greatfulmama

So I have been going to AA for close to 2 years and have really been struggling getting involved. I went from alcohol and then switched to pills and then shopping addiction and now I have started stealing from stores and got caught and I have the same mental obsession with this as I did with the drugs and alcohol.

I am a very honest person and feel like the dirt on the bottom of your shoe fro stealing items, I never would have dreamt of doing that. I cannot find any support groups regarding this so I thought I would come here and see if anyone has dealt with theft or switching addictions. I am pregnant and have 2 kids and until I got caught had NO criminal record, I am so afraid I am going to go to jail and am so afraid I am going to steal again. Just like alcohol and pills I said I am NEVER going to do this again and then the mental obsession starts and I do it again, I need help. I am so depressed, hopeless, my self esteem has never been lower. I have a wonderful life waiting for me and I have been miserable for years. It has been one thing after another and I feel SO alone and powerless. I am so afraid I am going to go to jail while pregnant and many other things. PLEASE, anyone, talk to me. I am sorry to sound so desperate but this issue is not something you can go announce at a meeting. I just feel like such a scum bag and have SO much guilt! I know its wrong and I hate that I do it!!

seahorse661

I can't really offer advice as I have only ever been a drinker but I understand the hopeless, unworthy feelings. Have you sought any counseling in addition to AA?

Anna

I think you might be switching from one addiction to another because you are not getting to the root of the problem. When I stopped drinking, I had a lot of work to do on myself. You might need to get in touch with the underlying reasons that you are addicted. Have you considered talking to a therapist?

FreeOwl

when I was young there was a period I fell in with a few folks who were into what amounted to "sport shoplifting".

I got caught and that ended that, but I also had periods in my life where I justified stealing - even from friends and family...

looking back it was a symptom of my own needs to deal with life and not having the tools or ability to do so with any clear tools. Also; drugs and alcohol were a big presence in my life.

it sounds to me as though you may have some similar issues going on - and one big step toward addressing it all will be getting sober and clean.

Apart from going to AA - are you working the program? Do you have a sponsor?

If the answer is no - then maybe it's time to consider whether you're giving this all you've got with all the earnestness at your command.

You don't have to stay caught in this downward spiral...

Ncognito13

Can't recommend this book enough.
Rational Recovery: The New Cure for Substance Addiction: Jack Trimpey
You can read the first 30 pages on amazon.

greatfulmama

Wow, Thank you all for your quick responses, it is so nice to know that I have people how there that can somewhat relate and are there for me. I do go to AA and I have a sponsor, I was "half-assing" it until 2 weeks ago when I wqenrt to jail for shoplifting, I hit rock bottom and realized I couldnt live like this anymore and started taking AA a LOT more serious and have been trying to go to a meeting every day, calling my sponsor everyt day, working the steps, and YES I do need to see a therapist, I think it would work wonders. It just blows my mind that after I got caught, went to jail ( I have never been to jail and it scared the crap out of me) and I STILL have the temptation and mental obsession to steal! I am a mom of 2 and have another on the way, live in a wonderful neighborhood, my husband makes great money, i LOOK like I have the perfect life HOWEVER am absolutely miserable and dying inside. Ughhhh I am just so lost and feel like such scum!

Renarde

I would get a therapist immediately! I'm sorry you are living like this.

Ncognito13

I'm no pro. I have relapsed a bunch of time, but if I learned anything from RR it's this. Quit destructive behavior. Accept it is no longer part of your life. Put it in your head that you no longer want to steal. It's the past. Don't be embarrassed by your past faults, just move on to better things.