAT's THAT!!!
Peace Out Friends \/
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
Good Day All,
I took AA home in my back pocket last night. I went to a meeting last night like I said I would. Feeling good today. Will be at my noon meeting today.
Ready to do my step 5, I'll be talking to Mr. D (sponsor) today, seeing when we can do that. Soon I hope.
Thanks SR !!
Wuv Christine
I took AA home in my back pocket last night. I went to a meeting last night like I said I would. Feeling good today. Will be at my noon meeting today.
Ready to do my step 5, I'll be talking to Mr. D (sponsor) today, seeing when we can do that. Soon I hope.
Thanks SR !!
Wuv Christine
we're all mad here!
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: a padded room with bars
Posts: 1,681
I'm going to throw my voice in with the two Dans.
Stay away from slippery places and get back to those meetings!
My slippery place was bed because I drank with the goal of passing out. So I had to stay away from the bedroom except when I went to sleep. Even that was tricky.
Let us know how you're doing!
Stay away from slippery places and get back to those meetings!
My slippery place was bed because I drank with the goal of passing out. So I had to stay away from the bedroom except when I went to sleep. Even that was tricky.
Let us know how you're doing!
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
Greetings from Here !
Good noon meeting. Ah........well, tomorrow is a holiday here, Canada Day, so I don't work. That means I HAVE to do something different
, could be interesting. This is the test my Friends, day off, hot out, relaxing. BUT, I have a plan .......
Morning pancake breakfast downtown, with sober people
Noon AA meeting with B-B-Q at the Alano Club, get me a burger with sober people
Reading my Big Book and Living Sober book in a park, soaking up the sun
And strolling around downtown taking in the festivities, with ......
YOU GUESSED IT.....SOBER people
No slippin' and slidin' tomorrow !!! I'll have AA in my back pocket the whole day.
Signing off now....Pray for me please. Be Back Friday.
Peace Out
Christine
Good noon meeting. Ah........well, tomorrow is a holiday here, Canada Day, so I don't work. That means I HAVE to do something different
, could be interesting. This is the test my Friends, day off, hot out, relaxing. BUT, I have a plan .......Morning pancake breakfast downtown, with sober people
Noon AA meeting with B-B-Q at the Alano Club, get me a burger with sober people
Reading my Big Book and Living Sober book in a park, soaking up the sun
And strolling around downtown taking in the festivities, with ......
YOU GUESSED IT.....SOBER people
No slippin' and slidin' tomorrow !!! I'll have AA in my back pocket the whole day.
Signing off now....Pray for me please. Be Back Friday.
Peace Out
Christine
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
I could KILL somebody, I need an alibi.....
I've come to work so I can vent and post before I tear somebodies face off!!!
I go a spend the night with an effin' man that has been in and out of my life for over 4 years. And nothing has changed or will change. Yes, my life becomes unmanagable when I'm around him, I surrender.
It's 11:15 am here and I could pound back anything right now, I could have an hour ago. That effin' jerk!!
I probably seem like a freekin' idiot right now, but this person is TOXIC and I still go back. This can't go on, I have no peace with him. Does anyone know hard it is to climb that mountain and to have someone hanging on to you and pulling you down.
I keep hearing the same hurtful, demeaning things, and it puts me right back to that "raging b!tch" always defending myself.
It's a Canada Day here and it's a stat holiday. I'm at work posting here so I don't go off the deep end, straight to a liquor store. I'll get to my noon meeting and get the "vibe" I need right now. I can't let my mind take over, I fighting it even as I type this. It's like ..."You'll never change Christine, you're still that lier, that cheat, that effin' idiot, the one Craig says you are."
Acceptance, I will accept who he is, where he is and that I have no control over him or his actions. I know in my heart I'm not that "lieing, cheating, idiot, I'm NOT" I won't' get sucked into HIS reality. *deep breath, relax Christine, you can do this, just relax, step 11...........*
Thank you SR for being here, even if I'm alone right now..............
