Hevyn

Nate you will rise above this. You are going to take action at a young age so this won't happen again. I wish I'd stopped at 25. You are far from through with life - everything is still out there waiting for you. Please keep posting & reading here - we care about you.

topspin

Nate,
The commercial jobsites I've worked had plenty of guys with backgrounds that would make 2 dui's look like jay walking.

I like your idea of getting some face to face support (and soon.)

You can handle these next 6 months with the confidence and discipline of a Marine.

Were you about to come down here to Parris Island ?

They started a zero alcohol tolerance policy about 3 years ago. Not only for the recruits, but everyone else working there.

Take care man

natehamburg

I am actualy in Montana so it would have been san diego. Its just the fact that in oil and gas they want clear driving records now im pretty much fukd

topspin

Oh, I can see how they'd need a clean driving record, if you were operating any trucks.

I know things seem pretty damn gloomy right now, .....but , just know plenty of us have been thru the same kinda days;

....I was lucky to get in a group for chronic (multiple) dui offenders. Even tho I'd never been busted for dui.

It seemed like my life was doomed (at the time), but taking booze out of the equation gave me the hope I desperately needed.

If you can't get to a meeting tomorrow, keep checking in here anyway.

....this place saved my ass.

natehamburg

for sure i like coming here it helps with my mood.

thequest

Your life is not over unless YOU choose so. Step by step day by day. Rehab is as much about change as stopping intoxicating habits.

Have family members with multiple duis and he said the same thing. It's well over a year and he's benefiting by it costing him so much money he cant afford to keep a car on the road. Good news he finally realized he has to deal with public transportation. Bad news he doesn't worry about drinking because he has a ride home. But for a person that poo pooed public trans and it's users that is HUGE progress. It will take time but you can do it.

dirk626

If you're a blue collar guy what is your craft? No need to answer. I know several men who are self made, and by my standards, wealthy. All have one thing in common; they learned a craft and then started their own businesses. One gentleman that I know was kicked out of the Marines when he was 19 for desertion. He is the owner of a successful construction company that builds schools and hospitals. One other guy quit school in the 10th grade to help support his brothers. He learned to be a mechanic and owned several BP service stations before he retired. The only person that can put limits on your life is you.

SineadOConnor

Enough already Nate. I know you are hurting, scared, and confused. That is part of the alcohol within for right now. I've read all the posts of encouragement for you. This may sound harsh but I'm saying it gently, "stop feeling sorry for yourself." Its done, its over you made a bad choice. Abe Lincoln failed 9 times and became president. Thomas Edison fail 3,000 times trying to invent the lightbulb and when asked about those failures, his reply was this and take note Nate, "I failed 3,000 on how not to create the light bulb."

My point is, there is a lot of help out there. Now twice you've experienced how NOT to get another DUI. Your future? Choices, choices, choices! Go for it Nate. None of us here are unique. We are in charge of our own destinies. Join us? This is coming from a 2nd time around DUI'er btw. Everyday is a gift.

thequest

Cannot emphasize this enough. Second DUI is a wake up call. Too many who get napped for a DUI portray themselves as a victim especially if no injuries or accidents involved.

As far the Marines or any job for that matter. Everyone, even those who don't get a dui come to a point where they have to let go of their old dreams AND lifestyle. They have to move on or transition. It's not always planned or convenient but most do it and get through it. Most learn to live with obtainable goals and with-in their financial limitations. It's those who won't change their old habits that have the most problems.

I know 50 year olds that are acting half their age. They go to bars, concerts, sporting events etc like they're a college kid.. Problem is that they have about as much money as a college kid at age 50. They have nothing to show for a half century of life-no house, marriage, money or career. They say they have memories & experiences-try paying a bill with those. They act and talk like a college kid talking about their plans or they're waiting to get into a good job. They never grew up, matured or transitioned into adulthood. He actually complains his friends don't want to hang out anymore-because they have a career job, house, mortgage, kids and responsibilities.

There is still plenty of time for change. And you'll be surprised how time will fly once you have monthS and years distancing yourself from your last dui. It's time to move on-Good Luck!

