I am not Superwoman
 

Well, life is still moving along steadily and soberly. I made the Deans list in University, and this is quite the accomplishment for this girl. Its been all work and little play. My birthday was spent with my head in the books writing a paper. I would not have it any other way honestly. It has been awhile since I checked in here.

Life is not bad but its not all rainbows and Unicorns either. I was fired from a side job this morning.....I cant say that its not my fault. I honestly do not have the time for it with school and work. The side job is not resume material and it is nothing to feel all that bad about, but I do feel bad.

I have to remember that I can not extend myself into so many directions and expect everything to be alright. I know that I am a creature that needs stability and needs to be able to focus 100% on the tasks in front of me. If pulled in many directions, I get unsettled and overwhelmed and this makes for a scatter brained person. So, at least now I do not have to worry about those few hours on the weekend driving, setting up, and promoting while worrying about the time I will need for the paper or final that is due. I just cant expect to be Superwoman. If I could of done better, I would have. Right?

So, still sober and still working at it. I hope all this pays off (the schooling) I hope I am making the right decisions in my life. I think I am, but I cant help but to wonder.

You are a superwoman, Miz)

And sometimes we need to make a step back to look around and move forward. Now you can focus on more important things in your life.

Sending you positive vibes.

Take care of yourself.

My only qualm here is the lack of forsight. I got caught up and didnt tell myself the truth or anyone else. I thought I could do it all and still focus on the necessary, like grades and work plus the side work. Its a lesson learned. I am reliable but have proven to myself and others that the demo work is not my main focus. Main focus: sobriety, school, work, family, and maintaining positivity.

All I can say is AMEN and it is a good thing you are realizing this now. I am WAY too overextended myself.

Mizzy ,
I know you do a lot and also deal with the pain problem . You are a super - woman :You_Rock_

I also wonder if what i'm doing is for the best .. At least we are taking the leap of faith . I do it every morning when i wake up and know that sobriety is for me today :)
With sobriety i have the chance to live fully today .

We can only do our best , my over achiever perfectionist drunk sometimes needs a push down , Not saying thats how it is for you , just me :) and life tends to put lessons in my path … i try not to learn them the hard way but am only human …

Keep on :You_Rock_

Bestwishes, m

Well done on the Deans List, Mizz ! As you say, keep your eyes on the prize. We all only have so much time available so use it wisely ! Maybe that is what you were telling yourself subconsciously.

P.S. I still think you are super !

Congratulations on your accomplishments AND not drinking in pursuit of them!
Your main focus is needed by so many of us in recovery because many of us are so driven to be beyond a healthy normal human being one day at a time and soon "forgets when."
:c011:

BE WELL

Oh, you are doing fabulously. The education thing is so important and I am really rooting for you there. Crack on with it and have a great life xxxxxxxxxxxxx

You aint gonna convince me of that. :)

You are a HUGE inspiration. But, every so often, we have to go gentle with ourselves. Probably more than that.

Take care of you friend.

XO AO

The dang DEAN'S LIST!
That's great. Savor that one. Bask in it. Sa-weeet.
The side job - hey sometimes things don't work out. That's business.

Mizzuno, you have learned a valuable and I believe, essential lesson. Like you, I had always done it all, and believed that I should and could. Accepting that I could not do it all was a big step for me and learning to say 'No' literally saved my life.

It was the beginning of knowing and accepting who I am.

Congrats on making the Deans List Miz :)

D

Yes, I do think this is a valuable lesson. I also believe that from this moment forward (this morning actually) I will no longer extend myself in the ways that could be fatal to my mental and emotional well-being. I am prepared and ready to say "No." I do not want to burn bridges, or to have people think I am unreliable. This is not who I am as a person and it hurts to see that I did this unconsciously.

I remember Mecanix saying to me, months ago, that I needed to be careful about how much I was doing. I did listen to this, but I see that I did not adopt it into my conscious. Now, I believe that everything that I had taken on into my life, work, school, side work business, and whatever else was overcompensation from my last day of drinking. And, that I needed to bring in the money.

Thank you all for the positivity. Thank you for the support. This community is a great place for feedback, being authentic, and achieving the same goal, Sobriety.

Life works in mysterious ways, maybe this is something you were meant to do for a short time to learn something and you did and the universe is telling you to move on to something else now :).

This small little box is now closed and now you can open another new box.