samwitch

I have been around here forever. I hate drinking and all the bad it does to me and all the repercussions it has, but I'm so scared to be sober.
Don't know what to do.

samwitch

Oh well

Rickh54

Yes you do. You know what you have to do. Getting the courage, conviction and support is the tough part. Then you need a plan. A plan to move forward, a plan to leave the negatives behind, a plan to get healthy. What are you scared of?

Rickh54

Oh well? What does that mean. Oh well, you give up or oh well, you are going to face your fears head on and beat the crap outta them?

samwitch

oh well was noone gives a ****. I dont either I guess. Just am so lost

Rickh54

I give a **** about you

Rickh54

Maybe you feel no body cares, because you don't care yourself.
You have to show you want to change for the better,

Anna

You do know what to do, it's just making a decision to do it.

I hope you do.

DoubleBarrel

I hated my life too.
I kept drinking, and it kept getting worse.

Sober living is like turning a freighter ship around. It's a long slow process, but once things head in the right direction it really does get better.

veryready

Hang in there. It's amazing I can feel so low some days and great the next. Drinking allows for no great days. Sorry you are so down.

huntingtontx

We all care, that is why we are here. You need to make the decision. No one can make it for you. Make a plan and get real. It does get better. Alcohol offers nothing but trouble. You don't need that. We are here for you.

least

You know what you need to do, now you just have to do it.

Hope4Life

If you truly "hate your life" then it is time for a change. Only you can make it happen. Do it with DETERMINATION and you can make it work.

I believe most of us would say we were at the same place you are before we admitted that drinking just wasn't working for us.... I know I was.

There is a better life waiting for you.

terbo

Make a decision to love yourself, and hate your addiction, and what it does to you. Then decide to make a change, and take it one day at a time, one hour at a time, even a few minutes at a time. During each chunk of time you're sober, enjoy the feeling, and congratulate yourself for getting through that minute, hour, or day. Wake up and do it again. Very soon, you'll start feeling less and less negativity, and the fog will lift. We're here for you.

KateL

There are days when I still hate my life, everyone has them, Thing is, I hated it even more when I was drunk. xxxx

Hevyn

Samwitch I'm glad you posted. You are very much cared about. We're all here because we understand each other like no one else can.

I was scared to let go of it too. It had been part of my life forever - and I relied on it to cope. In the end it was only making me miserable. My anxiety was through the roof. The fun was long gone - I was way too dependent on it - and it was killing me. I kept going until I had no choice but to stop or lose my life. I promise you it's wonderful to be free of it. It sounds like you're ready to let go. We know you can do it. I hope you'll keep posting.

ReadyAndAble

Yeah, that was me. I couldn't imagine what life would be like without my crutch. How could I handle the bad times? How could I enjoy the good times? Socializing, unwinding after work... so much was tied up in booze. I couldn't imagine washing the car without a beer in my hand. Hanging out at a friends... how would I even sleep?

Here's the secret: it's all bullshlt. It's part of the illusion of our addiction, one of the ways it keeps us trapped. It makes us afraid of.... what? Not needing a drink. That's all that happens. It takes a while to adjust, but eventually you adapt. You discover the good times are better than ever. And the bad times are far more manageable. Seriously—ask anyone here.

I know all about that fear, but trust me, there's nothing to fear. Addiction—that's the scary thing. Recovery is a gift.

Dee74

I think you know what to do Sam - you have ideas about what to do anyway.

The problem is accepting that your life needs to change. I know it's a tough one...but don;t be like me and wait until you're painted in a corner and have choice but to change.

Some of us don't survive that.

My advice? Accept that you need to change.
Draw up a list of your options.

*see Dr
*Join AA or some other group
*seek counselling
*rehab - inpatient or outpatient.

I'm sure you can think of a few more too.

Write the list then work out what you're prepared to do, Sam

D

samwitch

thank you guys, especially Hevyn, Readyandable and Dee. Your words struck me.Mu anxiety is through the roof--either I'm drinking or I'm worried about it and always I'm anxious.

I've spent yrs convincing myself I don't have a problem, but of course I do or I wouldn't feel this way.

I've made an appointment already w a counselor and will work out the rest of the plan with him. I don;t really drink that much but I know its too much for me cause it's ruining the rest of my life. All I do is stay home have some drinks and that's about it. All the old stuff I used to do is gone.

Time to change, for good.

360shoes

I'm with you KateL. I have days I'm not so crazy about what life throws at me or other people too for that matter. That includes you Samwitch. I hate how alcohol makes people feel so bad. Hate it. I do not like it one bit that it has caused you pain and heartache.

Just reinforces how awful it is for some of us. People do care Samwich. But it can be better. Really. The beginning is hard. We are sick of living with it and scared to live without it. You just have to stop and then do everything in your power to stay away from it and work on the things that help you get better. You have a lot of people here who will walk along side you till it does.

Don't give up.