CAPTAINZING2000

I was told early on, the first time was a mistake, the second time's a choice

caboblanco

somebody told me 50% of first timer duiers are alcoholics and that 2nd time duiers are 75% alcoholics. it seems like a ridiculous statistic to me just to justify the programs people who get duis have to pay for that assume they are alcoholics. i would say most people who get a dui are not alcoholics..most people get set up for duis these days. hardcore alcoholics are more likely to know the system and take precautions to not get one.

SineadOConnor

ditto!

FreeOwl

never seen those statistics.... but I sure have seen my fair share of "hard core alcoholics" with one or several DUIs under their belt.

I have two myself and but for a stroke of legal luck I'd have three.

Whether I am a 'hardcore' alcoholic or not, bottom line is that DUIs are kind of a numbers game and if you're living deeply enough in booze - your chances go up pretty drastically from my experience.

thequest

I'll agree there is a lot of money in DUIs and I'll be the first to advocate leniency IF appropriate. But a DUI isn't a speeding ticket or blowing a stop sign. I don't agree with check points or laws that purposely favor the police. BUT in this day and age with all the information out about DUIs, drunk driving or press release about exact locations of checkpoints(fair or not) to get caught once let alone a second or third time is a problem that needs to be dealt with. All the people I know/knew with DUIs were frequently the gamers looking for a short cut at work, would have accidents or make stupid mistakes. Or had a lot of personal problems & issues probably caused by excessive drinking or partying.

A lot of people drive drunk or buzzed and don't caught. I think a lot people who get popped for a DUI with an accident involved think why me, they play victim. But show me a person with multiple DUIs I would have little trouble showing alcohol caused problems and issues in their life.

When you are half a century old and you have nothing to show because almost all of your spare income was spent on partying or paying off dui expenses not once but a second or third time you got problems. it's not just the expenses it's the timing as well. Unexpected expense can have a domino affect on other financial issues which will haunt you for YEARS.

Longpasttime

Wow, denial much? Guess who doesnt get set up for dui's - people who dont drink and drive. I did it a bunch, finally got caught and blame no one but myself even though it was during a "heat is on" st pattys day weekend (smart, huh?)
Glad it happened too, as i have never done it again and no doubt would have.

caboblanco

I never had a dui. i know a few people that have that are not addicted to alcohol in any way. there are drunks who don't care who keep getting duis..there are people who just party now and then that don't care and get them..to say almost all people that get a dui are alcoholics is not accurate..of course they think making people who get duis go to meetings is helpful

Longpasttime

Sorry, i was kind of focusing on the set up part. I would agree that many who get duis are not alcoholics, but i guess im not sure why that matters. I will say most everyone in my dui classes had a problem with alcohol. Obviously that is anecdotal-
And it is most definitely a $ grab. I felt like a friggin reverse atm.

thequest

A correction
...
A lot of people drive drunk or buzzed and don't caught. I think a lot people who get popped for a DUI withOUT an accident involved think why me, they play victim. But show me a person with multiple DUIs I would have little trouble showing alcohol caused problems and issues in their life.
...

Apologies

Also,

I can see a college aged kid getting popped for A dui because young people are knuckle heads to borrow a phrase.

And the reaction of one or the occasional DUI doesn't make a person an alcoholic is common. I've heard people who were sent to mandatory programs and that is the typical attitude towards a non injury or non accident dui. It sounded like a how the system screwed them and how to beat them school

Again in this day and age of DUI information out there including the effects and police enforcement to drink and drive without second thought is fool hardy. Don't worry about what other people have gotten away with worry about what you got caught doing. It's the lawyer's job to worry about equal enforcement.

caboblanco

I know duis are wrong but the programs they make offenders go to are just for revenue plain and simple. The reason for the suspension or jail time is to scare other people to not drink and drive..the reason for everything else is money. drunk driving is considered like murder to a lot of

people even if the person was not in an accident...it has become a scapegoat offense. most people that complain about drunk drivers getting off so easy have driven drunk multiple times in their own lives...even a chapter leader of Mothers against drunk driving in florida got popped for a dui and blew a high number

ScottFromWI

What exactly are you suggesting here? And how does it help the OP or those in recovery?