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Anyone else have this going on

Old 01-30-2014, 09:43 AM
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Anyone else have this going on

Day 11 here and surprisingly Day 10 was my hardest yet. When I first quit, the Addict side of me was pretty sly, almost encouraging me to quit... only with subtle thoughts to 'reward' myself down the road. After making it through the weekend though, the voice seems to have turned on me and now I keep having thoughts popping into my head about drinking tonight (last night especially), how I can just have one at the bar, it's no big deal, I've got it under control... etc, etc....

I know this is just 'The Voice', but the sudden change has caught me off guard a bit... going from trying to promise drinks down the road if I behave to pushing thoughts of drinking right now! Especially since it was REALLY quiet on Monday... just curious is anyone has this sort of thing going on....

GO HAWKS!
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Old 01-30-2014, 09:47 AM
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As addicts, I firmly believe we either drink to the point of alcoholism or we don't drink at all. There is no in-between, there is no moderation, there is no safety in having a "couple" of drinks. That has become an automatic losing battle for my AV when it starts talking about "you can have a one or two, come on".

Cunning, the AV is!
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Old 01-30-2014, 09:55 AM
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Agreed ClearMind, I tried the moderation thing pretty much all of 2013... not much success, so I've abandoned that approach. For me it was a crap shoot... some days I could easily have one drink with the guys, then other days I'd go for one and then something would take over, my entire goal suddenly would be to get home so I could get completely wasted (home because then I wouldn't have to drive). Literally my only focus would be on getting drunk.... have no idea why sometimes I'd be just fine and others I would 'lose it'.... but I did learn I couldn't control when or why that would happen so only option has been to give up trying moderation!
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Old 01-30-2014, 10:47 AM
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Hi, 12Mancan.

I believe it's quite common that during the very first days of sobriety, when memories of the last hangover and other mess are still fresh and body feels like crap, AV is not so loud. But then, after some time, it starts fooling us again that "we are ok let's have just one drink". Don't listen.

Best wishes to you.
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Old 01-30-2014, 11:00 AM
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Originally Posted by 12mancan View Post
sometimes I'd be just fine and others I would 'lose it'....
Don't lose it this weekend!
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Old 01-30-2014, 11:05 AM
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Thanks guys... honestly I feel pretty strong/confident right now... but just when I thought I sort of had the voice in my head 'solved' he sort of switched up on me, so I was curious if anyone else could sort of sense it switch tactics!

Almost like the AV knows it's losing so got really aggressive yesterday.... if that makes sense! We got this though! Thanks for all the support!

GO HAWKS!!
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Old 01-30-2014, 11:06 AM
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This happens to me every time I try to stop.
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Old 01-30-2014, 11:09 AM
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12man, this is just one of many hurdles that you can and will get over. We all have our weak moments, but just take it one day at a time. Don't listen to AV and keep posting.
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Old 01-30-2014, 11:24 AM
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My AV is all over the map. One day he's like, "Wait it out a few years - good idea!" Next day he's like, "Nobody will find out for 3 or 4 hours!"

He really is a d!@khead. Base, low-life, snake-in-the-grass, knife-in-the-back, skunk. I take comfort in knowing I am slowly, but surely, starving him to death. No one will mourn his passing.
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Old 01-30-2014, 02:16 PM
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Hi. I've had this. I was feeling pretty free of urges or cravings for most of my first few weeks. In fact, for a couple of months. Then suddenly the other night my AV voice was telling me that I can have a glass of wine. I'm not really an alcoholic. That I could enjoy a glass or two and be done with it.

That is my big fat AV liar talking. There is no way on earth that I could have only two glasses of wine and be done with it. Two bottles, maybe, but not two glasses. I have to play out the tape of what would happen. Don't listen to the big fat liar! I didn't and I am glad.
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