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Old 03-19-2014, 06:18 AM   #1 (permalink)
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What are you willing to do to stay sober?


There are a lot of posts asking why we can't stay sober or why we gave in. It's such an easy statement to say "just don't pick up that first drink". Tell that to someone who is stressed out and has a drink sitting in front of them.

The more important question is what are you willing to do so that you don't pick that drink up?

Are you willing to accept that there's no valid excuse that you can make to give yourself the right to pick it up? Are you willing to forego dangerous situations so that you won't be tempted? Are you willing to give up friends who you know will lead you down a dangerous path? Are you willing to get up and go do something, whatever is necessary so that you don't pick up?

The honest answer to those questions will tell you how dedicated you are to the effort.

Just some thoughts for the day
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Old 03-19-2014, 06:27 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Add to that the questions that I had to ask myself. Not saying these are all things other people need to do, but what I needed to do.

Are you willing to admit you have a problem to other people?
Are you willing to ask strangers for help?
Are you willing to accept help?
Are you willing to do things you don't want to do?
Are you willing to come out of your comfort zone?
Are you willing to change everything if that is what needs to be done?
Are you willing to honestly look at yourself?
Are you willing to let go of anger and resentment?
Are you willing to forgive the unforgivable?
Are you willing to re-try efforts that you were close-minded to in the past?
Are you willing to pick up the phone?
Are you willing to feel extremely unpleasant feelings?
Are you willing to admit you cannot now or ever control your drinking?
Are you willing to admit that the moderation ship has sailed?
Are you willing to not allow anyone or anything to "drive" you to drink?
Are you willing to stop making excuses?
Are you willing to face life on life's terms?

I could go on and on. Took me a while to be completely willing to stop drinking, as you can see. :~p
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Old 03-19-2014, 07:12 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Good question that takes self honesty to answer. I'd say all of the above + more. Many do and will only talk the talk and after a period of time disappear for more "important" things to do with their time.
I needed to go to many meetings even when I didn't want to go. I needed to get into AA and not around AA by getting probably too active speaking, chairing, doing commitments, making hundreds of pots of coffee and getting out of myself. Working the steps was an obstacle for me until I was pushed into it by people who knew what I needed. Thank you to them. Most of my response should make a decent gratitude list.
Unfortunately far too many of us forget the pain then suddenly get hit by the ism and slide back in sometimes in the future. Hope not.

BE WELL
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ALCOHOL-ISM= INCREDIBLE SHORT MEMORY.

I CAME FOR MY DRINKING AND STAYED FOR MY THINKING.

WE ARE NOT FAILING AS LONG AS WE KEEP TRYING.

WHAT I USED TO CALL BOREDOM I NOW CALL SERENITY.
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Old 03-19-2014, 07:20 AM   #4 (permalink)
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after many unsuccessful attempts at sobriety today I'm willing to do anything that it takes so as to stay sober
MM
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Old 03-19-2014, 07:23 AM   #5 (permalink)
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One thing that I still struggle with is: Are you willing to give up old playgrounds?

I keep finding myself choosing to be at bar & grills that I would hang at on the weekends with my husband where we used to drink pitchers of beer. I happen to like the food of some of these places, but after being at one this weekend during their St. Patty's Day celebration and me about to lose my mind wanting a drink, I realize I have to give up my old "fun" places - at least for now if not for forever.

Good topic.
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Old 03-19-2014, 07:25 AM   #6 (permalink)
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My friends dad is a recovering alcoholic 30 years sober. I told him that I honestly wanted to quit. He told me I didn't. I was kind of shocked at his answer. He then asked me how many meetings I've been to. He told me if I truly wanted to stop there is nothing I wouldn't do to stay sober. I've found through trial and error that sobriety is going to be a full time job for a while. I know understand what he was talking about as I sit here on day 2 typing and trying to choke down some toast.
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Old 03-19-2014, 07:52 AM   #7 (permalink)
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I've discovered that its as much to do with what i am willing to accept as much as what i am willing to do.
Am i prepared to soberly accept financial hardship, loneliness, depression, failure,illness,mediocrity, loss of loved ones and crisis of faith without picking up that alcoholic drink.
In other words, life on life's terms and not on mine.
When i can accept that alcohol is not an option even in the direst of circumstances, then i feel i am ready to accept all of the rewards of sobriety without fear or favour...

And that's why its one day at a time for me
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Old 03-19-2014, 08:23 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Well said afloat. For many of us, including myself choosing to live on life's terms is the nut of it, or maybe I should just say not being willing to live life on life's terms is why I hid in a bottle for so long. Thanks for the insight.
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Old 03-19-2014, 10:29 AM   #9 (permalink)
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thanks for this post!
I'm learning everyday what I am willing to do!!!!!

I know now that I am willing to not join the crowd. I am willing to feel bored and awkward for an evening. I also know that I am willing to disappoint others who have enjoyed "partying and celebrating" with me...this includes my husband and my friends and past/future co-workers. I don't drink now!
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Old 03-19-2014, 11:52 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I was willing to get locked up or go liven a monastery if thats what it took , anything it took is what i was going to do . It was painful to give up but who am i to expect a life but no pain ? when i look around the world my life seems relatively painless .

Bestwishes, m
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Old 03-19-2014, 04:01 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I have always used the measure. Is this choice moving me towards sobriety or away. It takes a lot work to make myself choose things that move me towards sobriety because my disease still fights tooth and from time to time
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Old 03-19-2014, 04:33 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I'm going to do whatever it takes.

I've already quit my job to get sober.
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March 1, 2014

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. - Joseph Campbell

That's the funny thing about decisions. You never seem to have to talk yourself into the right one. - Frank Reagan

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Old 03-19-2014, 05:47 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Sounds brutal but I was so miserable and at the pits of hell that I would give an arm without a second thought.

But I'll do everything else before that, I kind of like having both arms. LOL!
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Old 03-19-2014, 05:49 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I fully accept I am an Alcoholic,therefore I cannot drink Alcohol.

As an Alcoholic I won't be sitting with a drink in front of me.

I do stay away from the first drink whatever happens.I keep my recovery simple.
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