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Girls Weekend Away!

Old 02-06-2014, 02:31 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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I remember the first time I quit smoking cigarettes. It lasted two years. Then one day, I told myself that I had the nicotine thing all under control. I bummed a cigarette one day, and that very same week, I was back to smoking full time. It took another seven years of smoking until I finally quit for good on August 2011, this time knowing I can never have another cigarette again, not even a puff. Same goes for alcohol. I just don't want any part of it at all.
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Old 02-06-2014, 02:48 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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It's just one night but I have no idea how I'll get through it without drinking. It was kind of the point of the weekend. There is really no getting out of it as ......

Rudy,
if you have no idea how to get through it without drinking, the options seem three:
- get some idea (i.e.plan ahead, in detail. what will you do at 11:30 pm when everyone's laughing and half-drunk and egging you on to join in?? will your only response be "oh wth, i'll stop again tomorrow"? what can you do at dinner when the waiter automatically fills your glass? what will you say to your friends when they ask why you're not drinking?)
-don't go
-go, knowing full well you'll drink.
if you don't like option one and three, you're left with option two. don't go.

do NOT tell yourself that not going is not an option. it is, no matter what the consequences are. it IS an option.
don't tell yourself you CAN'T get out of it, because that is not true. it IS possible to say "I cannot go".

that this would be difficult...yes, that's likely so.

in my time not drinking i've found that it's not so much about the one big decision"i'll not drink" as much as about the little daily stuff that i do or don't do to support that decision.
if you want to be and stay sober, you can.
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Old 02-06-2014, 02:49 PM
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Originally Posted by rudy68 View Post
I hear you and I am NOT going to go crazy. I can do this
Crazy is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Kind looks like you fit. If you don't want to go "crazy" then change the variables, which would mean backing out. Alternatively, talk to your doc get some deterrent meds so you can't drink this weekend. Say you got Lyme disease and on antibiotics and can't screw with the meds.

Again, it's how much you want to be sober. Your comments don't strike me as you want to be sober more than drunk...sorry.
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Old 02-06-2014, 02:56 PM
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If you do drink and are able to control it this time you may think that moderation is possible. This is a slippery slope that will probably send you right back to where you were when you began your Day 1. What prompted you to stop in the first place?
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Old 02-10-2014, 09:40 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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So I did go and I did drink and I am now on day 2. I feel totally committed. All this weekend did is prove to me that sobriety is the only option. I'm not going to dwell on all the mistakes and drunken past behaviors. Today is a new day I'm sober and I plan to stay that way forever!
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Old 02-10-2014, 09:52 AM
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Originally Posted by rudy68 View Post
Today is a new day I'm sober and I plan to stay that way forever!
As you are challenged with other hurdles to your sobriety (and there will be hurdles), please be open to the advice and suggestions being offered.

Good luck.
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Old 02-10-2014, 09:55 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by jdooner View Post
Crazy is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Kind looks like you fit. If you don't want to go "crazy" then change the variables, which would mean backing out. Alternatively, talk to your doc get some deterrent meds so you can't drink this weekend. Say you got Lyme disease and on antibiotics and can't screw with the meds.

Again, it's how much you want to be sober. Your comments don't strike me as you want to be sober more than drunk...sorry.
Exactly, there are some definite changes and sacrifices we have to make, especially early in sobriety, that work to break the pattern of our destructive ways. When we become more comfortable in our sobriety, then we can begin testing the waters again, in certain situations and with certain people.
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Old 02-10-2014, 09:56 AM
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Are you back from your weekend? How did it go?
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Old 02-10-2014, 10:04 AM
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Oops, posted before I got to page two.

I understand the feeling of "this situation is set up for drinking" and having to deal with it. Since giving up drinking, this was my very worry. First it was NYE . . . I love champagne, what was I to do? We stayed home. Next was a dinner party with friends (again with champagne!), but I feigned a stomach ache. Whew. Made it through two events. Next was a different dinner party. Feigned having to go home and pack for a trip the next day. That worked. Next was the trip itself.

Vacation with the family. Usually a drink-fest. How would I handle it? I got there and told everyone I wasn't drinking. Hmmmm... Aside from a couple questions, nobody made a big deal out of it. They kept up with their drinking and I had bubbly water in a champagne glass. DH asked me if I wanted him to try to stop me if I asked for a drink. I confidently said, "I won't ask for a drink. I won't drink." And I meant it. The decision had been made and it was a done deal.

It is possible to be in a situation where others are drinking, if you are committed to your sobriety. It is especially helpful if you have the support of friends and family.
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