Relapse Lesson
 

Hey all,

I haven't posted here in a while as I've barely given alcohol a second thought. I've kept very busy recently, and my motivational levels have risen significantly. Up until last night I had remained sober since 1st January 2014 (the longest period of sobriety I have managed in 10 years). However, last night, I drank 5 drinks at a pub for a friend's birthday. This led to an awful hangover and absence from work today.

Although I'm very disappointed with myself, this experience has reinforced the desire to remain sober; and even when I was drinking last night, I wasn't enjoying it like I used to. My thoughts were scattered when I got into bed; ranging from thinking how I could obtain more alcohol, to going for a run to sweat the alcohol out, to wishing there was someone beside me. It seems that alcohol preys on every vulnerability and insecurity we have, until we feed these fears with more alcohol to drown them out.

I'm viewing last night as a blip, rather than a disaster, however, even the smallest blips can sometimes change lives and I appreciate that fact, so I'd rather turn those blips into small positive changes everyday.

Thanks for reading.

I had many blips. Your take on it is a good one. You've learned something from it. Now you can move on to sobriety once again.
I keep in the back of my mind some of my failed attempts that led to misery and anxiety.
It's been working for me, along with reading posts like your's, for three years.

Best to you.

I am with you runner bean. A blip was often a learning curve for me xxxxx

I tend to look at drinking for what it is...drinking. Whether you call it a blip, slip, oops, relapse, setback, etc....they all mean that we willingly and knowingly drank alcohol. And when our goal is sobriety, drinking is a failure of that goal.

Sure, stopping after a few drinks is different than getting completely drunk and smashing up your car, but in essence it all starts the same way with one drink.

Turning your drinking into something positive is good - and learning from it is good as well. I just get really uneasy somtimes when people downplay drinking episodes as "just part of the process" or somehow inevitable, because it's not. Glad you learned something.

It only takes a second to drink.

Perhaps you should stay connected to Sober Recovery a little more. I don't doubt if you had posted about your intent to visit a pub you would have gotten many suggestions to avoid that situation, which would have meant you could have possibly avoided the way you feel right now.

But most of us need to learn these lessons the hard way.

Welcome back RunnerBean :)

D

That happened to me many times. I finally was disgusted & exhausted from the whole thing. Glad you are back on track Runner. You don't need it. :)

I'm glad your resolve to stay sober is stronger now. I hope you will stick around here and post before you drink. :)

5 drinks and I wouldn't even blow over the legal limit - I guess we are all different and we all respond differently to certain amounts. It is good you have recognized your relapse in an effort to reinforce your sobriety in the future, stay strong.

No one is saying it is inevitable but it does happen and lifting ones spirit and encouraging one not to beat themselves was always helpful to me. I tried and tried until it clicked. Being told off and given the impression I had failed, ergo 'this is NOT acceptable in recovery you have failed miserably never helped me one iota. I needed the inspiration to never give up. xxx

If I was a newcomer and told not to downplay my episode, I would have probably never kept on trying till I got it right.

Hey RB

I kinda agree with Scott in that any type of relapse should be viewed seriously. By the time we have that first drink, we have already relapsed in our mind. IMO, this is an opportunity to reflect back on what were the reasons for the relapse, what steps would you take to avoid those triggers in the future and whether there are gaps in your recovery program. Be analytical and calm about learning from the past.

At the same time, its also important not to beat yourself up about the relapse ! It has happened, its the past and you cant change it. You simply succumbed to your addiction. Actually be grateful that it was only one short incident and no damage done !

Learn and move forward !

Of course it is taken seriously, nobody likes it when it happens. But if you want to call it a blip or an oops because you feel more comfortable using those words then you should be allowed to. It's hard enough for some to post on here at all in the first place. I have been here a few months now, but for some reason today I have read some things that I don't much care for.

Don't beat yourself up, but take the time to determine what triggered the relapse and take steps to avoid your triggers.

Agree Kate, judgment of others doesn't help. I don't know where another person is in their journey.

Your posts are always refreshing, positive without a critical tone...

Just saw the movie Philomena (brava!).

It really was a wonderful film, and the message, to be be positive in all things, rings loud and clear, in a very beautiful way. A must see.