Rose123

I find myself struggling with the thought of never drinking again. That 'voice' in my head says when my life isn't so stressful I'll be able to have a couple, just now isn't a good time. I'm telling myself I can't drink for 'awhile'. I know this is dangerous but maybe it's a good way for me to at least get started.

mecanix

Realising i need never drink again , i need never have to put myself through all that again , i never need to stress about the question to drink or not because the answer is no was one of the happiest days i'd had in years .

I hope you find peace and contentment as well ,

Bestwishes, m

PurpleKnight

I wouldn't concern yourself with "never again" . . . only focus on "today" . . . thoughts like that rightly so, can lead to a panic attack and anxiety as witnessed within your post.

One day at a time, from now until bedtime, that's the goal, break it down, don't burden yourself with soo much pressure!!

Dee74

If forever is too daunting try thinking of it in terms of 'I will not drink today'.
I think thats more achievable for a lot of us starting out.

Within that tho I think you also need to commit to making the same declaration tomorrow.

If you settle for not drinking 'for a while', chances are you'll end up back in this exact same position down the track.

Commit day by day each 24 hours, but resolve to repeat the commitment. Eventually forever won't feel as scary, cos you'll already be doing it.

D

HeadLump

Hi Rose

When I first gave up, drinking I realised that it would need to be for a long enough time to undo some of the physical damage I'd inflicted. I didn't really think in terms of it being forever, just not for now.

Reading here made me realise how easy it is to relapse and how futile it is (for me, anyway) to ever think of drinking in moderation.

As time has gone on, though, the desire to remain sober has grown. The physical and, most of all, the psychological benefits have been so great that I cannot now imagine picking up a drink again.

Stick with it, Rose, and hopefully before long you'll be feeling the happiness that Mecanix so rightly describes in his post above. It really is a great feeling

1newcreation

It is a good way to get started. It's overwhelming to think in those terms;absolutely
So if started today saying may be tomm but not today, will be amazed before long @ time accumulated

Aiko

Dear Rose,

I had that same worry of NEVER EVER.......... FOREVER...

I struggle with it...
How the hell I am not ever going to.... scared me to death... I will not be able to no way!!!
That though comes from your Addictive Voice,
Is just trying to convince you will not be able to do it!
the AV is trying to get you back!

But when I started to be sober as days pass by I think about it less and less.
But at the end I just concentrate in getting better now and not think about the future!

It is possible NEVER EVER and live HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!

You NEVER thought you could!!!
Rose being sober is WORTH IT!!!
Make it happen!!!

Rose123

Thank you so much for your responses. Right now I'm starting at today and tomorrow. I can wrap my mind around that a little. I have been drinking to numb the stress/anxiety/depression/bad things happening in my life and it is NOT the answer. I do have a prescription for Celexa that I've had for a month but have not taken because I didn't want to mix them with booze and, of course, I would rather drink. I am thinking about starting them now. I had to quit my job and am looking hard everyday. It's a huge cause of my stress. I do realize drinking all day is not going to get me hired. Tomorrow is a new day and the start of something great, hopefully.

least

One day at a time adds up quickly. Before you know it you'll be talking in terms of months and years. Don't drink today, repeat tomorrow, and just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

CaiHong

Rose,
At the beginning it is daunting to think of giving up booze forever, how would we cope?
Keep going, a day at a time and I promise you as those days turn into weeks months you will wonder how crazy the drinking was and how did it get to the stage that drinking was "normal".
Perhaps hard to see it now but this is my experience.

All the very best
CaiHong

NedStark

I am in a similar position to you, I only made my decision to stop yesterday. Sometimes I begin to think "How am I going to do this?" as well. It becomes daunting and ultimately stressful.

What clicked in my head was that the fact I have to ask myself that shows I am making a great choice to do this! Believe in yourself, you can do this! Day by day it will get easier and you will feel the benefits, that is what I am waiting for.

Keep strong, Rose!

Nonsensical

Every story I was told as a child ended with They Lived Happily Ever After.

It means the same thing, yet phrased your way, it scares the Hell out of us.

Anna

For me, I had to believe I would never drink again. Once I believed that, my mind began to work in different ways to deal with life and stuff. As long as I believed it was 'just for now', my thinking stayed the same unhealthy way.

MIRecovery

I can't guarantee that I will never drink again. I just don't think in those terms. What I do, is to accomplish a set of tasks every day that have kept me sober so far.

Aiko

LOVED THAT!!!!

Just realized...
You made mi Click

The NEVER is....
NEVER have to go through the pain again!
the constant obsession...
Not to worry If I am going to drink or not...
Cos I know the ANSWER IS NO.

We focus on the negative side of NEVER...
Not on the positive side of NEVER have to go through this again..................!!!!!!
Love that thought.

Thanks Mecanix

Nonsensical

Two people working very successful recovery programs very differently. That might be the best lesson to take away from this thread.

DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU!

GreenEggsAndHam

I struggled with this the first time I joined AA as well. So I tried the one day at a time mindset. I drank again very quickly. That taught me a hard nine-month long lesson. I now have zero problem accepting that I can never drink again. I was only fooling myself before, but that was just me.

As nonsensical said, everyone is different and you have to do what works for you and what helps you cope or reduces anxiety. One day at a time is much easier to swallow for some. Good luck to you!

Rose123

I find it very interesting the different mindset everyone uses to accomplish not drinking. Right now I'm just focusing on getting through the weekend. My husband is a nightly beer drinker and is having a buddy over Saturday. This usually consists of lots of drinking, talking smart and playing games. I might ask him to go over to his buddy's instead of them being here. I'm already in panic mode over the weekend.