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Old 01-21-2014, 01:25 PM
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Question Brand New at this

Today I went to my first AA meeting. I'm 30 years old and don't know how to have "fun" being sober. I was told once at a party when I was 21 that I wasn't as much fun when I was sober and I've never forgotten it. I'm scared of losing friends over this, having problems in my marriage, and not ever feeling zest for life or excitement over anything. But I couldn't live the alternative any more. I guess I could, I just don't want to. I sleep like crap when I've been drinking, I lose all interest in activities and things I normally enjoy. I gain weight and become exceptionally moody. My health suffers and I lie more to people. I don't exercise and I always gain weight and puff up. I will always be an alcoholic, but I want to be a sober one.
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Old 01-21-2014, 01:31 PM
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And, you can be. And, there are endless ways to have fun sober.

Yes, things will change in your life, probably quite a lot, but for me the changes were so welcome and beneficial.
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Old 01-21-2014, 02:42 PM
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I have much more fun being sober and it's real. xxxx
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Old 01-21-2014, 02:48 PM
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It'll take time, but with a change of lifestyle away from one facilitating consuming alcohol, we'll build a new lifestyle for ourselves!!
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Old 01-21-2014, 03:00 PM
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I love being sober Cheydinhal - but it takes a little while to build a sober life.
I doubt many of us would stay sober if we felt we lost out on the deal.
I was told once at a party when I was 21 that I wasn't as much fun when I was sober and I've never forgotten it.
9 years is a long time to hang onto one remark by a person who was probably drunk at the time

I expect you've been drinking for years - give yourself a decent amount of time to get sober, stay sober and learn how to have fun without the bottle.

you won't regret it

Welcome to SR

D
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Old 01-21-2014, 04:13 PM
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Learning to live sober takes some time and effort but it's so worth it. I love living sober and wish I'd done it sooner.
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Old 01-21-2014, 04:25 PM
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Welcome and congrats on stopping. keep hanging around here.
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Old 01-21-2014, 04:26 PM
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Welcome Chey. You found a great place for help - you're among people who understand what you're going through.

I was so afraid to let go of it too. I finally admitted it wasn't doing a thing to make me happy or carefree. The old days of it being fun & relaxing were long gone & never coming back. In the end it was my enemy - and it had to go. It's so good to be free of all the problems and uncertainty. You can do this!
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Old 01-21-2014, 04:43 PM
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Welcome Cheydinhal, a day at a time, try not to think of life without alcohol, just today, this day, baby steps.
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Old 01-21-2014, 04:51 PM
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I have more fun, more laughs, more socializing and generally more memories while sober than I ever did while drinking!
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Old 01-21-2014, 05:11 PM
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I had the exact same fears as you about having fun and socializing. And the exact same result as Sugarbear. I have way more fun now!

You know how when we're drinking, we sometimes think we're the funniest, smartest person in room? Well it turns out, when everyone except you is drinking, you really are the funniest, smartest person in the room.

I've been on this site for about three years, and never heard one person say they regretted quitting. You're going to be really glad you did this!
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Old 01-21-2014, 05:24 PM
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I'm sorry someone said that to you. People say that to me to this day. It's common when THEY want to feel comfortable. There is nothing wrong if you're more introverted because you're sober. Many people who drink normally are introverted.
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Old 01-21-2014, 07:05 PM
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Wow I love this response...going to print the last set of sentences for fridge!!!
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