Just need a few kind words.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 9
Just need a few kind words.
I am sober for almost 6 months and my BF just told me you'll "supposedly" be sober for 6 months soon. Like HELLO he can't even give me kudos for that accomplishment. I did have a couple of meltdowns during this time which where my behavior resembled old behavior but not a drop of alcohol has passed these lips. Damn. Just need a little support. Can I get an AMEN from the choir?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Engerland
Posts: 897
Certainly a well done from me. Having similar difficulties at the mo. All's i know is that i'm not the same arse that i was when i was drinking, that i am working on making my changes and that nothing or nobody can derail me unless i allow that to happen.
Just working on self care and kindness at the mo. I always believed anything that anyone cared to chuck at me. I am a bit more selective about taking on board others stuff these days.
Don't have to be the fall-guy sober.
Well done on six months..
G
Just working on self care and kindness at the mo. I always believed anything that anyone cared to chuck at me. I am a bit more selective about taking on board others stuff these days.
Don't have to be the fall-guy sober.
Well done on six months..
G
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi Jmm, excellent achievement and it must be hurtful not to have it acknowledged. Maybe you can explain to your BF that even sober you might take some time to recover fully?
Congratulations on 6 months!!! Awesome!! I mean that; lots of people fall at the first hurdle.
Congratulations on 6 months!!! Awesome!! I mean that; lots of people fall at the first hurdle.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,022
You're doing great. Don't let other people get under your skin with negativity. Take his comment as a compliment, if sort of a backhanded one. At least he is paying attention to what's going on. It takes time for people's norms to change, just stay on course and don't let it get to you.
If this is the kind of negative feedback you get all the time, maybe you guys need to talk about changing that, or if that doesn't work maybe a change of scene is in order.
If this is the kind of negative feedback you get all the time, maybe you guys need to talk about changing that, or if that doesn't work maybe a change of scene is in order.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,506
Our normies can't possibly understand what we go through & it's frustrating. My family & friends were cynical/suspicious for quite a while. That's why SR was such a huge help. We know what you're going through and what a great triumph 6 months is. 
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Nutmegger
Posts: 1,799
You are doing great. Our sobriety is a very sensitive and vulnerable spot, and when someone knows us well and is looking to hurt us, it makes a great and easy target. How do we prove we DIDN'T do something? We don't. And I wouldn't address it with him right away, I wouldn't honor that kind of bs. Let it go for now and revisit it with him in a calm and clear way and in a manner that is assertive, not defensive.
He may benefit from your sobriety, but at the end of the day the only one who can really hold you accountable is you. Don't give away your power, you have done something that very few people that suffer with alcoholism accomplish. That is significant sobriety, you are obviously doing something very right. Amen!
He may benefit from your sobriety, but at the end of the day the only one who can really hold you accountable is you. Don't give away your power, you have done something that very few people that suffer with alcoholism accomplish. That is significant sobriety, you are obviously doing something very right. Amen!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 1,778
Six months is a HUGE accomplishment! You should be very proud. It sounds like your BF still has a lot of resentment about your drinking. Maybe he should get some help with that.
Go do something nice for yourself! You deserve it!
Go do something nice for yourself! You deserve it!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Originally Posted by jaynie04 
...... Don't give away your power, you have done something that very few people that suffer with alcoholism accomplish. That is significant sobriety, you are obviously doing something very right. Amen!
This ^
A....amen !!!!
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