On the heels of my "fun" weekend...sigh
 

Just had a "fun" weekend with visiting friends. And though I've been trying out sobriety for the last few weeks, my husband was a good sport about my drinking this weekend. Oddly enough, I had told my friends in advance that I could not drink on the weekend and they were very supportive. I lasted about one hour into the visit before the vodka came out. Of course I drank more than everyone else combined. And, of course, my weekend carried into Monday and I went and bought my bi-weekly box of wine. So there I am, sitting and chatting with my boys when my husband walks in from work and the first words out of his mouth are "Where is it? The wine?" I tell him and he retrieves it and announces that the kids are going to watch me dump it down the sink. I realized that I had no rights to feelings of anger, shame, embarrassment...I have made my own bed. I suppose that my husband decided that rather than trying to ignore my problem, it is better to outright acknowledge what the kids are well aware of. But nothing is quite as sobering as trying to explain to your 12 and 6 year old that while wine and other alcohol are not always bad for everyone, they are bad for me because I have a sickness.

I think your husband creating a bit of accountability for you was a good thing, there are soo many posts on SR about spouses drinking in front of people or not taking things seriously, or spouses not even knowing about the problem.

Getting the kids involved could have been done a bit better, but I guess his heart was probably in the right place!! :)

Anyways, pick yourself up, and go at it again!! you'll get there!! :)

Thank you for your honesty. I can completely relate! I went through something pretty much the same in front of my 9 year old a few months back.

You are brave for coming and sharing your experience. I am sadly back at day 1 today, but ready to do what needs to be done to stay sober. We can do this together!! ;-)

I'm glad you survived your 'fun' weekend without serious consequences. :hug:

I guess I am wondering if any of your friends questioned why you had decided to drink after telling them you wouldn't?

I can think of a lot of things that are more sobering than that, and you can read about them here on pretty much a daily basis.

I think the most important thing you should ask yourself is if you learned anything or have any plans to keep this from happening again. To be honest it sounds more like you are just annoyed that your family interrupted your drinking.

My friends didn't have to ask...they are equally aware that I'm a raging alcoholic. But they only ever see the good days...so my drinking does not negatively impact them. As for the comment about being annoyed by my family interrupting my drinking, yes I'm sure that is part of it. More importantly though, is the realization that from this point on, if my children see me drink, THEY will ask me why I'm drinking. So yes, I have plans to keep this from happening again. And I'm terrified that I won't be able to. As of this moment, there is not a drop of alcohol in my house. And for this moment, I'm surviving the urge to change that. It's a start...

I wish you luck with it. Keep at it and you can win xxxxx

to be honest, the public dumping of the wine thing strikes me as needlessly brutal, but if you're ok with it I guess it served its purpose Cruella.

what kind of plans, Cruella? :)

D

I also disagree with what your husband did, though I do understand the frustration of family members.

I thought it was interesting that you said you'd been trying out sobriety for a few weeks. For me, trying out sobriety was a disaster. I had to believe that alcohol was no longer an option, ever, no matter what. Then I could began to wrap my head around sobriety.

Good plan on having no alcohol in the house. :)

It has now been 22 hours since my last drink. I want to make it to 23...and then 24...and so on. I will be here at SR for every waking hour if need be. That's my plan...it's all I've got right now. I had only had 3 days of sobriety when our company arrived on Friday. I was in no place strong enough to maintain my sobriety...our get togethers have always involved drinking...mostly at my encouragement incidentally. I discussed my alcohol abuse with my 2 best friends of 20 years, and they want to support me. Neither of them drink to any real extent. Nor does my husband. Nope, it's the husband of my best friend that is my fellow partier. No blame, my decision, but next visit I'll be more explicit in my request that they don't bring vodka...by then I should have at least 3-4 months of sobriety behind me. They live a distance away so we only get together about 2-3 times/year.