Confessions by Christine
I've come to work so I can vent and post before I tear somebodies face off!!!
I go a spend the night with an effin' man that has been in and out of my life for over 4 years. And nothing has changed or will change. Yes, my life becomes unmanagable when I'm around him, I surrender.
It's 11:15 am here and I could pound back anything right now, I could have an hour ago. That effin' jerk!!
I probably seem like a freekin' idiot right now, but this person is TOXIC and I still go back. This can't go on, I have no peace with him. Does anyone know hard it is to climb that mountain and to have someone hanging on to you and pulling you down.
I keep hearing the same hurtful, demeaning things, and it puts me right back to that "raging b!tch" always defending myself.
It's a Canada Day here and it's a stat holiday. I'm at work posting here so I don't go off the deep end, straight to a liquor store. I'll get to my noon meeting and get the "vibe" I need right now. I can't let my mind take over, I fighting it even as I type this. It's like ..."You'll never change Christine, you're still that lier, that cheat, that effin' idiot, the one Craig says you are."
Acceptance, I will accept who he is, where he is and that I have no control over him or his actions. I know in my heart I'm not that "lieing, cheating, idiot, I'm NOT" I won't' get sucked into HIS reality. *deep breath, relax Christine, you can do this, just relax, step 11...........*
Thank you SR for being here, even if I'm alone right now..............
Confessions by Christine
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: The Mohave Desert
Posts: 2,306
Take A Deep Breath...
Resentments are one of our big, big trigger's for a relapse.
A little detachment is in order here.
Thank the stars that you got to a computer and came here and are planning to go to a meeting...cool
You do not have to ever be with this guy again, if you choose not to.
Now go beat the living daylights out of a punching bag, pillow, matress...
:slap:
Resentments are one of our big, big trigger's for a relapse.
A little detachment is in order here.
Thank the stars that you got to a computer and came here and are planning to go to a meeting...cool
You do not have to ever be with this guy again, if you choose not to.
Now go beat the living daylights out of a punching bag, pillow, matress...
:slap:
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 1,539
Chrisitne, YOU ARE NOT ALONE, this is your chance! Grasp what just happened, and decide you have learned your lesson, for the last time!
If sombody tells you something long enough, after a while, you start to believe it. Have NO part of it!
Just in the last few days or so, you have come to understand much more clearly, that hanging around the wrong people, can and will kill.
Get to that meeting, stay around sober peole, and don't call Craig back, EVER!
YOU deserve better, work on your sobriety, and your relationship with YOU!
That is ALL that matters!
Tom
If sombody tells you something long enough, after a while, you start to believe it. Have NO part of it!
Just in the last few days or so, you have come to understand much more clearly, that hanging around the wrong people, can and will kill.
Get to that meeting, stay around sober peole, and don't call Craig back, EVER!
YOU deserve better, work on your sobriety, and your relationship with YOU!
That is ALL that matters!
Tom
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
Made It !
I made it, I got through yesterday without a drink, YIPPEEE!!! Me so happy.
Right after I posted here yesterday I went to the noon meeting, it was awesome. I even stayed and had a hamburger. Then I met up with a pastor that I know and we chatted and walked around the river valley. Very different for me but it's the start of my new life and habits. I'll keep carrying AA in my pocket.
There was a woman at the meeting who is celebrating 30 years sober. I was dumb founded, really. I was amazed and want what she has. I'm looking forward to 30 days for crying out loud. I know, one day at a time though.
Wuv Christine
PS....Love this place.
Right after I posted here yesterday I went to the noon meeting, it was awesome. I even stayed and had a hamburger
. Then I met up with a pastor that I know and we chatted and walked around the river valley. Very different for me but it's the start of my new life and habits. I'll keep carrying AA in my pocket.There was a woman at the meeting who is celebrating 30 years sober. I was dumb founded, really. I was amazed and want what she has. I'm looking forward to 30 days for crying out loud
. I know, one day at a time though.Wuv Christine
PS....Love this place.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Georgia
Posts: 109
Heya Christine,
I am a complete newbie here, struggling through day one. Just wanted to say how much I admire you for your courage getting through a tough time without a relapse.
