Withope

Dippy, you don't need one more last drink. You need to take care of yourself, at least for your children's sake. You said their father has abandoned them, well what if something happens to you? Who will they have? Stop listening to AV, he doesn't have yours or your family's best interest. He's just a selfish jerk who will deceive you and leave you struggling with self-hatred and guilt once again.

We're here for you, please stay strong

Dippy

Tomorrow is a new day.
I think it's easier to be aware of my limitations than to know what I can say I will do to contribute to staying sober. Seeing my alcohol worker tomoro will help, and I will mention this forum today.
If I was to keep in regular touch on here, which part do I go to to post on?

Dippy

Can't do AA as compromises my work position.
That's why I came on here..but I feel self indulgent now. It needs to be real life face to face support, do you think?

Dee74

I was just firing out suggestions

Some of us (like me) do ok with just SR dippy - i hope you will too

D

ScottFromWI

Drinking will eventually compromise your work position too if you have a problem with it.

My point is you may need to change yourself to fit sobriety, vs everything else changing to fit you. And you may need to do things that you feel uncomfortable with. There are many people in high profile positionss that utilize AA without compromising their work. There are even online AA meetings. SR is another option, as well as some of the self-paced/secular methods which you work on largely on your own.

feeling-good

Dippy

Hi - as a fellow Scot and mother, I just want to reach out to say hello and to say I wish you the best in your journey to sobriety

I'm tired too, but not from alcohol, just because it's late!

Carlygirl

Hi Dippy

I didn't TOTALLY feel it but on balance felt it was best to stop drinking. I planned some support and have not had a drink, one day at a time, for over three weeks now.

You have many reasons to stop, not least your children and risk to your job.

I had similar reasons. I have done it and you can too. Join me.

Carly

Btw, if your employer has arranged alcohol counselling as a result of you admitting you have an alcohol problem, there will probably be conditions attached e.g. Comply with treatment. If you have further incident at work due to alcohol you may find there was a once only chance to avoid disciplinary action.

Hope4Life

Please Dippy, you have children that are counting on you and you alone......
don't pick it up again after you already have a good start towards sobriety. It will get easier but you need to give it some time.

Don't know if you saw this thread but please read the first post. I find it to be a very good explanation of the voice in your head telling you to have one more drink (Your AV or Alcoholic Voice).

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...r-disease.html

ReadyAtLast

It will in time and it won't be pleasant. It may not be a slap on the wrist or losing your job or you becoming seriously ill and dying young leaving your children without you too ,though of course these are all real possibilities.

If you are drink driving then you will eventually get caught and it's an automatic minimum 12 months ban,court attendance,name in paper etc. That's assuming you're not in an accident. you could kill or paralyze one of your children or someone else's child. You'll be looking at a hefty prison sentence then and your children will lose their mother as well. Pretending it won't ever happen to you is naive at best.

My comments are not judgmental-I lost my licence 20 years ago for drink driving so have been there. Sadly,it did not give me the jolt I needed to stop drinking at that time.

Many people on here give up for their kids,I know I did but now have such a better life I stay sober for me too. Your kids only have you and this thing gets worse and worse -it takes our physical and mental health.Your children deserve the best mum they could and should have. 'Functioning' alcoholic imo is just an excuse to keep on drinking and a term used by people who haven't lost everything just yet. Are you really functioning though? From your op it seems you're very close to losing everything. Think how much better you will function sober.

As others have said,maybe stop concentrating on what you can't do and looking at your next drink and focus on what you can do and need to do. It doesn't have to be AA ,just do what works for you. If you have an alcohol support worker though then perhaps there are resources available through her.

Post on SR as often as you like ,all day and night if needs be. I would also recommend the monthly class for people quitting this month as everyone there is at the same position and going through the same thing.

IreLander

Heya dippy, I planned my last drink this past Monday and all I got was my first DUI. I hope you decide to stay sober from now on. I CAN get worse. Trust me.

Dippy

Thank you all. I did drink last night, only drank what I bought and could not go out to get more as children were in bed (have done that before but never again, just a quick pop to the shop...what was I thinking). It was not a magical last drink....but I really want it to be my last one. I am listening to you all. I want better for myself and my children.

Dee74

Congrats on joining us on day one Dippy
D

Dippy

Thanks dee..do I keep posting on here or join a different part of sr?

ReadyAtLast

Keep posting here Dippy-It's newcomers though the monthly class is good too -January 2014 class.

Dee74

You can post anywhere you like Dippy...Newcomers is certainly a good place to hang out in

The January thread Ready mentioned is here

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-5-a.html

come join us!

D

Dippy

Am looking forward to waking up tomoro with a clearer head. Sleeping well tonight too.
Isn't it odd the people that resist you stopping drinking though...my friend/ could be partner says things like ' you've done so well not drinking all week, relax, have a drink..it's all in control'. Am going to speak to him in a bit about that is not straightforward for me. Good alcohol counsellor session today..I do want to do this and don't think I can ever drink ' normally' again. When people speak to me about controlled drinking/ drinking within the recommended health levels, a voice in my head says 'well what's the point in drinking then'.

Imabuleva

It sounds like your friend either isn't an alcoholic or doesn't understand alcoholism. For an alcoholic, "relax and have a drink" means "time for a binge."

At least that's the experience with the alcoholic I know best... me

Congrats on taking this step forward, Dippy. There is a lot of great support here.

Dippy

Really... I have just told him (friend) that my drinking again was a problem this week. He went out to move his car and came back in with a bottle of wine! I just bleated out are you joking me? He said he had set his heart on having a drink tonight but could put it back in the car and we could just drink water. Good idea I said, rolling my eyes. He has gone to put it in the car. I said drink ale in front of me if you like, but not my favourite drink. Am going to speak to him tonight about being more supportive..if he does not want to, well that says enough..

Nonsensical

My wife was nearly as difficult to convince as I was that I could never drink normally. My style of using alcohol is as dumbfounding to her as her style of using alcohol is to me.

ReadyAtLast

Good on you for not drinking tonight Dippy