Birthday this weekend..
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 78
Birthday this weekend..
Hi Guys,
I just wanted to post here as I'm feeling a little anxious about the weekend.
Its my birthday on Monday 20th and to celebrate I am going to watch a football match with my dad (who doesn't drink) on Saturday 18th. He is then going to see his partner out of town and I'll return to my home and end up being quite lonely (my two close friends are working night shifts).
I feel as though the exhilaration from the game will cause my mood to plummet when I get home on Saturday evening; and that it will spark some serious cravings; and ultimately; the pursuit of oblivion. For the past 8 years or so, however I've been feeling, whether its happy/excitable/depressed/stressed, whatever emotion, I have retired to my bedroom with a bottle of rum and listened to music to escape reality (even when things aren't so bad).
I guess I'm just trying to get some thoughts of my chest and hopefully someone has experienced similar feelings and maybe has some tips to combat them.
Thank you for your time
<me looking at my birthday circled on the calender.
I just wanted to post here as I'm feeling a little anxious about the weekend.
Its my birthday on Monday 20th and to celebrate I am going to watch a football match with my dad (who doesn't drink) on Saturday 18th. He is then going to see his partner out of town and I'll return to my home and end up being quite lonely (my two close friends are working night shifts).
I feel as though the exhilaration from the game will cause my mood to plummet when I get home on Saturday evening; and that it will spark some serious cravings; and ultimately; the pursuit of oblivion. For the past 8 years or so, however I've been feeling, whether its happy/excitable/depressed/stressed, whatever emotion, I have retired to my bedroom with a bottle of rum and listened to music to escape reality (even when things aren't so bad).
I guess I'm just trying to get some thoughts of my chest and hopefully someone has experienced similar feelings and maybe has some tips to combat them.
Thank you for your time
<me looking at my birthday circled on the calender.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
Isn't there something you can do after the game? Perhaps a movie or something like that?
If not maybe plan a big meal either on the way home or when you get home. It is harder to contemplate a belly full of booze on top of a large meal!
If not maybe plan a big meal either on the way home or when you get home. It is harder to contemplate a belly full of booze on top of a large meal!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
The plan needs to be to have a plan, what activities are you going to do that evening? other than coming home, sitting in and opening things up to the temptation of drinking, out of sheer boredom or a low mood.
Whether it be going for a long walk, reading, catching up on a TV series, whatever it is, it needs to be planned beforehand, leaving things to chance on the day leaves too much room for alcohol to push its way into the schedule!!
Whether it be going for a long walk, reading, catching up on a TV series, whatever it is, it needs to be planned beforehand, leaving things to chance on the day leaves too much room for alcohol to push its way into the schedule!!
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Sweden
Posts: 1,649
Well, whether you know it or not, you are doing some good recovery work. Being aware that triggers that might happen, anticipating spikes in emotion: that's all really good.
I'll simply repeat what mentium and all the rest said. And, what my sponsor said when triggering events loomed ahead was: plan, plan, plan. If you have to plan down to the last second, plan that too.
If you know that your mood might sink directly after the game, is there anyone you can plan to have dinner with? Maybe it's time to extend your social circle and reach out to a neighbor or an acquaintance that you don't know so well, and invite them for a meal.
If you are not involved in any recovery groups, maybe that would be a good night to drop by a meeting.
Go to the theater, even if you have to go alone. Go to a coffee shop with your laptop and join the other people surfing. We have to sometimes leave our comfort zone to survive!
I'll simply repeat what mentium and all the rest said. And, what my sponsor said when triggering events loomed ahead was: plan, plan, plan. If you have to plan down to the last second, plan that too.
If you know that your mood might sink directly after the game, is there anyone you can plan to have dinner with? Maybe it's time to extend your social circle and reach out to a neighbor or an acquaintance that you don't know so well, and invite them for a meal.
If you are not involved in any recovery groups, maybe that would be a good night to drop by a meeting.
Go to the theater, even if you have to go alone. Go to a coffee shop with your laptop and join the other people surfing. We have to sometimes leave our comfort zone to survive!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Posts: 166
I turned 30 this past November when I was about 7 months sober. I bought myself a root beer keg, invited a bunch of friends over, laughed a ton, and best of all I remembered everything that happened. By far the best birthday yet.
If I were you, I'd have several plans in place, with backup plans, etc., to make sure you don't talk yourself into drinking.
Then, once you've walked through your birthday sober, you'll never have the "well it's my birthday..." excuse to drink again. I find the more time that passes and the more events I walk through without drinking, the easier it becomes.
If I were you, I'd have several plans in place, with backup plans, etc., to make sure you don't talk yourself into drinking.
Then, once you've walked through your birthday sober, you'll never have the "well it's my birthday..." excuse to drink again. I find the more time that passes and the more events I walk through without drinking, the easier it becomes.
Stay sober. You won't regret it. 
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Nottingham (UK)
Posts: 2,690
On my birthday in August - I clung to the forum here and also treated myself to as many chocolates, sweets and ice-cream as I wanted 
Celebrate like you did as a child - with childish treats - you'll be amazed how fantastic you feel when you get through the day. Better buzz than you ever got from alcohol, I promise.
Celebrate like you did as a child - with childish treats - you'll be amazed how fantastic you feel when you get through the day. Better buzz than you ever got from alcohol, I promise.
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