Paradise lost
Paradise lost
Hello,
I'm new to this side of things.
I have long history of issues with both Anorexia and Bulimia. I have spent the 18+ years dealing with one or the other. Fortunately, on that front I have been relatively stable since ~2006. However, I have simply made a subtle change in my method of self-destruction. I began drinking vodka a few years ago after a transition into a high-stress job. While the amount I was drinking was certainly well within the means of normal, it wasn't normal for my size or intake at the time.
At some point wine was added into the mix, and before I made conscious decision to stop drinking for the first time in 2011 for 6 months, I was drinking a bottle of wine a day and 4 shorts of vodka.
I have obviously started drinking again, under the common logical fallacy that "i can drink socially"
Well, that's certainly trust if drinking 1 to 2 bottles of wine a day, starting at 10am is social drinking. (fortunately, there is no hard liquor involved)
but still this is quite the mess.
I am not sure where to begin. I know better. I have a lot on the line with school and work---and it is a miracle that no body realizes that I am intoxicated in class or at work
I'm new to this side of things.
I have long history of issues with both Anorexia and Bulimia. I have spent the 18+ years dealing with one or the other. Fortunately, on that front I have been relatively stable since ~2006. However, I have simply made a subtle change in my method of self-destruction. I began drinking vodka a few years ago after a transition into a high-stress job. While the amount I was drinking was certainly well within the means of normal, it wasn't normal for my size or intake at the time.
At some point wine was added into the mix, and before I made conscious decision to stop drinking for the first time in 2011 for 6 months, I was drinking a bottle of wine a day and 4 shorts of vodka.
I have obviously started drinking again, under the common logical fallacy that "i can drink socially"
Well, that's certainly trust if drinking 1 to 2 bottles of wine a day, starting at 10am is social drinking. (fortunately, there is no hard liquor involved)
but still this is quite the mess.
I am not sure where to begin. I know better. I have a lot on the line with school and work---and it is a miracle that no body realizes that I am intoxicated in class or at work
Hi, i tried the social drinking idea for years, never worked for either, drinking every waking moment. its part of the insanity of my alcoholic mind that social drinking was even possible. welcome to the site, tons of support here.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: minneapolis, MN
Posts: 49
your story sounds very much like mine. I dealt with anorexia and bulimia from the age of 14 on. By 25, I found mostly stability with food but managed to slip alcohol into its place. Despite being high functioning.....completing medical school and becoming a doctor with no one knowing, I was and am miserable and began realizing the alcohol may be involved in that. I don't have any great wisdom as I have been struggling to stop for a few months and am only back to day 3 today....but know that you are not alone and I really do understand what you are dealing with.
Hopefulyogi,
Thank you for sharing your story/experience. It's quite scary how much I identify with your story. I actually started drinking when I had to make the choice to go into treatment for anorexia, and walk away from medical school.
So, making the choice to recover from an eating disorder had a catastrophic impact on the plans I had.
I'm now going back to PA school, but there is still a huge sense of disappointment in myself.
It's almost like I quit in the middle of a marathon.
Thank you for sharing your story/experience. It's quite scary how much I identify with your story. I actually started drinking when I had to make the choice to go into treatment for anorexia, and walk away from medical school.
So, making the choice to recover from an eating disorder had a catastrophic impact on the plans I had.
I'm now going back to PA school, but there is still a huge sense of disappointment in myself.
It's almost like I quit in the middle of a marathon.
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