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First time seeking support

Old 02-15-2014, 10:25 AM
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First time seeking support

Hi All,

Over the past four months I have increased my awareness of the harm alcohol and drugs were causing. Even if I drank one drink I would feel crippling anxiety and depression. I wouldn't be able to sleep and I would be hungover the next morning. Because of the many negative effects, I have somewhat successfully decreased my consumption. Until last night, I had not had a drink in 27 days. I was feeling so good about my decisions and about life in general. One problem, however, was the self-inflicted isolation. The reason I abstained for so long is because I declined any social invitation.

Last night, I decided to go out for a friend's birthday. I decided I would only have a few drinks. I ended up having four drinks, a fraction of what I would typically drink. I feel awful today. I don't think I slept an hour last night and feel sick and hungover today. Worst of all, I am feeling very low and having strong depression and anxiety symptoms. I know this will pass. If anything, it is only encouraging me to get back on the wagon with even greater motivation.

My question to you all is this: how do you deal with social isolation, especially in the beginning of recovery? I have never learned to connect with others without alcohol or drugs. I am afraid to try. I am even more afraid of giving into drinking the next time I try.

Any thoughts??
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Old 02-15-2014, 11:07 AM
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welcome to SR sarahmaybe ,

I found that i was able to make better friends once i'd got sober . Most of my friends were in actual fact pub bores just like i was , all standing round drinking too much, sharing our respective stories of hardship and miseries .

Finding friends who share positive interests is challenging but there are some real nice people out there in the world who's lives don't revolve around drink and drugs .

Be brave try it for 6 months or something , all of your drink and drug friends will still be doing the same old routines , very few of them in my experience move on much so you know where they are and what that life offers …

Challenge yourself , make that positive change ,

bestwishes, m
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Old 02-15-2014, 11:21 AM
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Welcome, SarahMaybe! It sounds like you are on a good start toward being alcohol free. You will not regret it! Are there some old pastimes or hobbies that you could reintroduce yourself to, or maybe some volunteer work you could take on?
Best of luck to you.
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Old 02-15-2014, 11:48 AM
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I hope the support you find here can help you get sober for good.
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Old 02-15-2014, 12:45 PM
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Welcome Sarah. There is a lot of support here xxxxx
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Old 02-15-2014, 12:51 PM
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I find the depression and anxiety the absolute worst symptom of a hangover, just be confident that it goes and all the good feelings return in time Hang in there!

Things like fitness classes and sport are good ways to meet people, the fitness community don't tend to drink plus they often value sobriety, makes it easier to be around them when you're staying dry
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Old 02-17-2014, 08:04 AM
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Hi SarahMaybe, i had to get into new habits, instead of isolating myself at home, i would go hang out with friends at sober events, and i made new sober friends at meetings. Have you started living any kind of recovery program, be it AA or something else? Isolation wont work for very long, as you noticed, b/c eventually we have to rejoin the land of the living, but what you can learn in a recovery program is HOW to live SOBERLY. Not just "not drink". I tried the "not drinking thing" for 6 months, and eventually picked back up b/c the obsession never left me. I had THE WORST anxiety attack of my life the night after i got drunk the first time, b/c i made alot of bad decisions that night too... and the pain of what i felt that next morning was something i didn't want to feel again...I'd like to tell you i got sober after that first drunk, but i'd be lying. I went back out for 14 months... and after all that time, I am still an alcoholic. I've only been able to stay sober these past 9 months with the help of my sponsor, sober friends, and having a program of recovery. I had NO idea how to live soberly before. I think coming to SR is a great first step, knowing you need help Thats a big step. Keep coming back here, there's a ton of really great support.
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Old 02-17-2014, 08:11 AM
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At some point my body changed and even if I somehow managed to only have one, I couldn't sleep well and woke up feeling like crap. And depression always accompanied this. The fact is we can't have any. Period.

I'm still struggling with social situations especially since my job requires entertaining customers.
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Old 02-17-2014, 08:29 AM
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You need to focus on the positives, like no hangover, remembering what happened during the evening, no guilt/regret the following morning.

A lot of people have this idea of remove alcohol and somehow you'll become a hermit, never leaving the house for months, you gotta think beyond that, coffee with friends, going to see a movie etc, there are so many things that don't revolve around alcohol.

Life is there for the taking, it can be done without alcohol!!
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