Just Checking In
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Glasgow, UK
Posts: 362
Just Checking In
Hello all,
I've not had much chance to be on for the last few weeks as I've had the company of my better half. He started a new job today and the house is quiet again so I thought I'd come on and post some thoughts and say hello to everyone!
I'm now somewhere between 4 and 5 months sober. I finally stopped counting weeks (and days) as the exact amount of time I've been sober has become less important to me than what being sober means for my life and those around me.
To stop me rambling on (as I tend to do!) I thought I'd list some things I've noticed in the past few weeks about my recovery:
1. Christmas and New Year were hard but I made it through. The cravings weren't as bad as I thought they would be but my 'bitterness' about other people being able to drink without problems blindsided me a bit. I'm trying to work on that and I'm sure it'll get easier as time goes on.
2. Given what I learned at Christmas this year, next year I will change the holiday period plans to make them more rewarding for me as a sober person.
3. I've been having a wry smile internally when I talk to people who are struggling with their attempt to give up the booze just for January. I feel their pain....and a lot more!
4. I love FOOD, coffee and exercise!
5. My other half continues to drink often in small amounts. This didn't bother me until one day recently I thought about it and decided it was a bit insensitive and since then it's been niggling at me.
6. I completed a 16 week counselling course for anxiety, depression and self esteem issues and the progress has been amazing. I don't recognise the person of 4 months ago.
7. I went to an all day wedding and it's the first one where I can properly remember eating dinner. I mostly enjoyed the day (had a time out for a couple of hours after dinner when me and the OH snuck off and sat by the fire) and found that drunk people are fun and annoying in about the same measure. I saw a good friend get married, had an enjoyable day and no regrets the day after.
8. I've had to take a break from watching Chelsea Lately as she talks about drinking all the time. I'm sure I'll come back to it at some point....or maybe I won't.
9. You can get so much done in a weekend without a hangover. Or you can get so little done and just enjoy doing that.
10. I tried to write a blog about my experiences with alcohol and didn't get to age 18 before I had to stop. Overall the feelings are still a bit raw. I will do this at some point but not quite ready yet.
I tried not ramble but I have. Sorry!
As ever, wishing everyone all the best with their recoveries.
NS
I've not had much chance to be on for the last few weeks as I've had the company of my better half. He started a new job today and the house is quiet again so I thought I'd come on and post some thoughts and say hello to everyone!
I'm now somewhere between 4 and 5 months sober. I finally stopped counting weeks (and days) as the exact amount of time I've been sober has become less important to me than what being sober means for my life and those around me.
To stop me rambling on (as I tend to do!) I thought I'd list some things I've noticed in the past few weeks about my recovery:
1. Christmas and New Year were hard but I made it through. The cravings weren't as bad as I thought they would be but my 'bitterness' about other people being able to drink without problems blindsided me a bit. I'm trying to work on that and I'm sure it'll get easier as time goes on.
2. Given what I learned at Christmas this year, next year I will change the holiday period plans to make them more rewarding for me as a sober person.
3. I've been having a wry smile internally when I talk to people who are struggling with their attempt to give up the booze just for January. I feel their pain....and a lot more!
4. I love FOOD, coffee and exercise!
5. My other half continues to drink often in small amounts. This didn't bother me until one day recently I thought about it and decided it was a bit insensitive and since then it's been niggling at me.
6. I completed a 16 week counselling course for anxiety, depression and self esteem issues and the progress has been amazing. I don't recognise the person of 4 months ago.
7. I went to an all day wedding and it's the first one where I can properly remember eating dinner. I mostly enjoyed the day (had a time out for a couple of hours after dinner when me and the OH snuck off and sat by the fire) and found that drunk people are fun and annoying in about the same measure. I saw a good friend get married, had an enjoyable day and no regrets the day after.
8. I've had to take a break from watching Chelsea Lately as she talks about drinking all the time. I'm sure I'll come back to it at some point....or maybe I won't.
9. You can get so much done in a weekend without a hangover. Or you can get so little done and just enjoy doing that.
10. I tried to write a blog about my experiences with alcohol and didn't get to age 18 before I had to stop. Overall the feelings are still a bit raw. I will do this at some point but not quite ready yet.
I tried not ramble but I have. Sorry!
As ever, wishing everyone all the best with their recoveries.
NS
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Glasgow, UK
Posts: 362
Hi Dee.
To be honest, based on the counselling I've had I think it's probably my resentment/problem. I have a history of very high expectations of myself which I can transfer onto those around me. It can make me resentful/bitter when they don't 'measure up'.
There is no problem with his drinking and I don't have cravings seeing him drinking. If it causes me cravings or it becomes problematic I might have the chat but other than that I think I need to make my peace with it.
I can't help but feel if the roles were reversed I would have made the effort to have a few more sober nights for a bit of 'solidarity'. BUT I realise after the past few years I'm not really in a strong position to be talking about appropriate behaviour!
To be honest, based on the counselling I've had I think it's probably my resentment/problem. I have a history of very high expectations of myself which I can transfer onto those around me. It can make me resentful/bitter when they don't 'measure up'.
There is no problem with his drinking and I don't have cravings seeing him drinking. If it causes me cravings or it becomes problematic I might have the chat but other than that I think I need to make my peace with it.
I can't help but feel if the roles were reversed I would have made the effort to have a few more sober nights for a bit of 'solidarity'. BUT I realise after the past few years I'm not really in a strong position to be talking about appropriate behaviour!
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