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Workin step 3 well

Old 03-20-2014, 11:02 PM
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Workin step 3 well

Good Mrg friends,
Wanted to get some input on working this step thoroughly. Done it before but wanted more info. I understand in my faith what to surrender to Him & will now means even tho didnt do much of it before sobriety but is it any diffrent in the program?
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Old 03-21-2014, 12:00 PM
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Hi, 1newcreation--I'm not sure I have any experience that could help you with your question, but I'll bump your post back up to the first page and likely someone else w/more knowledge will be along to help you out soon.
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Old 03-21-2014, 12:52 PM
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Hi 1newcreation,

Of course your experience may vary but for me Step 3 is about surrender - surrender of my old life of control - or trying to control. It's about accepting that whatever I'm facing, however bad things get, that there's a reason. Failure is okay. So is being lonely, or afraid - it's all part of being human, and I don't have to drink to try and change what's a normal part of life. I accept it all.

In Step 3 I also accept that there is a Power in the universe running things and I'm not it. It's knowing that my struggles may not even matter in the grand scheme of things - perhaps my struggle will be a help to someone down the line, or already helped someone unbeknownst to me. Ultimately, to work the step means to simply make a decision to ask my Higher Power to use me, and then leave it at that. In my life that decision has resulted in avenues that have opened to me to be of service to others that I could never imagined would be so fulfilling.

I did my Step 3 on my knees, saying the third step prayer. It didn't take long to say but it took a couple years getting to that point where I really wanted to say it! I'm not a member of any one denomination of any religion, but I did do my 3rd step alone in a Catholic church and I can tell you it was one of the most powerful moments of my life.

I still start my day with the Lord's prayer, the Serenity Prayer and the Third Step Prayer, on my knees. I thought it was dumb at first and it certainly felt foolish, but then I realized that was pride making excuses and that going on my feelings had gotten me into some pretty confusing places in the past. I figured it was best to turn it over and just do the step without questioning it - "quit the debating club" as they say. After all why shouldn't I be on my knees when thanking this Power for getting me through yesterday sober and in asking for a sober day today? That's a freakin' miracle my friend!

I was told to just say the prayers regardless of how they felt. Even today my mind will wander at times, and sometimes I'm just saying words, but that doesn't seem to matter. I'm sober today and if I start feeling edgy I don't feel compelled to drink, but I know I need to work on getting back to simple spiritual practice.

The 3rd step was a big deal for me and the most spiritual moment of my recovery because my biggest problem was control, so the third cut the heart right out of that, and I just stood amazed at how such a simple act could so profoundly affect the course of my life. Hope it helps you sort out the way you want to go.

In case you haven't seen the third step prayer, it goes:

"God, I offer myself to Thee To build with me & to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy love & Thy way of life. May I do Thy will always."
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Old 03-21-2014, 09:47 PM
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Thanks Climber!
That's exactly what was looking to hear. Funny tho;I say all 3 prayers everyday but mostly not on my knees so thx for the challenge.
It's my favorite step of the 12 to work on & it blows my mind every time I start trying to take hold of a situation what happens when I let go so He can have the steering wheel completely
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Old 03-21-2014, 09:55 PM
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A lot of people misunderstand this step. You do not turn your will and life over to God as you understand him in step 3. You make a decision to turn your will and life over to God as you understand him.

The actual turning of your will and life over happens as a process, when you honestly and thoroughly work dteps 4 thru 12.
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Old 03-21-2014, 10:05 PM
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Wow! Didn't think of it that way till you mentioned it in that manner..very nice
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Old 03-22-2014, 05:40 AM
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oops double post you didn't see this
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Old 03-22-2014, 05:42 AM
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Originally Posted by Taking5 View Post
A lot of people misunderstand this step. You do not turn your will and life over to God as you understand him in step 3. You make a decision to turn your will and life over to God as you understand him.

The actual turning of your will and life over happens as a process, when you honestly and thoroughly work steps 4 thru 12.
.
^^^
This is how I understand the 3rd step.

But I like Climber's explanation on how he works it.

But in life as far as me working it, I try to pay attention to my spiritual guage.

If anything is bothering me I have to ask myself

Is it my business?
Is it life or death?
Can I control it? (The person, The thing)
Is it worth giving up my peace over?

Usually the answer is no.

See page 449 in the 3rd edition or page 417 in the 4th edition of AA Big Book.

Reprinted with Permission of AA World Services, inc. Page

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation-some fact of my life -unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.

Have a great day 1newcreation!
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Old 03-22-2014, 06:19 AM
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I just commented on this in the 12 step section
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