brit789

6 days in. Feel good. Not worried about this weekend bc I started a 7 day cleanse today so I couldn't drink if I wanted to. The last few days I have been getting really irritated with my husband. Everything he does makes me mad and I keep thinking of things that I can't get over from the past the make me resent him. Is this related to quitting drinking and smoking or am I just crazy?? I feel bad. Trying not to let him know how peeved I am but it's tough!

DoubleBarrel

There is a good reason that the 4th step in AA deals with resentments.

Im not saying that you need to do AA, but theres a long understood connection between resentments and drinking.

brit789

I don't even know what the 4th step is. I've been to a handful of meetings but usually after an embarrassing night out or something. Never went consistently or tried to follow steps.

DoubleBarrel

For me, holding on to resentments is dangerous to my sobriety.

The truth is, your husband, if you believe you are alcoholic, has probably been through a lot with you, and has issues with you too.

I can tell you this, sobriety in a relationship is a long road if there's a long history of drinking.

Do you have a counselor, or someone you can see as a couple? Or are you willing to try a 12 step program or therapy on your own?

Working on yourself won't get you sober, but it can certainly help you stay sober.

mecanix

Obviously i don't know your husband but for me I was angry at everyone and everything for about the first 5 weeks of sobriety , up and down like a yo-yo .

It gets better with time in my experience, and if we realise when we are getting wound up and then can start to back off and unwind ourselves it's a good skill , it take practice, but it can be done .

Stick with it ,

Bestwishes, m

Nonsensical

After just 6 days the emotions are still pretty raw and the alcohol-induced anxiety is pretty high. Don't do anything about it for a few weeks - at least nothing that can't be un-done.

Once I rifled through the house until I found a set of car keys that had not been well-enough-hidden for my own protection, and then drove to the store drunk to buy some more. My wife confronted me at the door when I got home and demanded the keys, so I threw them into the garage and told her to go find them if she wanted them so damn bad. Next day I woke up on the floor in a pile of empties. I had broken two picture frames when I had fallen the night before. There was spilled beer on me, the sofa and the carpet. The kitchen was a wreck. I decided to sober up and 6 days later I couldn't believe how annoying my wife was.

BradJustBrad

My irritability was at a peak at the end of my first week. I pity anyone who came across my path those few days. It quickly dissipated for me. I hope you find the same!

KateL

I felt exactly the same. Give it time. Many people are glad they weren't too hasty and everything worked out. In my case it didn't. After years I still couldn't stand him. xxx

Ruby2

I felt like strangling everyone that crossed my path when I first stopped drinking. My kids, my cats, random strangers, particularly my husband but he is an alcoholic who was still very actively drinking when I stopped.

Things got better after a week or so. I am sure that I will have the same feelings when I try to quit smoking.

Dee74

Like everyone has said it's kinda common - try focusing on the things you should be grateful for - I usually found that a great lesson?

D

KissMyTiara

Probably not a good time to start a 7 days cleanse. If its what I think it is you won't be eating much or anything and thats just going to make you hungry and cranky.

Skye2

It's probably withdrawals - but hell - he's a MAN - they were placed on this planet to irritate the crap out of us

Hang in there and stay calm

DG0409

I read the title of this thread and thought, "Yep, sounds like day 6."

At that point, my emotions were out of whack, it was next to impossible for me to refocus my brain on stuff and bf was driving me NUTS!! It did get better. Although bf can still drive me nuts, it's not at all like it was.

least

Six days is very early in recovery. Give yourself more sober time to 'settle down'.

OldRocker

Yep definitely related. My wife and I quit drinking at the same time and were constantly arguing and shouting at each other over absolutely nothing. Hang in there, you'll pass it

Blaizze

I am dealing with the emotional rollercoaster right now as well. I am on day two. It calms down after the first few weeks. Can take up to 30 days for your body to fully detox, and that wreaks havoc on your nerves. Take a deep breathe and try to calm yourself down. Meditation can help ground your nerves again.

Pipping

I was just the same with my husband and in truth I had been annoyed with him for years. Our relationship is the best it has ever been. I am 3 months sober. I have also realised that I am not perfect and have been no prize to live with for many years. The first month is tricky but it gets better. Try not to take it out on your husband.xx

DanicaB

I'm feeling the same way. I'm wondering how we can continue our marriage without me drinking on the weekends so that I can "like" him once in awhile. I'm thinking I've used alcohol in this way for our entire 8 year marriage. I was even drunk the first time he kissed me. I might have to go to counseling but not sure if that will work. I don't want to hurt him because he's so in love with me, but there's no chemistry between us

brit789

Ugh today is even worse. This is the one day I get to sleep in and he wakes me up by flashing lights, slamming doors and yelling at the dog. My nerves are so shot. I need a punching bag or something!!

brit789

I just give up.