Know my thoughts are with you,
Triegger
I am a complete newbie here, struggling through day one. Just wanted to say how much I admire you for your courage getting through a tough time without a relapse.
Know my thoughts are with you,
Triegger
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 1,539
Christine! You did it, CONGRATS!!! Feels good, huh?
Focus on what yesterday was like, sober! While it will not always be easy, neither is drinking and trying to deal with life's issues drunk, or hung over.
Yes, 30 yrs is dumbfounding, but that has NOTHING to do with it. TODAY is all that matters. Sobriety for today........Stay in the moment, and take it 1_day@_a_time.........it's the only way we can string together any period of sobriety.
Sobriety is there for all of us. If we work at sobriety half as hard as we did while drinking and using, imagine what we could accomplish!
T
Focus on what yesterday was like, sober! While it will not always be easy, neither is drinking and trying to deal with life's issues drunk, or hung over.
Yes, 30 yrs is dumbfounding, but that has NOTHING to do with it. TODAY is all that matters. Sobriety for today........Stay in the moment, and take it 1_day@_a_time.........it's the only way we can string together any period of sobriety.
Sobriety is there for all of us. If we work at sobriety half as hard as we did while drinking and using, imagine what we could accomplish!
T
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
No doubt it feels good , love it!!
I liked that.....dealing with life's issues hungover...that sucks. If I would have went out and gotten peaaaased yesterday, oh man........today would have been brutal. I would have been all lonely, guilt ridden. You know what....I would have been calling the fritzin' clown and getting together with him again because I'd feel like he was all I had. WHAT-EV-A!!!! Too funny.
Yeaahhhh, feeling FAB!!!
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you very much...........
Ya I'm a goof
cc
, love it!!I liked that.....dealing with life's issues hungover...that sucks. If I would have went out and gotten peaaaased yesterday, oh man........today would have been brutal. I would have been all lonely, guilt ridden. You know what....I would have been calling the fritzin' clown and getting together with him again because I'd feel like he was all I had. WHAT-EV-A!!!! Too funny.
Yeaahhhh, feeling FAB!!!
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you very much...........
Ya I'm a goof
cc
Pretty Is As Pretty Does
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 82
I certainly am doing things differently. It's Saturday, I'm at work, had my workout and posting here . Going to a meeting at noon too.
Last night was different and uplifting. I've been attending a study group on Wed. nights and last night I was working on a lesson, it was a nice quiet, calm, reflective time.
I just hope this lasts, you know? I have this habit, that when things get too good I stray away and go nuts basically. This is a new way of life I have to keep telling myself. I'm creating a new lifestyle and that doesn't happen over night. Wish it did though.
Hope everyone is hangin' in there, I'm thinking about you all.
Wuv Christine
. Going to a meeting at noon too.Last night was different and uplifting. I've been attending a study group on Wed. nights and last night I was working on a lesson, it was a nice quiet, calm, reflective time.
I just hope this lasts, you know? I have this habit, that when things get too good I stray away and go nuts basically. This is a new way of life I have to keep telling myself. I'm creating a new lifestyle and that doesn't happen over night. Wish it did though.
Hope everyone is hangin' in there, I'm thinking about you all.
Wuv Christine
Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Southern California
Posts: 129
Wow.. You really showed me to reach out and post when you want are extremely upset. I'm hangin in there on day 3 and thinking of everyones words. Can't believe the power of the group (not)..amazing isn't it? CC you are teaching me and helping to keep me clean..thanks
Paused
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Anytown, USA
Posts: 101
read your posts christine and am so proud that as angry as you were you focused on what you needed, not what you wanted. inspiration to all of us newbies. thanks again and hope tomorrow is even better for you than today was. i thank God i found this place.
Audra
Audra
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