In Hell
 

I'm in Hell for sure.

behind the guy who created auto correct.

OK I told someone else this is it. So My day one is now.

Really, umm, My Dad just passed away suddenly. Last 2 weeks. Really my best friend in the world.

And I have drank an amount that is just an abomination.

I saw him and then my car broke down, not worth fixing, but some really strange things have been happening, Stuff I would never believed could.

It has me in a way that I think I cant kick it. And I have made sure it's true. 30years of hard drinking has....I don't know who I am without it.

I am jonsing already.

Deeply sorry for your loss, that must be incredibly difficult.

Well done on recognising you have to stop drinking, do you have a plan?

You're in my thoughts

I'm so sorry for your loss,that must be awful for you.

I know it sometimes seems easier to drink but it really does get better when we stop drinking. I hope you stick around

How can he have a plan in a state of PTSD?
Best wishes my friend, and please reach out.

Hi again Space.

I'm really sorry for your loss.

I didn't know who I'd be without drinking either, but I knew I wouldn't last long if I kept drinking.

I'm glad you're back on day one. You seem to do well when you check in here regularly.

Our destiny is what we make it, even after 30 years.
You can write a different ending, my friend :)

D

I am so sorry to hear about your dad.

As Flygirl said please reach out here. There is always someone here to reach out to for some support.

You don't have to do this alone.

There are lots of folks here with PTSD Flying...it doesn't make anyone incapable of reaching out for help and devising plans? :dunno:

D

So sorry for your loss. It must be the hardest time to think about quitting, something similar happened to me and I just thought, 'stop and make them proud.' xxxxxxx

I am sorry for your loss. :hug: I hope our support can help you get sober for good. :)

I don't know if my drinking caused my problems or the other way around.
I'm really in a lot, I may as well say I have to come up with 100 solutions immediately, and I hope to quit being a terrible drunk.
I simply must quit for I am now responsible for things.
Anybody want 2 beautiful cats?
I'd prefer to drink myself to death, My reasoning is pretty much gone.
So I will need to be coached away from this terrible thought.
Doctors hate Alcoholics, so many people don't understand us.
At this point I don't understand myself much.
I don't know how I'm getting through this.
Dads death was old age, a man doing too much.
I do nothing and should be in that coffin.

My friend, your reasoning must still be in their somewhere, because you know you want to stop.

Doctor's don't hate alcoholics, they're some of the few people who DO understand.

Make a descision to stop, the second you do you can begin to rebuild yourself.

You're in Hell right now, but there IS a way out. There is a world elsewhere from the one you're in.

Be strong, fight it, you can do it.

Big decisions about the future are best made sober Space.
Give yourself some sober space.

Get some rest, continue with day one - you might feel different about stuff tomorrow.

D

I am so sorry for your loss.

I have been drinking 28 years and don't know who I am without it, either. But I do know who I am with it, and that person ain't pretty.

Please keep posting here for support and to help with sobriety. I am glad you found this site. (hugs)

I'm not a doctor but I wonder whether this is PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) resulting from the very sad death of your dad, which I can certainly identify with (since i have lost my dad, my mom, my sister, my nephew, two cousins whom I loved, and three of my closest friends, all gone now all dead (and, as Ishmael said at the close of Melville's "Moby Dick," "And I alone am left to tell thee...."). Might it be TSM (Traumatic Stress Disorder), if there is such a thing, namely severe trauma brought about by drinking? For when I was drinking I often said that I was drinking "because" (fill in the blanks- "because" of my sister, my dad, my cousin, my mom, three of my dogs, two of which I had to put to sleep- the list seems endless). The brute fact that I had to face eventually was that I drank because I was or had become, an alcoholic. Years of drinking had changed my body and my metabolism so that I drank because my body and my brain insisted on it.
There are ways to stop drinking. The important thing is to choose the best way for you and take it, hopefully with lots of help from doctors and counselors (those who understand addiction) and other alcoholics in recovery.

W.

spacestation would your Dad be proud of you now? I bet he would trade places with you, for another shot at living, if he could.

Think about it.

Welcome back, Space. Good to see you again! I hope you will stick around and fight the fight. It can be done and it is worth it.

Maybe it's time to look for another doctor?

Who am I kidding, without ? I'm lost to this. I'm a realist.
Tomorrow I will try to go through the plane crash again?
For me it takes a buildup of fortitude. I'm not there.

So sorry to hear about the loss of your father. Time heals all wounds.

I really hope you'll decide to reach out and find help in your community space.

I really believe noones doomed to anything, if they don't want to be.

D

I think I know how you feel. My mom passed away. She was my best friend. It still hurts very much.

I hope you keep coming back.