2bhappier

I haven't posted in a day or so (oh my!) but I felt like I should say something, anything. I haven't been drinking. I am going to AA and Lifering. I am not as filled with angst as I was a couple of weeks ago about not drinking. I know I am a person who should not touch alcohol. I sometimes get a lot out of AA and sometimes I don't. I really don't have much sober time (a couple of weeks maybe? I slipped while on vacation). I find myself reflecting on the past couple of weeks. Initially I really was miserable about not drinking. Driving home from work sucked because I wanted to stop at a liquor store. Going to the grocery store sucked because there is a liquor store near the grocery and I wanted to go there.

I "think" (very cautiously saying this) I have hit a point where I am not uncomfortable with not drinking. Yes, I still wish I could but I can't.

It is kind of a strange place to be mentally and I don't know if it is good or bad. I figure the best thing I can do is just not drink and take the rest from there.

Nonsensical

How was Lifering? Their meeting concept intrigues me, but there are no meetings available near where I live.

FeelingGreat

I hear you! My most dangerous moments came when driving home. One day I was approaching the intersection where I could turn off to the bottle shop, and my mind was torn but I kept going. My life would have been very different over the last 2 years if I'd made that turn.
It's very natural that you'll feel more comfortable as your period of sobriety increased. Cravings come and go; sometimes when we expect them and sometimes they ambush us, but they do decrease in time. Every time you can resist a craving you become stronger and more confident.
Huge congratulations on your success so far.

2bhappier

Lifering is very interesting. There is only one near me, about an hour from my house. (Where I live an hour is kind of close). The participants sit in a circle and cross talk is encouraged. It almost seems more like group therapy to me. There is someone called a "convener" of the meeting and that person asks questions. There is no spiritual or religious element of Lifering and relapses are treated as something that happens and we need to figure out why they happen and what to do different next time.

That whole relapse concept is interesting to me. In on eof the Lifering meetings I went to someone had relapsed and he walked us through his thought process. For me, I don't think my relapses have been much more than I just flat out wanted to drink.

I am not sure it is good for me to go to both AA and Lifering though.

doggonecarl

Sounds like progress. The active or unrecovered alcoholic is unhappy in sobriety. The recovering alcoholic is happy in sobriety. You are moving towards recovery.

What might hasten that journey? Have you found a sponsor? Working on the steps?

Quitting drinking is only part of the journey.