| ZeldaFan | 03-03-2014 05:14 PM |
Four months today
Hey all! I haven't been very active on here lately other than my daily check-ins in the 24 hour club. Today I am four months sober so I wanted to share my feelings at this point in my recovery. First off, let me say to everyone just starting out that it absolutely does get easier!
I was drinking 1/4 to half a bottle of vodka a night on weeknights and up to a bottle a day on the weekends. I spent my entire existence either at work hung over and hiding from people or at home drunk or passed out. I really doubted if I could break the cycle but enough circumstances in my life finally gave me the kick I needed to try and try for real this time. I slipped a few times over the first two months (Sept and Oct) but it finally stuck on Nov 3, 2013.
I had a business trip to Vegas for a few days on the 4th and, in a strange way, that is what I think made it stick this time. I was so determined to not let my guard down on that trip and give in that it gave me a stronger determination than I ever had before. I made it a point to keep that strength and feeling with me after I returned.
It took a few months but the cravings subsided greatly and are almost non-existent today. I have gotten my life back. I'm back into my hobbies (mostly geeky computer related stuff) and my days are filled with growing my career, spending time with friends and family and enjoying the things I forgot I loved due to the alcohol.
When I finally admitted I was an alcoholic and made a commitment to recovery, I figured if I was determined enough I could do it. It was so, so difficult at first that I never thought I would actually get to a place where I was happy without drinking. I can say without a doubt that I am a million times happier now clean and sober than I ever was drinking - even at the beginning of my drinking career when it was still casual.
I can't thank everyone on this site enough for all you have done to help me along the way. Your kindness and caring as well as sharing your stories has given me the extra boost I needed to get through the hard nights and weekends early on and continues to help remind me I'm making the right choice every day. If you are struggling to break the cycle, please don't give up. Please know it can and will get better if you stick with it.
:thanks | 