Chilledice

Being sober is simply not enough for me! I need some serious help from a professional and FAST. The drinking is a symptom to my trauma and the beast in my mind ( or so I believe anyway ) putting the drink down and leaving it alone is not enough! It is not just booze I need to recover from but other ''issues '' aswell, problem is the waiting list to see a therapist is AGES here in the U.K ahhhh sighhh just trying to deal with it and not pick up the bottle!

Well I have not caved but something has to change because this is a rather hellish experience right now!

Nonsensical

Just not drinking was never enough for me, either. I had to start living sober, and I had to learn how.

Hang on, Kiddo! You can do this!

Amajorityofone

Friend-

By now, you know that drinking does not make things "better." Thus, no need to drive down that road.

If real change is what you seek, dig within. Your mind will always be your greatest resource.

doggonecarl

AA believes that drinking is but the symptom of untreated alcoholism. The solution are the 12 steps.

Or have you already rejected AA as a recovery option?

Chilledice

Hmm with all due respect but for me and I can only speak for myself, AA has not worked.

Chilledice

Oh gosh no im not goona cave into the addiction no way, but I need some proper councelling or therapy etc

Amajorityofone

Friend-

Life is simple. We make it complicated. Conditions don't improve until there is self improvement. Thus, the best therapist you will ever find, will always be yourself.

Chilledice

Interesting point you have there! I know that my MAIN problem is obsession! I am truly obsessed with the past, I live it every single day and can not stop, I am obsessed with thinking about alcohol............... Now if there was a way I could go into my own mind and re wire it then that would be awesome

tomsteve

can I ask how far into AA you got? did you work all of the steps? reason I ask I can relate to quite a bit of what ya type. its how I used to be. working the steps and practicing the principles have helped me tremendously.
im not saying outside help isn't necessary. AA even recommends it and I get it myself. however, the steps helped out greatly for me.

Chilledice

I was only there for a few weeks maybe a month? this was years ago when I was 24 ( when I guess I first started having a problem ) I honestly cant remember about the steps but I do remember them basically saying to me over and over again that I need to come to terms with things '' acceptance'' of my inner demons, they just kept telling me not to drink, which obviously not drinking is a good thing but I need MORE than that! I drink to forget the pain, I need to somehow rewire my brain so I can see things differently. I need to heal and I am guessing I can only do that through the power of my own mind ( havnt figured out how to do that yet ) or with professional therapy.

Raider

I understand. The wait here for counseling help is months. I made an app and had a two month wait. After 6 weeks I got a call from his office saying all apps were cancelled because his wife became ill. Now waiting again, new app April 8. Of course, unless this one's wife gets sick.....

Sparkos

Hi Chilled.
I know about the waiting lists and was wondering, have you at least got your "name down". You may get a cancellation or something. Grasping at straws a little bit I know, but stanger things have happened. Emphasise to your GP how problematic this is for you.

Glad you haven't drank on it and I note you're posting beforehand, which is fantastic.

Pob lwc.

Chilledice

Going to Dr tomorrow and this time I wont let him just palm me off with '' take Prozac you will feel better '' I will persist with him to help me with the determination of a pitbull if I have to!

Also going to the local church victory outreach on sunday where they apparently are good with helping people with addictions.

Its a tough road but im walking it!

Anna

For sure, drinking was a symptom for me, too. And, it was just the beginning of the hard work. I had many issues to try to sort out. I would not be in recovery today had I not done the hard work on myself.

I turned to books and did a lot of reading. I began to understand that I was wounded and what I needed to do to help repair the pain in my life.


"The Seat of the Soul" by Gary Zukav...amazing book.

Chilledice

Im so sorry to hear that! I sympathise that his wife is ill however there MUST surely be a way to get you the help you need quicker! Sometimes I think the '' system '' just doesn't see the urgency in these situations!

Hawkeye13

What else are you doing for recovery?

I found I had to change my diet, begin to exercise, do stress relieving activities like yoga and meditation,
start up some activities that interested me, put myself on a sleep schedule, etc.

What is the rest of your plan and how are you implementing it?
Quitting drinking was just the tip of the iceberg for me. I had to deal with myself after that.

Doing something proactive would most likely help a great deal if that isn't part of your recovery yet.
Make it a priority while you are working towards getting the therapy you need.

A strong exercise program, going to bed early, lots of hot baths and showers, and a few weeks of excellent healthy food really helped my mental state.

Chilledice

Im drinking tons of water eating fruit and veg with skinless chicken and brown rice. I used to walk 8 miles a day but I just have no energy for that right now but I do walk my dog for an hour to hour n a half every morning.

Its just thoughts and more thoughts and MORE thoughts over and over and OVER in my head!! driving me CRAZY

But im hanging on in there!

Carlygirl

Hi chilled. I am in the uk and have accessed free alcohol counselling via a voluntary organisation. Much wider issues beyond drinking are discussed in the sessions. Have you contacted Drinkline?

Obviously I don't know your circumstances, but many employers and trade unions have confidential counselling services for their employees/members.

Or, considered self funding? Will probably cost less than your old drinking habits?

Good luck

WillB

Great job hangin on Chill! Sounds like u could really use a break by gettin out of ur head for awhile... I suggest yoga and meditation. Either can teach u to quiet ur mind.

Aellyce

One thing that has been very helpful for me is trying to identify my main issue(s) underlying the drinking problem. A mental health professional can help for sure, but if you need to wait with that, there is a lot we can do ourselves using information and tools available from books, the internet, here on SR etc, I think. I would suggest to start on this and not wait for a therapy appointment. For example, I've figured that anxiety has been probably my biggest issue in my whole life, so I am trying to find a regime that helps me manage it much better. I have also always had pretty obsessive thinking, and a lot of that is also caused by anxiety for me. What often helps is actively stopping the thoughts by distracting myself with an activity that requires focus.

Good that you are eating well and are getting some exercise, these can change a lot of things in my experience. Trauma is of course a complex issue... I hope eventually you will find a good therapist to help process that, but in the meantime better not to just wait, you have much more power over your mind than you might think!