I made it through Friday night without drinking
Kaleidoscope eyes
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London
Posts: 5,243
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Rural Colorado
Posts: 376
Thanks! I am truly worried about staying sober. I hate to even admit it but I have these thoughts that say just have a glass of wine tonight and start again tomorrow. I know it is the AV and I HATE it. It is so convincing. I have to take my daughter to pick up girl scout cookies later today and we're passing the liquor store on the way. I feel these thoughts creeping up about stopping and buying wine. It is embarrassing to admit. I don't want to drink but I am terrified of what happens if I do. Then I think I should give no power at all to those thoughts, just accept them, and forget about them. Easier said than done. Anyway, the nervousness is about the struggle between what I am sure is the AV and who I want to be, sober.
Why is it that every time I write I feel like what I am saying is incomprehensible? Ugh.
Why is it that every time I write I feel like what I am saying is incomprehensible? Ugh.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Rural Colorado
Posts: 376
I tried to edit my last post but I wasn't successful so I wanted to add that I am also worried that if I did drink I might be too ashamed to come back here or to see my AA friends for coffee tomorrow. I don't judge others so why am I so hard on myself? My best bet is to ignore the AV, bypass the liquor store, and have a day 7. But I am afraid.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Always remember that SR is here 24/7, keep in your mind that before you may have "that drink" that your afraid of you can always post here BEFORE doing anything!! . . . that's what support is all about!! 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 246
my two cents for what its worth. I am not even a month in 25 days now with a poker party in 3 hours...do I worry, yeah. We all have to face things that are hard for us. Its really the fears we chase down and vanquish that give us a sense of accomplishment and peace. I have already planned my sober Sunday morning with breakfast out and a movie that will be my reward for not drinking...silly but it helps me stay motivated. Plan ahead, be kind to yourself try not to white knuckle it - I think the AV loves when we try that...If we slip well, so did someone else here at one time or another and I have never seen anyone get a virtual lashing for it. Shame is a slippery beast...it hides in weird corners, its not who you are its a just another feeling...next time you feel it look at the clock, see how long it takes to pass...your brain will get bored and move on to something else. I might have my share of clock watching tonight but i see it as a challenge not a burden. stay with it!
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