Hello everyone, new to this site
 

I felt it difficult for myself discussing my drinking problems with real life family and friends, so thought I'd join a forum to share some of my own experiences and hear other people's stories.

I'm a 31 yrs old European male; I'm married and we have a 2 yr child. I have had many shifting jobs over the years; my background is within the humanities (university degree).

I have been drinking too much on/off for the past 10+ yrs. A few months ago, I went through my first clinic detox, but I refused counseling. Since then, I have been drinking regularly, although I have now kept sober for a few days. My drinking has caused me many problems over the years.

Looking forward to hopefully getting to know some of you a bit. All the best.

Welcome 2012Starlight! You are in a good place here. Most of the U.S. is asleep right now, but will be along soon to say Hi. Stick around! :)

Welcome! I'm in the US and should be sleeping but Netflix and Youtube are keeping me up. This is a cool little place. You'll like it.

Sounds like you went against a treatment recommendation. Perhaps you wanted to drink a bit longer following detox. What's your current plan to deal with your problem?

Welcome 2012Starlight xxxx

:welcome

You've come to a very friendly and supportive place. I hope the help you find here can help you stay sober for good. :)

I was due to go through a 5 week treatment program (Minnesota) following my detox period. I ran away from the detox place after the first night staying over and being given a lot of 'come down' medication for my withdrawal symptoms.

I was then sober for around 4 weeks living back in my own house, before dropping back a little bit, i.e drinking around 20 beers/glasses of wine daily (no hard booze) for around 4 weeks, had some sober days then/ some days drinking a little less. Now trying to stay stone cold sober and seeing how long I can do this.

But yes, I refused the treatment program as I simply didn't believe in it deep inside. It probably sounds wrong to most of you guys (not judging any of you, mind you). We're all individuals, at the end of the day.

Welcome to the Forum!! you'll find loads of support here, great to have you onboard!! :wave:

Welcome to SR :)
I think there's a direct correlation between lasting recovery, and the amount of support you have, the amount of positive changes you can make in your life, and the amount of effort you put into it all :)

D

Welcome

Welcome Starlight. Wondering why you dont believe in the treatment program? Maybe you do not fully feel that you have a problem yet.

Welcome, Starlight. You'll find plenty of wisdom, information and support here :wave:

Welcome, Starlight. I am glad you are here with us. :ring

Yes we are. Our choices must be our own, in order for them to have meaning.


I quit drinking countless times. I believed it was just a matter of deciding to do so. But, no matter how hard I tried I always found myself drinking again. I found I needed to look very objectively at how I came to be drinking over and over again after a firm resolution not to do so. When I took a cold hard look at it, I found patterns. But even those insights were useless without a plan. And even then, the plans failed early and often. I found I needed to do what others had done, and done successfully, in order to put it behind me. Still, it had to be my choice to follow in their footsteps.


I'm much less interested in what you have done than in what you will do in the future. Pick a plan, any plan, even one of your own invention. But I would recommend that you have one, follow it, and learn from the results. I hope it does not take you as long as it took me.


All the best to you.

This has something to do with it. I can still decide to quit on my own, for instance. More chronic alcoholics don't even have that choice anymore, as I've read.

Oh there is a choice. Plenty of chronic alcoholics drink themselves to death. Just like some moderate drinkers choose to stop drinking. Most people tend to quit because they finally see the negative effect drinking has on their life, or because of serious health issues.

What I meant was that some chronic alcoholics are not able to stop, unless they willingly hospitalize themselves and get sober in a controlled medical environment. They might end up dead if they don't drink, due to the physical/mental strain of trying to quit. The first step has to be made by the individual, of course.

"but I refused counseling"

Maybe your mistake? Don't take it from me. I'm drunk, miserable and am looking forward to my day 1 tomorrow. But this stood out to me.

It was my decision at the time, the one that felt right.

I wish you the best of luck if you want to get sober!

Did it feel right out of genuine motivations or was it a way to avoid quitting using? Be honest with yourself. No need to spill personal things you don't want to share here, but at least be honest with yourself.

And maybe it did feel right but it was a mistake after all. It happens to all of us. "God, I should have done that!". But there's always a new opportunity.

Thank you for the encouragement! I just figured, I know well enough what it's like to be drunk and it's not a good thing. So no need to continue it.